Confessions of Vandalism

(upbeat music)

It’s pretty common that old
people struggle with new technology.

And people like to make
fun of that, but you have

to think in the days to
come, you will get old.

And in the days when you get old, are
you going to struggle with technology?

And the answer is yes.

I try to keep up with technology, but
I’ve also already seen that in some ways,

I’ve fallen off like there’s
some things I know about.

And then there are huge swaths of
technology that I don’t understand at all.

I used to think of myself
as fairly tech savvy.

Now I’m functional.

So I’m assuming in the next decade
or two, I’m going to be struggling.

I mean, you have to imagine when
I talk to my grandkids and I’m like,

why in my eyes does my
neural link show that it’s the

time in Greenwich Meridian,
instead of local time.

And my grandkids are like, oh my God,
grandpa, you’re so dumb, you’re so useless.

You don’t even know how to reset
your neural link with the extra net,

because the Internet
is not a thing anymore.

It’s all external.

That we’re all connected to all the time.

And I had my USB in my
neck installed backwards,

making it always very awkward
to put the USB in my neck.

And that’s what’s coming.

And so I’m just trying
to stay abreast of

technology so that I can
not be a complete idiot.

Now because I enjoy technology,
I’m hoping it lasts longer.

Like I play the video games, I make
the podcast, I like to learn things.

If I can just keep that spirit
alive, all at least no stuff.

I maybe I don’t, not proficient,
but I will understand things.

And that’s kind of the most important part.

A lot of older people in Japan, and
that’s most people, for being honest,

they don’t want to apply
for the My Number Card.

My Number Card is basically
a social security card of sorts.

It’s not because you already have
one of those if you’re Japanese.

It’s a different card.

The government wants
to unify its information.

So your health card.

So if I go to the
hospital or I go to a clinic,

I have to bring my
national health card.

I use that to get my national rates.

I’m like, I don’t want to
pay full price for medicine.

I want to get my whatever
percentage I’m supposed to get.

So socialized medicine in Japan, very good.

I can get medicine at reasonable rates.

It’s cheaper to go to the
doctor and get medicine,

and then go to like the proper pharmacist
than it is to buy over the counter drugs.

So if I buy allergy medicine,
something I buy every year,

I can get 30, 40 days worth of
allergy medicine for about 1,000 yen.

If I buy over the counter,
it’s going to be like

10, 15 days for more
than that, probably 1,500.

The reason older people don’t
want to apply for the My Number

Card is they find it difficult
to remember the password.

And so this is it when you create this
card, you have to create a password.

And if you forget it, that could
cause you problems down the line.

So you know what, I
just don’t want to do it.

I just don’t want to create
the card in the first place.

I’m not obligated to.

The government really wants
everyone to have a My Number Card.

From November, you can
choose not to set a password.

Now, as I said, I’m not
a technological expert,

but I do have a base proficiency with
technology, and I do follow the news a lot.

I can see absolutely
no problems with having

a password unprotected
information connected to your knife.

I have to, how do I, how do you phrase it?

I can see no problem with having
your national health insurance

and other personal information
non-password protected.

Now, they’re saying that if there’s no
password, you won’t be able to do stuff.

You won’t be able to use the stuff online,

which these old people
wouldn’t be doing anyways.

But a lot of that in the
news, Japan is scams.

And those scams prey upon old people.

And so if we know the old people have cards

that are unprotected, there’s got
to be a way to abuse that system.

And that is going to be, I
was literally my first thought,

not that I was coming up
with a scheme to abuse them,

but my first thought was
someone’s going to find cards

without passwords and
then try to find a way

to abuse the system to either
get medicine they could resell

or get medicine at such
a discount or something.

It’s scams, that’s what they do.

I’m waiting for this to
go through in November

and then January, the
story start coming out

of old people losing
a bunch of money or

something via the my
number card with no password.

Recently, one of the
problems is the people in charge

of my number were
investigated as some of the cards

were registered with
other people’s personal

information like
they’re addressing stuff.

So that with the password
is already showing, there’s

already problems and mistakes
with the my number card system.

Then a lot of stories recently
about the Pokémon thefts.

And Pokémon cards have become
a common target for thieves.

Stories get broken into
last week, we did the

guy who got scammed,
but like reseller, website.

And the guy who resoled
the stuff had filled real boxes

with juice boxes and I
made like a very extended

joke about just using
the word box too much.

It’s very well done considering
it’s not scripted, very well done.

I think she’ll go back
and listen to that one.

A company executive
sold five fake Pokémon

cards at a second hand
store for 283,000 yen.

They were specifically from
a Tokyo Art Museum event,

which actually shows the
level of Pokémon in Japan that

you, they have Pokémon
events with national museums.

Like that’s, I guess they
would have other events,

but it’s just, it shows the
level of Pokémon in society

when they have like
art exhibits for Pokémon.

It like not just a
museum, like a local one.

Oh, that’s neat.

This is like Tokyo Art Museum.

That’s a big deal.

The owner said these seemed
off, maybe the quality of the paper,

they were little grainy,
something like that.

So he called the police
and he got the police.

The police got the Pokémon
company to send out someone to

appraise the cards, which is a
whole world I was unaware of.

There are people who work
for Pokémon, who’s, I don’t know

about singular job, but
probably primary job is to be able

to appraise the reality
and value of Pokémon cards.

Because of the rarity of
the cards, some of these

cards are selling for 100,000
yen, maybe even upwards.

So you can make a lot of money if
you can get the rare, rare, rare cards.

The suspect was then contacted because
the appraiser for the Pokémon company,

said these were not real,
these were counterfeit cards.

He claims he didn’t know
they were counterfeit

and the police are
still investigating.

I’m interested where this ends up,

because either he
committed a crime and got

caught, or he legitimately
bought these cards,

thinking they were real,
and he got screwed over.

So Japan, Korea, the United States, there,

working together, they’re
trying to work together more.

I’m very happy about South Korea
and Japan working together more,

because I really think these two countries,
I know they have a very hard history,

but I think together they would
be a force to be reckoned with.

And values-wise, they
actually both countries

have very, what I
consider positive values.

And the United States,
sort of that backing of the

United States is making them
more stable in the economy.

We will get better in this.

I just think it’s a good stuff.

A lot of this actually comes down to China,

keeps trying to exert pressure
and create tension in Asia.

So Japan, South Korea
and the United States,

we’re talking to like, hey,
China’s all very up-body.

Maybe we added together
and take care of stuff.

We share information and stuff like that.

And everyone’s like, yeah, this is great.

Except China’s like, hey, that’s not cool.

So recently there was
a summit of some sort.

I actually stopped carrying so many
summers, the G7 summit, all these summers.

I don’t really care anymore.

This Chinese ambassador
guy comes out and he goes,

no matter how blonde you die your
hair, how sharp you shape your nose.

You can never become
a European or American.

You can never be a Westerner.

You must know where your roots lie.

So he’s, oh, I mean, further.

Japan and South Korea
should work with China

to prosper together and revitalize East
Asia, revitalize Asia and benefit the world.

Weirdly, none of them
have taken this seriously.

South Korea and Japan have not
taken this call to their roots seriously.

And it might be because China
keeps more exclusionary attitude.

When it comes to every other instance,

they have flown airplanes
over Japanese airspace.

They have taken like aircraft carriers
and sailed them really close to Japan,

like just right out of
legal limits and stuff.

They’re always banging
heads with everyone in Asia

and then here they
are saying like, hey,

man, why don’t you guys
want to work with us?

And it’s like, dude, you keep
kind of kind of the blow is up.

There have been stories
in Indonesia, Japan of

Chinese diplomats and
high level politicians,

basically threatening
to wipe everyone else

in Asia off the map on
more than one occasion.

They aren’t taking it
primarily this seriously

because of the nature
of China towards Taiwan.

Taiwan is an independent
nation, it’s part of China.

Nobody knows.

Taiwanese people, they think they’re
independent and they want to keep it that way.

That’s not working out for them.

North Korea, very supported by China.

Japan and South Korea may all sort
of have their issues in North Korea.

North Korea keeps shooting missiles
over Japan if you want to be specific.

And there’s the abduction issues.

There was a bunch of
people, this is sort of history.

North Korea abducted a
bunch of Japanese nationals

and South Korean nationals and
brought them back to North Korea

and they haven’t returned
them and no one knows

if they’re alive or dead
and it’s a big problem.

China in its conflict, oh,
China Russia in its conflict

of Ukraine, China’s
kind of on Russia’s side.

And so basically the fundamental
philosophical differences

Japan and South Korea are
diametrically opposed to China.

So this call to remember your roots.

I don’t see how that’s
really going to work out.

I don’t see how you can say, hey,
look, you and I, we disagree on everything.

But we come, it’s actually
like maybe my sister and I.

So if you met me and
then you met my sister,

you would see two people
who are very different.

We are, we just, we have different values.

Now she’s not a bad person.

I hope I’m not a bad person.

I don’t want to talk about it.

And unless I got to get some
like someone to back me up.

But our fundamental philosophies about
life and how you should live life differ.

And I essentially, we just
stay away from each other.

And it works out fine.

Because she doesn’t try to impose
her lifestyle on me and vice versa.

I don’t tell her how to her live her life.

China on the other hand
is telling other Asian nations

how to live their lives and that they
should sort of succumb to China’s power.

But it would be like
going to me and saying,

you, despite the fact
you agree with everything

your sister thinks,
should align yourself

with your sister because
you come from the same family

because you come from the
same house, that kind of thing.

And that’s just not how it works out.

China then went on to declare
that the US is exaggerating

ideological differences to
so confrontation and division.

Now Japan and America have had
a very positive relationship overall.

There’s issues, of course,
there’s always going

to be issues between
two different countries.

But overall, they have a
very positive relationship.

And this sowing ideological differences

in confrontation, again, if you
go back through the vast library

of Ninja Ninja Japan stories
and just go through everyone

where China has
mentioned, I think you’re going

to see a lot of stories of
China almost purposefully

sowing confrontation and division
when they don’t even have to.

So while Baffy did a story
about a kid who had cornrows.

So one of his parents
was black, one of his

parents is Japanese,
he has kind of puffy hair.

And he was going to go to
his high school graduation.

So he said to his daddy,
he’s going to look neat.

What’s a good hairstyle?

He goes to cornrows, sort of
traditional hairstyle for our people.

So let’s do that.

So he went to a salon, got cornrows.

I have never had cornrows.

I think it’s illegal for a man of
my complexion to get cornrows.

But he went to a salon.

I do know it takes a long time.

So he put a lot of effort
into making his hair look good.

He shows up at graduation.

The teachers are like, no,
man, I don’t like that haircut.

So you don’t get to graduate today.

So when they put them
in a different room upstairs,

so when they call your name, you
don’t come downstairs, and he just left.

And then they tried to like,
well, he decided to leave.

Well, he decided to leave
because you guys stuck him

in a room and told him he wasn’t
going to be allowed to graduate.

I really like the follow up
to this story just recently.

A group of volunteers for Juneteenth
decided to have their own ceremony.

And it was better with way cooler hair.

I could get into the details.

You don’t really need–
they basically got up.

They had a graduation.

They had a whole thing going on.

And they’re like, hey, we’d
like to celebrate this kid.

He graduated from high school.

He came to the front.

He said, thank you.

I feel special.

I feel more accepted in his story.

He’s kind of made it clear that,
again, Japan is a country is changing.

You got more and more mixed kids.

Japan is a society’s less homogenous.

And progress is going
to have these hiccups,

but it is going to happen, especially
with supportive people out in the world.

So I think that is a very
nice palette cleanser,

a very nice little story about
people saying, that kid’s important.

Since we’re talking about
schools, the city of Yuruma

doesn’t want to standardize school
uniforms as abolishing schools traditions.

And let me start the whole thing again.

City of Aruma doesn’t want
to standardize school uniforms

as abolishing schools traditional uniforms
would have a negative effect on students.

But I was like, what negative effect?

Because I know school
uniforms in Japan high

school to high school
are technically different.

But for the boys, it’s a blazer.

They might be slightly different colors.

The girls do talk about
the skirts and stuff.

But if you standardize them all, there’s

not really anything you
can play about anymore.

You just need, again, like a symbol or
something to show what high school you go to.

If that’s important, the fact
that you go to high schools

enough, again, this like
tiered system of this high

school is better than
that high school and stuff.

I don’t see any value in that.

So I was like, what are
the negative effects?

And then someone else
actually quite smartly asked

the same question said, it would be
diminishing pride and their sense of belonging.

But again, they could belong to the high
school group, the high school demographic.

The reason they started talking about this

is they were talking about the differences
in price in different school uniforms.

So in 2023, there was
a 16,000 yen difference

between the highest and
lowest priced school uniform.

For boys, the expense of
the cheap end was $50,930.

Yeah, not always.

And the high end was $66,700.

So depending on what uniform you
get or what school you go to, you’re

going to spending more or less
money, these things are expensive.

And so what this is actually about
is if we can standardize the price,

we could buy and bulk, we can
make more, we can make the cheaper.

And that would help out
mid to lower income families.

Not spend a ton of money.

They have another thing
in Japan where all the kids

have to get this backpack,
this leather backpack.

It’s called land sale.

I don’t know where that name come from.

I should actually look into
that because it is interesting.

But now my kids are too old.

They don’t use them anymore.

They’re stupid.

They’re like 50, 60,000 yen.

They’re ridiculous.

Now they do use them for a long time.

So they got to be sturdy,
but– man, give me 20,000 yen.

I’ll get you a backpack
that’s going to last five years.

Girls, the low end is 70,543 yen.

And the high end is 84,838.

So if you are a boy and you get the
cheapest uniform, you get 50,000 yen.

If you’re a girl and you get the
cheapest uniform, it’s 20,000 yen more.

If you are a girl and you get the
most expensive uniform, it’s 84,000 yen.

This was justified
because they all wear vests.

They vests come with the female uniform.

And justified because of the
fabric, the high end uniform.

In another prefecture, they
standardized the uniforms,

and it brought the price
down to 6 to 8,000 yen cheaper.

So the low end, 50,000
yen uniform, you could

drop that by 6,000, even
time for like 45,000 yen.

So, again, these uniforms,
they’re important in one way,

but it’s so stupid because the importance
is constructed, and I don’t believe it.

But I went to a high school or I
wore t-shirts and jeans every day.

So maybe that was my uniform.

I don’t know.

I just don’t put value in this.

I understand.

I actually am okay with the uniform system.

I think the uniform system
should be designed to be affordable.

I like when the school
has decided to go unisex.

So everyone just got
pants in a shirt and a jacket.

And if the girls wanted skirts, that
was extra, but that was a choice.

I liked when they made them from uni-glow,
so they were like 10,000, 20,000 yen.

Because, yes, we paid
for it, but it was expensive.

And it’s soft.

OK, so the story, big international
story, is that a guy vandalized the policy.

And he put his name– I think
him and his girlfriend’s name on it.

I did like when I read
that story that his excuse

was he didn’t know the call of
see him was of historical importance.

That’s what his lawyer said.

So he did it, and he got in trouble.

He’s looking like five years in prison,

and he’s crying, going like, no,
please don’t try and make the prison.

I don’t want to go to prison.

Well, dumb shit.

Not only did you vandalize it,
you put your stupid name on it.

Well, this thing happens
all over the place.

And in Japan, pretty much every
building is a historical site of some sort.

A 17-year-old boy violated the
cultural properties protection law.

So that’s the law of, if it’s
historically important, don’t touch it.

So this is kind of like, keep
your hands to your self law.

He carved letters using his fingernails.

So he was at a temple.

And temples are made of
wood, so if you have a strong

fingernail I was looking
at mine, I couldn’t do that.

But I cut my fingernails
all the way down for

judo, so a different
story, and you don’t care.

So he was used to,
maybe at a long fingernail

or a strong fingernail, and
he started carving his name.

He carved a big J, and then he wrote Julian,
making it incredibly clear who it is.

Now, here’s an idea.

What if you’d written someone else’s name?

So you get the thrill of vandalizing
and making your Mark in a historical site.

OK, so this is something I did.

I, my first year of university,
I fucked up housing.

I didn’t get an apartment.

I thought I was going
to get campus housing,

and then it was full, and I didn’t get
it, and ended up in a lottery system.

It didn’t look like I was going to get it.

My university has a frat
system, the Greek system.

So they had frat houses.

Now, I had no intention of joining
a frat, but they had empty rooms.

And it’s better for them to
have people in those rooms

paying a little rent
than it is to have those

rooms empty and not
making any money at all.

So I ended up for my
first year of university

living in a frat house where I was not a
member of the frat, which is a really weird.

But when I say the whole sentence out loud,

I just think that is one of the
weirdest things that’s ever happened.

They did spend the entirety of the
year trying to get me to join the frat.

I was not interested at all.

And it was a very–
I mean, as far as I yet

to live with another
guy, but it was fair.

I think they pressured my
roommate to get me to join.

So it’s like, hey, Peter likes judo.

You should join the judo
club and be really close

friends with Peter, and
then he’ll join the frat.

And then we’ll get $365 a year.

Because he got to pay a dollar a
day for these guys to be your friends.

That was back when I went to university.

So it’s probably a lot more now.

So this guy joined judo.

But he– I don’t know if he
had any real interest in judo.

And so basically, he
also has a weird attitude.

And I’m now gotten into judo stories.

I explained, don’t do this
step or you’ll get thrown.

And he was looking at me like, ha, ha.

I’m going to do this step.

And then he did this step in my through.

I said, this is just going to get worse.

The more you do this one,
move, the harder the counter gets.

And he was like, ha, I got you now.

And then he did it really big.

And he did it three, four, five times.

And I got really frustrated.

Because I was trying to help him.

And so then I just threw
him super, super hard

and just ran him into the floor
and he lost his breath for a minute.

But he didn’t get hurt.

But he was shaken and put it that way.

He didn’t last very long in judo.

Again, because I don’t think he
wanted to be in there in the first place.

Anyways, I was living this frat house.

Overall, not the worst experience.

Not as bad as I certainly
thought it was going to be.

Because I thought I would live
there and look for another place to live.

And then I ended up just
riding it out for the entire year.

The guys were fine.

They didn’t have any–
it wasn’t like the movies.

Like the Greek system in
American comedy movies.

But I was on– they had a little balcony.

It was wood.

It was really cheap.

And I was standing there.

And I started very much
like this kid just scraping.

I think I had a fork or an knife.

I just took scraping into it.

I was like, oh, I should vandalize this.

Because I don’t really like
the Greek system or whatever.

And someone in the house had pissed me off.

I was like, but if I write my
name, they can track it back to me.

Because it’s my name.

If I write Chuck Me Veest on something,
I’m like, hey, I think I know who did that.

So I wrote Fuzzy
Zellwager, which is a golfer.

I don’t know anything about golf.

I’ve played golf with my uncle once.

And I’ve gone to driving rain.

I’ve gone to driving ranges a few times.

But I don’t really follow golf.

So I don’t know why this golfer’s
name was in my head at that moment.

Maybe it just seemed to connect to
the frat system for me or something.

So I vandalized their house
with the name of a famous golfer

who never had been there, figuring
that if they were like, who wrote this?

And then you can just look at it and go,
well, apparently, Fuzzy Zellwager wrote it.

And that’s my vandalization story.

And I never got in trouble or went to jail.

Because I’m smarter than the two
fucking idiots who did it elsewhere.

Dave just moved in the background.

He was in his little bed.

And it’s hot.

So he goes in the bed.

And then he goes and he
stretches out next to that big pillow.

Sometimes he lies on top of the
pillow, but he stretches out his lines.

He’s a very long dog for how small he is.

He’s got very long sexy legs.

HyperX Fictosexual

There was the sub that went down to see the
Titanic in it and imploded and everyone was

all basically making
fun of it on the Internet.

Titanic therefore was sort of trending
in the whole space of the Internet.

Foody TV on June 24th
and July 1st scheduled

to play Titanic because
that’s what people want to see.

People want to see the movie
Titanic and everyone’s like,

“Oh, that’s in very poor
taste you shouldn’t show that.”

But it turns out they
made this schedule on

May 23rd months before the actual
Ocean Gate submarine thing happened.

So they were really just continuing
on with their scheduled programming.

So it’s a question of,
“If I make a schedule

to play a movie, an
incident happens that

relates to that movie, is it import
tastes to stick to my schedule?”

I don’t know.

So I think I go along
with people who are like,

“Look, Titanic, even if you like
it or not, is a very popular film.

It’s going to be shown on TV regularly.

If you don’t want to see it and
it offends you, don’t watch it.

It’s really that simple.

I don’t know what I would do.

If I was the head of
programming for Foody TV,

we’re like, “Okay, we’re
going to play Titanic

like it’s two hour, two
hour and a half hour movie.”

So that’s a huge block
of our scheduled time.

We’re going to play that today.

And then a sub explodes.


Very important to get the difference right.

A sub implodes.

Do you continue with your
scheduled programming?

I think you do.

Because the people have the choice.

This is one of the problems
with people and media.

Because people watch
media and then they get

offended and they start
to complain, they don’t

seem to realize they could at
any point stop watching that media.

This is not just TV, this is
TV, Internet, movies, whatever.

If you find something
offensive, don’t watch it.

If it doesn’t get watched, it goes away.

Well, except for this podcast.

No one watches this podcast
or listens to this podcast.

And I’m still here.

It’s like years and
years later, I’m still

saying the same dumb
crap into the same time.

I’m like, it’s sexy.

A new microphone from when I
started way better microphone.

HyperX Solo Cast.

6000 yen on Amazon.

There’s a group I work
with, a blind knowledge.

They are just a group of
podcasts that get in together.

They’re trying to get ads so we
can make some money, which is great.

So I’m going to practice.

I’m going to practice by dropping in
little ads here and there everywhere we go.

HyperX Solo Cast.

You can sponsor the podcast.

I’ll mention the microphone.

It’s up right in front of, if you
watch the video on YouTube.

I always stick it up in front of my face.

I’ve made sure I got a bright red cable.

USB cable to connect it to my computer.


Because it matches the
piping of my stupid chair.

I didn’t do that consciously, but
when I saw, oh, I need to plug it in.

It came with like a very long black cable,
which would have been sort of nondescript.

Then I saw I had this one in my,
in one of my junk drawers, basically.

And then I noticed it matches the
chair and I was like, I could have it.

And then I put a red
border around the screen.

That’s all I’m perfect.

People don’t think
of me as the kind of

person who does stuff for
aesthetics, because generally I don’t.

But I saw, I was like,
oh, I could match my

chair and my cable and
the border on the screen.

Yeah, why not?

Just click of a button.

Hyper-X solo cast for
solo casting your hyperness.

I don’t know.

I guess I have to work on that part.

Anyways, I don’t think
Fuji TV did anything

wrong by playing the
video about rich people.

dying when a bunch of rich people died
because no one cares about rich people.

You should listen to the last C McB to
get a good sense of why people don’t care.

I actually go into a little talk about
empathy and the function of empathy.

It’s very good.

If I’m being really honest,
I’ve done some shit episodes.

That was a good episode.

It drew in a lot of ideas.

You should definitely, if you
like whatever, just listen to that.

Finish listening to this first.

Don’t just like, oh, well, you told me
to listen to that stop and then go away.

Why is supposed to be already gone?

I already lost that group.

Oh well.

There’s a vice principal
and he was very helpful.

He put up some curtains
in a classroom for a

teacher and they had a
kerosene space heater.

So he went and got
kerosene and filled it up again.

And he decided that he
needed some appreciation.

He needed to be, you know, someone to show
him a very specific teacher, by the way.

She showed some appreciation
for the efforts he did on her behalf.

So amazing to ask for some kisses.

The little kids I’ve
filled up your space here.

A little kiss, please.

I put out some curtains for
what you look, please, please.

She seems to think this
was sexual harassment.

He’s just asked for a
little kiss here and there.

He actually asked for five and once tapped
on her shoulder and did a hugging gesture.

The teacher felt harassed, went to another
teacher and just sort of game the rundown.

The other teacher was like, oh, you shit.

No, this is not okay.

He was pulled into a
meeting and he said, I felt

that there were no
problems with my actions,

which therein lies the problem with his
actions because he thought that was okay.

I, let’s say I have a
coworker or something.

I find very attractive.

I know that going up
and asking for kisses for

mundane tasks is not
appropriate work behavior.

I might want to do it.

I’m like, oh, she’s very pretty.

I’d like some kisses.

I know that there is a problem
with me asking for kisses.

I just know that inherently.

I wasn’t even taught that.

Don’t sat down and
went through a list of rules

for me when I joined companies
and started working and stuff.

They never said
like, hey, Peter, if you

pick up a heavy box for a
lady, don’t ask for kisses.

They didn’t have to say that to me.

Apparently they needed
to say it to this guy.

It’s still probably wouldn’t have worked.

When he was being suspended, he hasn’t been
fired yet, but when he’s being suspended,

he had intended to improve
communication in the workplace.

How, again, how is the question
that never gets answered?

I want to be on these boards.

I want to be the guy on the
board who talks to these people.

I don’t know how I get that job.

The problematic board member.

No, that makes it sound
like I’m the problem.

The investigation into problematic
behavior of board member.

That’s better.

I want to be that guy.

When he says to me,
dead seriously, I intended

to improve communication
in the workplace.

I can look at him and go, how?

How does asking for kisses
improve communication?

Then listen to the incredible because
he’s going to have a dumb, long answer.

You know the answer is long.

The answer is long because
they’re trying to justify gross behavior.

That’s what these people do.

Again, he doesn’t think anything is wrong.

He’s going to have
reasons like, oh, if we do

more at kissing, we’ll feel
closer and work together better.

He’d say something like that.

He would be dead serious and he’s wrong.

Scam alert.

I wanted to look some more into scams.

That actually might be a
theme of a future podcast,

either in the ancient
New Japan or Seemingly.

Looking to some of the
bigger scams that have

gone throughout life,
scams are interesting.

What has happened is a
guy did an unboxing video.

Unboxing video was one hour and 38 minutes
long and he does not say a single word.

I didn’t watch the little thing.

He may actually speak at some point, but
he ordered 60 plus packs of Pokemon cards.

He’s a big fan of Pokemon.

He wants to Pokemon cards.

He did it through a reseller.

There’s a website called Marikari where I
could sell my HyperX solo cast microphone.

Should I grow tired of it and want to
upgrade to the HyperX quad cast microphone?

The quad cast microphone
is the one with lights.

It’s a little taller and
it has LEDs inside and

you can change colors
and you can make it vibrate.

Not vibrate physically, vibrate the lights.

Although if it did
vibrate, it’s weird when

you gross yourself
out because it’s like you

let the intrusive
thoughts just come out

before you filter them, much
like our man and his friendly kisses.

The scam, he bought a giant box.

He opened the box.

This is unboxing video of unboxing videos.

His unboxing video of
opening a box with more

boxes in it where he
unboxed each box in the box.

He went to Marikari where he
bought these from another seller.

There were more than 60, I think it
was like 64, 65, but a bunch of a lot.

50 of the boxes had juice boxes
inside them instead of cards.

So what this person had done, the scam.

He got actual Pokemon
boxes because every box

he unboxes is a real box and it’s
not like a real box someone made.

It’s a real box from the
Pokemon Corporation.

And shrink wrapped.

So this guy bought
the boxes, opened the

boxes, took out the
cards, got a juice box, put

it in, and then close
up the box and then

shrink wrapped it again
and then box the box

into a bigger box and
sent that big, big box

to this man who
bought it on the Internet.

That’s a lot of work.

Why did he fill it with juice boxes?

Well it’s because the juice box weighs
basically the same as a box of cards.

So the weight of the
big box with all the little

boxes in the box would
weigh the appropriate amount.

And so when he got it, he wouldn’t
be suspicious, he opens the box.

I bet you just put a
line in there like once

open, there’s no returns
or something like that.

And he’s actually kind of screwed
himself that way by opening

to check the boxes that
he’s unboxing from the big box.

I feel bad for this guy.

He’s one hour and 38 minute YouTube video.

I did watch chunks of ice skips
through it because he just opens the box.

He takes a box out
of the big box, the little

box out of the big
box and he weighs it.

So it has the right
weight and then he opens

it up and it’s a juice
box and then he puts

it to the side and then
he opens it up, juice

box, juice box, juice box, juice
box, juice box, juice box, juice box.

I bet the box of cards
though because this

guy’s a scammer and
he has all the equipment

I bet he’s taken out any
good cards and just put

all the crap cards into
the box that the guy bought.

Yeah, it’s kind of, it’s, it’s shit man.

I don’t enjoy unboxing videos.

The Japan consumer
agency, so this is the, the

monitor television and
advertising and stuff

to make sure you’re
not breaking any rules.

They would have to
dominoes and they give them

a warning because of a
service charge printed on flyer.

I have the, let’s say list of prices
and then delivery fee and whatnot.

That all should be together.

And then there is a
service fee on the other

side of the flyer and
that service fee was

in really small font which made
it really hard for you to see it.

Now it was about 300 yen, 6
to 7% of the cost of the pizza.

I was wondering what
the service charges for.

Like dominoes is a service.

So I’m ordering a service
from a service provider

to get the service and
they had a service charge.

That seems like bad service.

If I’m bringing really honest, it seems
like you know, appropriately bad service.

I’m not happy about that.

But I am happy with
the HyperX Solo Cast

microphone I have right
here in front of me and

the Dulce tones you’re getting through.

It came.

Oh, I should actually do.

I was about to do like I
should do the mic arm too.

The mic arm was 3000 yen.

So in total, the whole setup
basically cost nearly 10,000 yen.

It’s luling arts which is
a cheap manufacturer

but it’s just I don’t do moves
the arms around very much.

Once I put it in
position, it sits there

while I do the whole podcast
or I play games or whatever.

But it came with the
pop filter which is why

you’re not getting the posters
as strongly as you should.

At least I hope not.

And then it also came with a variety
of ways you can attach it to the arm.

So honestly, as far as
products go, the HyperX

Solo Cast plus the
Luling Arts arm for putting

it on my desk and
moving it around and stuff.

The arm actually makes a huge difference.


I know this is like supposed to be a stupid
joke that I’m doing throughout the podcast.

Callbacks what not.

It is funny.

But if you are going
to do podcasting or

streaming or something
like that, you should

get a mic arm because it’s
way less effort to set it up.

If you have an open desk,
you can just swing it away.

Mine doesn’t, it has like a shelf to the
side but I can push it back into the corner

and I don’t have to
like set it up every time.

I don’t have to get a stand or anything.

That is the benefit of a mic arm.

So Domino’s had a service charge.

The service charge was 6 to 7%
of your purchase up to 300 yen.

Very technically, 299 yen.

But they said, oh no, we’ve gone in
trouble with the consumer agency.

The Japan consumer agency.

So we’ll get rid of that
service charge and we

will just increase the
price of pizzas by 9%.

And that was part of their apology.

We’re like, oh, we’re sorry we had the
service charge that was 300 yen, maybe 6, 7%.

of your pizza pie.

We’re sorry we did that.

We’re going to increase
the price of pizzas by 9%.

So they came out of this making
more money and I now, I hate Domino’s.

I never cared about Domino.

I didn’t have positive or negative
feelings about Domino’s before.

Now, totally 100% negative
feelings about Domino’s.

He just sends the bitches.

This is awful.

The price of everything
has been going up in Japan.

Like little bursts.

I have noticed costs of
things I just buy regularly.

I have gone up but onto a new topic.

What is a salt?

And it is, it’s a tough question
because it could be a lot of things.

And so this was one of the more interesting
assaults that I’ve read about only because

I’m as, I don’t want to
make any assumptions.

Let’s just go through the story.

A man was feeding his child an onigiri.

Onigiri is a usually
triangular packed rice ball.

The very basic one is just rice and salt.

They pack it into a
ball or they make a

little triangle is what you’re going
to get in like a convenience store.

Because they’ll push some
fish or something into the middle.

Give it a little flavor boost.

I do like the salmon ones
or the tuna and mayonnaise.

It’s like getting, I don’t want to buy a
tuna sandwich from a convenience store.

I wish I should buy an example
and actually do it on screen.

They make the sandwich
and it’s like a triangle.

And then there’s the
bit that faces out towards

you and it’s this
big fat thing of tuna.

And it’s because they’ve
taken a dollop of tuna

and put it at the very
front of the sandwich.

So it looks big.

But then if you open it up,
90% of the sandwiches empty.

They say it’s so that
you can spread the tuna

yourself, which no
one is ever going to do.

So essentially you take
one bite of tuna and then you

just have like white bread
for the rest of the sandwich.

Never bought a sandwich again.


And that was all convenience
stores were judged

the same because of
this behavior of just one.

So the man is feeding
his child a rice ball

and then his wife starts
scolding the husband.

They don’t say what about
how he’s about the details.

I don’t know what you would scold
him or what was she pissed off about.

The man shoves the only
giddy in her face, which is a soul.

Like I’m not joking, it is a salt.

Now if you just shoved it in her
face, it wouldn’t have hurt her.

But that’s like spitting
on someone, spitting

on someone doesn’t hurt
you physically, but it is a soul.

So yes, it is a salt,
but usually we talk

about violence and I
was like, it’s not really

violence is it, but
then of course it is

violence because
again, the spitting counts.

So shoving an only giddy in
someone’s face should also count.

She calls the cops, cops
show up at the guy’s house.

She’s got rice all over her face.

That was apparently an
important point because that’s

essentially the evidence that
what she’s saying was true.

I was like, uh, she could call the cops
put rice on her face and then say he shoved

only giddy in my face
and he would get arrested.

Uh, and he was arrested.

I mean, there’s nothing to say about that.

He did assault her because it weddings.

It’s a tradition shoved
cake in your partner’s face.

Ha ha ha.

That’s a salt.

I think we better like crack down on that.

Actually, last week on Engineers Japan, I
talked about a guy who took a job online to

steal Pokemon cards,
drop them off and go to

a secondary location
and collect money for

his theft.

Uh, turns out it was a scam.

He stole the cards, gave him to a guy
who just disappeared and never paid him.

This is a weirdly
common trend recently in

the news of people
getting crime jobs online.

So a couple weeks ago, there was
a break in at a luxury watch store.

Three kids.

I mean, I say kids
because the one who got

arrested was like 19, but the
other two might have been older.

They didn’t know each other.

So actually, that’s why
I don’t know the ages

of the other people who
were the perpetrators.

They were part of this ring who got recruited
to commit this crime on the Internet.

They didn’t know each other.

There was someone sort
of coordinating all the stuff.

This one guy just got arrested.

What he did is he took
a job online and they

said, go rent a car,
park it in this parking

place, put the key on top of
the front right tire, let’s say.

He was on top of the tire,
but they didn’t see which one.

And then take off.

It was used in the
highest last week in Tokyo.

So he got arrested for
being part of the highest.

He didn’t even know what
the crime was going to be.

He just wanted to get
paid to pay off some debts.

So he took this shady job.

Man, guess what?

He never got paid.

So he participated in the crime.

He was part of the
conspiracy to commit a crime.

He did the crime and
never got anything for it.

So I’m like, if you’re
going to get arrested,

you might as well have
at least have committed

the crime or profited off the
crime you were trying to commit.

Like a bunch of guys got away with watches.

If they turn them in, they are dead stupid.

Like I know reselling, I
talked about it last time.

I wouldn’t know how to resell
a watch and not get caught.

I actually talked at
length about how I couldn’t

even like, launder money properly
because I don’t know about that.

I would have to go online
and research it and stuff.

And then they would
go through my browser

and find out that I’d been
researching how to launder money.

That’s my downfall right there.

But it is a bit
terrifying that all these

people are getting into crime
and getting ripped off in the crime.

But of course, if you’re going to commit
a crime, don’t trust the other criminals.

That’s like crime movie 101.

There’s don’t trust any of the
other people in your crime circle.

Whole life is a VTuber agency.

So they basically, I
was considered because

I never wanted to put
my face on the screen.

I thought of doing a VTuber.

So get a super cute anime girl
VTuber thing and not change my voice.

Not try to do a cute voice.

Just speak completely normally.

So I have the contradiction.

And it’s weird because as soon as I say
that people will have been done before.

Do you know how many
things have been done before?

Like everything, like music and stuff.

Like I get, I’m too late to be the first
at pretty much everything in the world.

But that’s fine.

If I do it and I do it
well, it’s still funny.

So I was thinking about doing
this podcast with a VTuber face.

I was thinking of streaming with a
VTuber face, all that kind of stuff.

But realistically, I just
didn’t want to go through

the effort of learning
another piece of software.

It’s really more than anything else.

I just didn’t want to learn the software.

If something else comes along, it’s
easy in the future and I might do it.

But I could do an avatar of my own face.

It would be such a lame avatar, whatever.

So they had whole life.

They are an agency for VTubers.

They were having a
shareholders meeting last week.

We also had a conversation
about shareholders.

And this guy showed
up and completely

inappropriately showed
up at the Nintendo meeting.

This guy shows up in full, I have to
get the name right, Roushia cosplay.

So cute.

VTuber girl.

This guy shows up in full cosplay.

And then he gets
really angry that he’s not

allowed in because to
get into the shareholder.

meeting, the company
actually holds a lottery.

So you don’t just like show up.

I’m a shareholder.

I can join.

I assume this guy is a shareholder
because he thought he could just walk in.

And they’re like, no,
you have to apply in

this lottery because we can only
fit so many people in the meeting.

And then the people
who win the lottery come

in, they can ask their
questions and whatnot.

Also we want to be
able to turn away certain

people who obviously
are not in the right

mindset for a shareholders
meeting, which is

not where we do full
cosplay and talk about stuff.

What did this person want?

They had some signs with them.

They started protesting
that they weren’t allowed in.

They started protesting about
the termination of Roushia.

So basically their
favorite VTuber was being

cut and they were
coming to the shareholder

meeting to demand
the reintroduction, which

was very similar to the
guy who showed up to

the Nintendo shareholder
meeting who was angry

that the female
inklings in Spat-splatoon

were being sort of
treated better or promoted

more than the male
inklings from Spat-Tune.

I have to be very careful
because I don’t play Spat-Tune.

So I don’t really know all the verbiage.

I read a thing and it said inkling.

I’m assuming inkling is
both male and female.

I can’t actually see that’s true.

What I can say is true
that the HyperX Solo

Cast microphone is one of the
best microphones for the price.

So I could just slide it in.

Just like DM’s, just slide that one in.

No one had even noticed if I just
kept going and didn’t point it out.

So the guy I never got in, Roushia still
terminated so a complete waste of time.

Okay, our last story is
because I learned a new word.

I don’t want to go
through this whole story.

Four and a half years ago, a man
married a virtual idol at Tsune Miku.

So he had a ceremony, had a wedding.

When I read about this
story, I was immediately

like, “I’m going to
make fun of this guy.

It’s going to be really funny.”

And then his backstory is pretty tragic.

So I stopped wanting to bully him because
that’s how he ended up the way he is.

He had confessed his love.

Oh, creepy Mcreaster in the chat.

He said that inkling is the race.

Thank you.

I actually worth knowing if I’m actually
going to ever talk about them again.

Hopefully I don’t.

It’s not like I’m anti-splatoon.

It seems to be a whole backstory
there that I don’t want to learn.

It’s all like post-apocalyptic
stuff too, from what I understand.

But thank you.

So an inkling is the race, not the gender.

Which again, I didn’t know.

I don’t want to judge
people based on gender.

I’m open.

Whatever gender– that’s actually related
to what I’m talking about right now.

So anyways, this guy,
he had confessed his

love in his youth seven times
and was rejected seven times.

So that hurts.

I mean, I, as a young man, tried
to ask out girls, got rejected.

But I was lucky
enough that I didn’t get

rejected so much that I kind of like
built up a wall to the world around me.

This guy on top that was
also bullied in high school

and university and then
on into the workplace.

And he had to take a leave of absence.

And so in his leave of
absence, this is where

all my sympathy started actually like
turning really quickly towards this guy.

In his leave of absence, when he was stressed
out and living like a shut-in, heard a

Hatsune Miku song and
the voice kind of inspired him.

I don’t personally like
Hatsune Miku music, but

the fact that it spoke
to him in that moment

and made him a happier
person, I am kind of on board.

I mean, I don’t like
stuff that other people

like, other people don’t
like stuff that I like.

I want you to be happy.

I want to be happy too.

So I suddenly was like, I don’t
want to make fun of this guy anymore.

They did a survey
and found that 10% of

university students
have romantic feelings for

a game character or a fictional character,
a game character, and an anime character.

Female university students, it’s 17.1%.

I don’t know what you can do with that
information, but at least if you want to talk

to 17% of the female
university population,

video game character, you should
ask them like what character they like.

There’s a 20% chance that they’re going to
get real excited about and talk about it.

That’s the first step is to
actually interact with people.

So this guy, after
experiencing years of

bullying, finding something
that makes him happy,

decides that in the real world he
wants to marry this virtual idol he does.

And his life is improved.

He decides that he’s going
to find other people like him.

And of course, like
there are 10% of university

students who have
those feelings, maybe

they don’t go so far
as to actually marry a

fictional character, but
they have those feelings.

He set up a support group and the
support group is for fikto-sexuals.

And like I said, I was going
to make a bunch of jokes.

I had a bunch of
jokes until I read the

story and then I was like, I have
nothing but sympathy for this guy.

And I hope he and the people
in his support group are happy.

He was talking about
how he goes through life

and people call him
disgusting and stuff.

And it’s horrible.

But I’m like, he’s not hurting anybody.

So if he’s actually
happy with his virtual

idol, I hope he stays
happy with his virtual idol.

Just like I’m happy with my
HyperX solo cast microphone.

I just realized that my
video could be tagged

for promotion, despite
the fact that I am

promoting the product, but
I’m not getting any money for it.

So I guess it’s paid
promotion is the issue.

This is literally just
promotion, not paid promotion.

So I guess it doesn’t count.

Unless HyperX solo cast wants
to reach out, I am willing to add

the HyperX solo cast
brand, HyperX in general,

brand into every story
I do on this news Japan.

And I will just again,
I’ll just slide it in.

People after a while
won’t even notice, it’ll

be like, uh, subliminal advertising
because I just be so smooth.

Number 2 best Japan News Podcast

(upbeat music)

So you’re on the train in Japan.

When you see a man with
knives, what do you do?

You call the police.

That actually is not the
most unreasonable response.

I think people need to understand
that in Japan, carrying a knife is illegal.

Just straight up.

If there was a story, and it’s
the one that bugs me the most,

’cause there was a tourist,
and he went in to get to it,

like these little police
stations called Koma,

went into a coma, and
he talks to the cops,

he’s like, “I’m trying
to find this place.”

Basically, he’s just
trying to get directions.

And the police, given directions,
they talk to him and they

chat and they have him and they
go, “Hey, do you have a knife?”

And he goes, “Yeah.”

And he’s carrying a Swiss army knife,

little Swiss army knife, and
they arrest him right there.

And something people forget is
when they come from their country

to another country, the laws of
their country don’t come with them.

Actually, a lot of people
seem to be confused about the

rules in another country,
’cause they don’t look into it.

They just assume that my rights
and my freedoms are the same.

So, search and seizure rules.

You probably don’t know what
they are in different countries.

What’s legal to carry?

The reasons for it, you
probably don’t know it.

Japan has very strict
weapon cultures, not just guns.

Gun control, very high.

Anything that could be a weapon.

We had last couple of years
crossbows were made illegal.

Airsoft guns are tightly controlled.

The, in here we have
a guy carrying a knife.

And it’s just, where I
just lost that sentence.

We have a carrying a knife is illegal.

Unless you have a reason
for carrying the knife.

So, you see a man on the train in
Japan, he’s carrying multiple knives.

It makes sense to call the police.

Now, was he brandishing the knife?

Was he doing anything with it?

This is actually interesting
because I’ve ended up finding,

when I do an engine news Japan story, I
try to do like proper research to a degree.

I try to find multiple articles about the
same story so I can see what is consistent.

So that’s probably true.

I’m not gonna say factual.

And I can see if there’s
any inconsistencies.

One story said he had basically a knife
case, like one of those things you put,

you slide the knife into slots
and you roll it up and tie it up.

And one said he had
knives wrapped in a towel.

And the ends were poking out.

And one story said he
was brandishing a knife.

So somewhere in there is the truth.

These are supposed to be reporters.

I’m an engine news Japan.

I’m a guy who does this on his day
off with his dog sleeping on the bed.

For fun.

This is a hobby, it’s entertainment.

And I put more work into making
sure my stories are factually accurate.

Then major news sources.

You may have seen a
tweet or an Instagram post

I’ve put up recently on the
top 25 news in Japan list.

The first thing that gets
me is how specific that list is.

It’s not like, it did say the
little, “Oh, let me pull it up.”

So it’s the 25 best Japan news podcast.

Very specific category,
if we’re being honest.

The best Japan news podcast from
thousands of podcasts on the web.

Now that actually is a misnomer because
yes, there are thousands of podcasts,

but there are not thousands
of Japan news podcasts.

Ranked by traffic, social
media followers and freshness.

The engine news Japan.

That is okay traffic
for a podcast for sure.

And it’s absolutely fresh.

I mean, you’re tasting
it smelling it right now.

It’s fresh.

Social media followers, not so much.

That is, I admittedly might be as weakness.

You’ll see on the screen,
it Japan news podcasts.

Number one, deep dive from the Japan times.

Japan times is a national
newspaper in Japan.

And their little tagline is looking
beneath the surface of Japan.

We hear from Japan
times journalists and guests

about current events
and trends in Japan.

Number two, little podcast
called the engine news Japan.

All the news from Japan, there is no ninja.

Little, I guess, self-congratulatory
little, boop, boop, boop.

I don’t know what the
criteria was for that, really.

I bet an engine news
Japan is just the most

consistent Japanese news
podcast release schedule

because it is basically every
week I get one of these out.

So back to our knife man story.

So you call the police, you see guy,
oh, this is a happy end of the rules.

So you’re allowed to carry a knife.

You’re not allowed to
carry a knife in Japan.

You’re allowed to carry a
knife if you have a reason.

So let’s say I’m going fishing
and I am carrying with me a knife

for de-boning fish or scaling
fish or something to do with fishing.

The police would say, hey,
why do you have that knife?

Well, I’m going fishing and I’m going
to do some fish stuff with my fish knife.

There would be all right on your way.

I have a machete, be pretty rare in Japan.

They say, why do you have the machete?

Well, I’m a intense
gardener, extreme gardening.

That’s my job and I’m going to the
jungles of Japan and I’m going to machete.

Now that also would be
acceptable under Japanese law.

So I can’t just carry around a knife.

So this tourist who probably just
carried around a Swiss army knife

all the time, primarily, probably not
for the knife, but more for the screw.

The screwdriver was always
the thing I ended up using

the most or picking my
nails, that kind of thing.

That is not acceptable because
there’s no reason for you to carry a knife.

So this guy on the train, I
almost said there were it.

I got to keep the tension high.

So he sees the tension
that you have to build

so that people stay
for the whole podcast.

That end of the dirty story is
I always put them at the end.

At the next station, someone,
someone sees this guy, he’s got knives.

It calls the police, police rush
the train in the next station.

He’s a chef.

Now, he says he had adjusted the knife.

So maybe he has one
of those against sleeves

where all the knives
are in it and you roll it up.

Maybe they were wrapped in
towels in the ends or poking out.

So he was trying to make sure it was safe.

He was not brandishing,
according to this story that

seems the most reasonable,
he was not brandishing it.

He was probably making an
adjustment, probably for other

passenger safety because he
knew he was carrying knives.

But this stopped one of
the major lines in Tokyo,

which affects hundreds
of thousands of people.

So I don’t know.

It’s not unreasonable for the
person to have called the police.

The guy was not threatening anyone, though.

I’m going to assume I’m going to,
because if he isn’t actually a chef,

I think if he wasn’t a
chef, they would have said.

If he’s actually a chef, he’s
carrying his knives, carrying for work.

He’s being responsible.

And there’s no reason to
call the police on him, but

then we have all the crimes
in Japan or knife crimes.

I don’t know.

It’s a really tough situation because
I don’t know who’s in the wrong.

Maybe if you’re a chef
carrying your knives,

put the knives wrapped
up into a backpack.

or something else, just because you
can avoid this and not freak people out.

When making threats in any country, in any
scenario, it is important to be accurate.

There’s a man who felt it was completely
appropriate for him to make threats.

And so he’s unhappy about
the situation with Russia and the

aggressive nature of the
Russian Federation at the moment.

So he sent some emails and he
said, “I’ll put all workers through hell.”

Don’t really know what that means.

So all the workers in Russia, how are
you going to put them all through hell?

Why are you talking about
the workers specifically?

It seems like the government
is what you should be targeting.

He said, “Please kill the president.
Who are you sending that to?

Sending that to Russia?
Just please kill the president of Russia.”

I think he actually means Putin.

Russia has a president and Putin,
who is sort of the actual leader.

So I think this man maybe
doesn’t have it all together.

Let’s make Squzkiji a sea
of blood without any contact.

So let’s, as in you, people of Russia and
me, some a 50 year old man from Japan,

let’s go to these
disputed islands and fight.

I don’t know.

Now the problem was he thought he
was sending these to the Russian embassy,

but instead he sent the emails to the
Asahi Shimbun, which is a newspaper.

So he was inadvertently
threatening to make the

lives of every worker in
the Asahi Shimbun, hell.

He was threatening for them to kill
the president of the newspaper, the Asahi

Shimbun and he was saying, “Hey guys,
who are from the same country as me?

Let’s go to these disputed
islands and make a sea of blood.

So let’s kill everyone else together.
I’m not sure.”

He did say, “Okay, their
articles did not match my beliefs.”

And I thought I emailed the Russian
embassy, but instead I sent emails to the

Asahi Shimbun. So basically they
were writing articles about Russia.

He was saying, “The
Russian beliefs, I do

not agree with, so I
started sending emails,

probably clicked a link on
the article and started sending

emails to the Asahi Shimbun,
it’s retin making various threats.

It is obstruction of business.”

That’s clear.
I mean, that’s almost a given.

And I mean, think about it or be careful.

I don’t know. If you’re going to go
through the effort of threatening people,

at least making sure you’re
threatening the right people.

Russia is as an international
politics as a high school drama.

Russia used to Mark the end of
World War II as a day of military glory.

Okay, so basically we have
Remembrance Day, we have several days.

Each country has so to
their own version where

they remember the
horrors of World War II.

Japan has recently, like many
countries, sanctioned Russia.

And Russia seems to have taken that poorly.

So the lower house and Russian
parliament, I think it’s parliament.

Anyway, the lower house and Russian
government has voted to rename

the Day of Military Glory
to Day of Victory over

militaristic Japan in
the end of World War II.

That is some high school shit right there.

So we’ve invaded Ukraine.

A lot of Western countries don’t like it.

Japan doesn’t like it.
We’re somehow particularly

pissed that Japan has
taken the stance on this.

So we’re going to change the
day that World War II ended, our

celebration of that, and make
it specifically about Japan.

Oh yeah. Well, you don’t like
that we’re invading Ukraine?

Well, we’re going to
take the Day of Military

Glory and change it to
the Day of Victory over

militaristic Japan in
the end of World War II.

Technically speaking,
World War II is not ended.

This is something I’ve brought up before.
It’s interesting. It’s a little side fact.

There are disputed islands
at the North part of Japan.

And those islands are disputed between
Russia and Japan at the end of World War II.

Since they have not
come to a resolution,

they have not signed
an official peace treaty.

They’ve just kind of stopped fighting.

So because that peace
treaty has not been signed,

World War II very
technically is still ongoing.

No one’s going to say that seriously, but
until a peace treaty is signed in those,

that those islands are
resolved, like who actually owns

those islands, as long as
those claims are standing,

World War II is still happening.

So you’re cheating on
your partner. Your side

piece, they’re into it.
So they give you a hickey.

You go home. I got a
big hickey on my neck. My

partner is going to
find out I’ve been having

an affair. So what do
I do? There’s only one

solution I can think
of. Okay, realistically,

I had a girlfriend and I
gave her a hickey the

day before she had a
job interview and she was

losing her mind. So I went
online and looked, what

you’re supposed to do,
I don’t know if this was,

is take a cold spoon
and push it against the

hickey and that’ll
help it. So basically put

ice on it will help it heal
faster. She put makeup

on it, probably the
most reasonable solution

for being honest. This
person came up with

the non-reasonable
solution, which is great,

because that’s how it
becomes an engineer’s Japan

story. The number two
news on Japan podcast.

After people who are paid
to do this, so I mean, all right,

she calls the police. She calls 110
and she reports a sexual assault.

She says, it’s 6.30 am the
intercom in her apartment

or house rang. She opened the door and a
man came in, took off her top, touched her

inappropriately, gave
her a hickey and left.

Now, if I am reporting
a sexual assault, more

happens. A guy is not
going to grab you, touch your

boobies, give you a
hickey and leave. So that’s

where actually the first
drop of suspicion would

come into it. That is a
very strange sexual assault.

If you were walking
down the street and a guy

grabs you, there’s
other people rounding and

runs away, that makes
sense. He’s got you in his

your apartment. It’s private.
No one’s going to walk in on you, probably.

I don’t know. So the
police were obviously

suspicious, or they were
just taking her seriously.

Actually, pretty fair,
they probably just took her

at a word. She says she
was sexually assaulted.

Let’s go try to find the
guy. They find out she

wasn’t at home at 6.30.
There’s footage of her

coming home quite casually after 7 o’clock
in the morning. I also have a thing about

very early morning
crime. I think once you get

after 4am, no one’s
really at their best. So

if I was going to commit
crime, any crime, it

would be in the, like
around the 1am period,

maybe 2. I’m not
functional at 4 or 5, 6 in the

morning, which is when
you’d have to get up and

get ready to do these
crimes that happened at

6.30 in the morning. The
police looked at security

footage. The woman was
not home. They found footage

of her coming home.
That is when they started

talking to her more
seriously and she admitted

that she had not been
sexually assaulted. She was

just trying to hide the
fact that she was having a

fair and explained the
hickey that was on her neck.

She could have just stuck
a vacuum on when her

boyfriend came home and
been like, “Hey, look what I

did. Ha ha ha ha.” There
you go. I’m just a weird

quirky lady doing weird
quirky things giving

myself hickey’s. I think
I actually just found

a better solution like
as making a stupid joke,

I think it’s more reasonable
than calling the police.

Nintendo is a big company.
They have an annual

shareholder meeting where
they talk about business

stuff with business people
who have shares. These

are not gamers. These
are business people and

all they care about is numbers go up. It’s
going to be the theme for the next C-McB.

You should look out
for that later this week.

C-McB podcast is my
other podcast where I

talk about not news
from Japan, but honestly,

I think this episode is going to be
talking about news. If you like the

Ninja Japan news and
commentary, which is the

color commentary and
editorializing is what you

come from. You might
actually enjoy this other

episode. I would say, give
C-McB a try this week.

So these are not gamers.
They’re business people

who want to do business
stuff and make business

decisions and make
money and numbers go to

the, well, if I’m looking
at it, it goes to the

right and up. So right
and up. But if I’m looking

away, if I’m standing
like to the audience,

it would be to the left
still up up is the important

part. Unless you turn
it around and that’s bad.

A Splatoon fam, there
was a part of this article

I legit did not
understand. He didn’t have

enough money to buy shares.
He got money and bought

a switch for 40,000 yen
sold it immediately for

25,000 yen and somehow
that got him into the

shareholder meeting.
I was very confused.

as to what that actually
meant. Did he buy a single

share for 25,000 yen? I
shouldn’t have done that.

I should have looked
up the price of a share of

Nintendo. It sounds like
that’s what he did. But if

he had the 40,000 yen, he
could have bought a single

share with the 40,000 yen
and not bought the switch.

Very confused as to what
was going on there. He’s

a Splatoon fan. He
hijacks the meeting because

you’re allowed to ask
questions to the president

stuff. So he’s speaking
to the president of

Nintendo. And what does
he do? He starts complaining

that the male characters
who are I believe called

Inklings about the male
characters treatments

compared to the female
characters treatment in the

game. Like the males
are not treated as well as

the females. The focus
of advertising and stuff

is all on the female
characters, not the male

characters. The male
characters deserve equal time

compared to the females. The Nintendo
president literally scolds him, says,

he says, you have one
minute, you know, make your

point or ask your question.
He’s supposed to be

asking questions. But
he’s not actually asking a

question. He’s just making
complaints. Apparently he

has printouts and like
things to show like charts

and whatnot. He scolds
him for wasting time

because he didn’t really
have a question. His

basic statement was
stop favoring the female

characters in Splatoon.
And then there are a whole

bunch of comments about
this is why you don’t let

gamers into business
stuff. And then they’re all

like, I wouldn’t even
want to work with this guy.

But in a way, this is
the kind of person you’re

taking money from. This
is the kind of person you

should listen to because
if you maybe do what he

says, you’ll make more
money and then number goes

right and up. So maybe
think about that. It

would be weird to be
a fan of his franchise,

have a really passionate
and start making statements.

And then the president
of that company turns

around and says, dude,
do you actually have a point

or a question or do you
have actually have a question?

And you don’t, you have
a point that no one in

that room cares about.
And this is sort of the,

maybe the point where they’re
like saying, read the room.

DIY Bad Idea

(electronic music)

Gotta work today so I don’t have the luxury of

time, but I know you’re hungry for the news,

you’re hungry for what the creepy people in Japan,

do I have it?

Don’t have that many creepy stories today, I’m sorry.

I actually think I need to turn on the light to better see my notes, whatever.

We’re not gonna worry about it, we’re gonna power through, ’cause that’s what we do.

We power through.

So a man decided it would be a good idea.

And whenever I start, a man decided it would be a good idea.

What I’m actually saying, ’cause I do start, I use that phrase a lot.

What I’m actually saying is, what mental process took this person to this point?

So he woke up in the morning, this is always my story.

Whenever we do like a weird crime, weird anything, is they woke up in the morning

and they got to a point in the day where they’re like,

this is a good idea, this is what I’m gonna do today.

So this guy starts calling the police station

on his mobile phone.

And over the course of two days, he calls them 47 times.

And he starts saying things like, the bomb has been completed, very dramatic.

I got a missile.

I’m going to blow up your police station.

So I’m betting, we did,

he claimed to have a homemade missile.

He claimed to have a homemade bomb

that he was going to use to blow up a police station.

Now we had the assassination of former prime minister Abe

last year.

And the guy who assassinated him used a homemade shotgun.

I was blown away at the amount of work

and effort it would take to make a homemade shotgun.

Not only the shotgun, but the ammunition that goes with it.

He had to make the ammunition, he had to make the shotgun and it worked.

That in itself was shocking.

This guy is claiming to not only have a bomb,

but also a missile that he’s going to use

to blow up a police station.

Now you may have noted, I said, he used his own cell phone.

So that’s going to be a pretty significant clue

for the police when they backtrace that phone

to find out who owns it so they can find the guy.

Now here’s the thing.

He was actually arrested a couple days after these phone calls

were made for intimidation, intimidation in a different case using the same phone.

So the police arrest this guy because he’s calling

someone unrelated saying intimidating things.

I’m not sure what.

Find out the phone number is the same as the phone number

that’s been calling the police station, threatening to blow up the police station.

He is now arrested for forcible obstruction of business.

(bell ringing)

(phone ringing)

Paper cranes in Japan, in Japanese culture, symbolize peace.

So burning them sends a different message

and the fire department was called around 6.30 in the morning in a park.

People had been hanging up paper cranes to symbolize peace

and someone else thought, hey, you know what’s a good idea?

Okay, sort of the same deal.

How does your brain get from?

I’m going to get out of bed today.

and set shit on fire that symbolizes peace.

Like it’s just, so I’m always of the mind.

I think the reason I don’t fall into my base or instincts, it may just be laziness.

‘Cause I wake up in the morning and I’m like, I wanna murder everyone I know.

And then I go, that’s a lot of work.

Maybe I should have breakfast.

And then after I have breakfast, I’m fine.

So all those dark thoughts, they’re like way more work

than I’d be willing to put in, maybe, maybe that’s it.

Maybe I’m just too lazy to be a psycho.

Because yeah, if you think about psycho people,

people who do psycho things, put a lot of work in.

Maybe that’s, I don’t know where I’ve gone right.

That it just be, I read a thing that if,

it did make sense, that if we instituted nap time,

it would end war.

Because the idea is that all these people,

they’re all really angry, and then you take a nap in the afternoon,

and no one wants to get up from the nap in the afternoon and actually do war.

I was like, actually, it kinda makes sense.

The problem is people are very upset.

Probably not getting enough sleep, they just need a nap.

And this is on a similar attack that maybe, maybe that effort is the effort.

So if they would just relax and chill out or have a better breakfast, I don’t know.

So the police show up in the park.

It’s 6.30 in the morning.

It’s also like, what time did he get up, get dressed and go to the park?

Five, maybe that’s the problem.

Is you’re waking up so early or in a bad mood.

I certainly am not a morning person.

Not enough of a morning person that I would go set stuff on fire,

but enough of a not of a morning person that I’m very cranky

and rude to my family, which I honestly should apologize for.

The police arrest is 23 year old government employee,

who straight up said, I started the fire.

We didn’t have a reason.

I do, again, I am always disappointed that we don’t get the reasons.

I get they don’t get the confession in the reason right away.

So it’s always like I wanna follow up that these stories like this,

they don’t tend to get a follow up, which is too bad.

Because I would like to always know,

what’s going on in your head that makes you think this is a good idea.

The first man, the man who is threatening to blow up

police stations and making threatening calls

to other people clearly just anger issues.

He’s just an upset, unpleasant, unhappy person.

This guy who’s 23 years old, these government employee,

he had no setting, a bunch of cranes on fire

wasn’t gonna work out for your day, I guess not.

So I have learned about Yemi Baito.

So it would be kind of translated to dark part time job or dark job.

So these are illegal, these are job requests

on social media, pushing, pushing is not right.

Offers of committing crimes.

So a couple of weeks ago there was a story

about three young men who didn’t know each other

who robbed a Rolex store.

And one of them got taken down like beat up and then arrested.

He said he got the job online.

So the watch thief went online, some guy said, “Hey,

I’m putting together a crew to Rob this Rolex store.”

And he like applied for the job and got it and then got arrested.

There seems like a lot of extra steps there.

There’s no, in that case there is no assurance.

that you have any support system.

So I could think of a crime, I’m gonna Rob a Rolex store.

I don’t really need, ’cause they weren’t, this wasn’t like Ocean’s 11

where they’re gonna do some sort of scheme and need people with skills.

They went up to the Rolex store, smashed everything

they could and grabbed what they couldn’t ran away.

And he just didn’t run away fast enough and got caught.

I guess the only legitimate benefit would be

you don’t know the other guys so you can’t rat them out.

I guess?

But still, I would like more assurance in my crew, like more support or value.

I don’t know.

It seems like you’re missing that sort of team element

that you actually want to be successful to work together well.

There was a secondary crime.

There was the man, I think we actually mentioned this one,

a man who robbed a Pokemon store of 1,500 cars.

That job was also posted on social media.

So he came up from Okinawa, took the shinkansen up to Tokyo, robbed this store.

He goes the same day to meet someone and drops off the cards.

The guy says, “Go to this secondary location and you will get paid.”

He goes to the secondary location and no one shows up to pay him.

So again, that would have been my first suspicion

is I’m dealing with people who think crime is acceptable.

Why would they not think that ripping me off was acceptable?

So he had what it was, I think it was one

point something million yen’s worth of cards.

He handed them over and got no money.

Went to a secondary location, didn’t get any

money, didn’t get paid and then he got arrested.

And he probably can’t rat out the guy,

for the guy on the other side of the social media, this is a great scheme.

But I’m gonna offer up these jobs, you do this thing.

I will pay you, make that promise and then just don’t pay them.

This is how crime works.

It’s almost like these guys don’t really get how crime works.

This, or dude, I guess I can’t feel sorry for him.

He had gambling debts, that’s why he was looking for jobs

on the Internet, that’s why he found his job

to Rob Pokemon store and that’s why he did it.

Now the cards were worth 1.15 million yen.

Yeah, I mean, he’s put himself in a bad situation,

he’s committed a crime and then had a weirdly

honor among thieves crime committed on him.

I guess I can’t feel bad for him.

He’s kind of set up his whole life that way but he clearly makes bad decisions.

I was just about to give advice to criminals.

if you’re gonna commit a crime.

Don’t take someone else’s job, take a minute,

sit down think, what can you do, where can you do it and commit your own crime?

Be independent and strong.

Be the strong independent criminal that we all know you can be.

And at least then you’re not gonna rip yourself off.

You’re still gonna get arrested.

’cause let’s face it, these criminals are not good,

they’re not practiced, they don’t think about things.

Again, a secondary reason is to why I would never

end up being a criminal ’cause I would think about,

I know, I’ve thought about and read about crime enough

that I know how many things have to go right for you not to get caught.

And then like let’s say I stole the Pokemon cards.

I wouldn’t know where to fence them.

I’m not in the Pokemon underworld.

I don’t know what to do.

So you have to almost be like established as a criminal to

be a successful criminal established in a certain CD world.

I know I don’t have those connections.

If I came across a bag of diamonds,

it would make no sense for me to keep them ’cause I wouldn’t know how to fence them.

And then as soon as I go find out

it’s gonna be an undercover cop who’s gonna catch me and I’m gonna get in trouble.

The only way I would be successful

would be if I found a bag of money and tried to keep it.

And then immediately my first thought is

can’t spend all the money in the same place at the same time.

So let’s say I have a bag with a million or 10 million in it.

My, I’m not talking about my, I don’t know how to longer money, right?

That’s the problem.

So I have 10 million in a bag.

My thought was I’ll take 10,000 yen out.

I can’t deposit in my bank account,

even just like 10,000 yen ’cause the serial

numbers, they might have the serial numbers.

I can’t spend a large amount of money

because again, it’ll get traced back to the purchase

that I made and I would have to explain that

or where that money came from.

So my thought was over the course of decades, every time I’m in a different area.

So I can’t always use the convenience store

where I work ’cause again, then they’d be like,

well this guy seems to buy stuff at this

convenience store at these regular amounts of times.

So all we have to do is post up a cop and then sooner or later he’ll come

and buy the stuff and we can catch him and talk to him.

So every time I go to a different convenience store, there are cameras though.

So that’s it.

I’m already kind of screwed.

Where can I spend physical cash.

where I’m not recorded on a camera?

Where can I use this money where I’m not gonna get caught?

It just doesn’t work.

So my thought is wait like a decade.

So I have to wait for years and years and years

and then every time I go to a convenience store I use a different 10,000 yen bill

but it has to be a different convenience store every time.

Even with the camera footage, if it was busy, maybe I could get away with it

but they would probably be able to tell the person

using 10,000 yen ’cause they see the person hand out to change to me.

So I’m already starting to see flaws in my incredibly

simple plan where I didn’t commit an initial crime.

I just found money.

How can I keep that money?

Where you use that money or longer that money?

I can’t.

Unless I can find a place with no cameras and then use a bunch of it at one time

but then again, you can’t do 10,000,000 yen at one time.

Yeah, I’m already like seeing so much failure in this possible plan that I have.

which is the lowest level of crime possible.

It doesn’t work out.

(phone ringing)

This is an explanation of why the world is doomed.

Toyota is a company.

I was very annoyed by this.

I actually may never buy a Toyota car because of this.

They invented the Prius, which is probably the most famous sort of first electric car.

Maybe Tesla’s more famous now, but everyone knows the name Prius

because it was one of the first electric vehicles.

But behind the scenes, Toyota was lobbying to keep internal combustion engines going.

They have recently sort of made their plans.

And what they’re saying is we’re gonna have

multiple avenues of ways towards green technology.

So what they wanna do is have the internal combustion engine.

So gas, they wanna have hybrid, so gas plus electric.

They wanna have electric and they wanna have hydrogen cars.

Japan’s really still stuck on hydrogen

and the rest of the world hasn’t gone that way, which is tough.

I agree with this philosophically if I didn’t know the truth.

And the truth is what they’re trying to do is keep the internal combustion engine

’cause that’s the most profitable one for them.

This is obviously gonna be backed by gas companies and whatever.

Toyota has been accused of trying to keep

the internal combustion engine as opposed to pushing

towards more green and cleaner technologies.

The current aim is technically supposed to be zero emissions by 2050.

And then they made their announcements.

Toyota shareholders rejected plans to better fight climate change.

So Toyota was essentially celebrated by its shareholders.

for making the world a shittier, more dangerous,

more likely to implode place.

This one of the executives said, what is important

is to better convey our efforts to shareholders.

And that was the sentence they got it.

Shareholders will always grab the short-term profit because that’s what profits them.

They are not thinking long-term.

They are not thinking sustainability.

They’re thinking number goes up.

Number that’s the only thing that matters.

I have been recently shocked that companies,

like giant gas companies and companies like Toyota,

don’t transition more smoothly.

We, I did a C-MIG-B last time was a list of technologies

or jobs or industries that don’t exist anymore.

Like the knocker upper was a great, just a

phrase ’cause we use that phrase differently now.

And that was someone who comes to your door

and knocks on your door at a certain time to get you out of bed.

And that was replaced by the alarm clock.

So you have this gas company,

giant corporation like BP, British, petrol.

They knew in the ’70s that fossil fuel was not sustainable over the long term,

but they’re like, well, we’re just gonna forge ahead.

It would have made sense to me.

I’ve done an executive member of BP is like, let’s maintain our gas corporation

but create a secondary BE, so British electric,

and start working on solar panels, start working on

secondary technologies, ’cause we know that this won’t last.

We’ve done the research.

We’ve seen that in X amount of years, even if it’s 50, 60 years away,

that the business model we have now is not sustainable.

So if we start transitioning now and we can be the first to do solar panels,

we can be the first to do hybrid and slowly transition.

When our original business model starts to fail,

we have a new business model in place to dominate the market.

How companies aren’t thinking that way is shocking to me.

So oil and gas companies, not being the first ones

to develop fossil, non-fossil fuel alternatives.

I’m like, how are you letting other companies take over?

Because when fossil fuels run out, your industry is gone.

I mean, that’s just, you know that.

They knew this.

They actually said this back in the ’70s.

I mean, let’s not even talk about climate change.

Let’s talk about self-interest.

The fact that you know that your business will die at some point.

Why would you not put steps into place?

So keep making all your money now,

just take a little bit of that money to make

a new business that goes along with yours.

And then as the fossil fuels run out,

you start to like ramp up the alternative energy collection.

And then your number one for fossil fuels and number one for alternative energy.

And as that transition happens, you remain number one in both.

Be like, you know what?

All the people who worked for us in gas and oil,

we’re gonna move you over to installing solar panels

so people don’t even lose their jobs or not as many

when your entire corporation collapses and goes bankrupt.

So this is the same thing.

So Yoda saying we want multiple avenues.

I actually think technically that would be a good idea

if you were doing it like we’re going to move

away from this thing that we know is dying out

and go towards something that will be a more sustainable future.

The shareholders going, yeah, fuck the environment.

If I make 20 bucks, that’s why shareholders should not be allowed to make decisions.

And yet that’s how corporations are built nowadays, which is why we’re all going die.

(upbeat music).

This was weirdly inspirational, but again, it all goes to shit pretty quick.

There’s some people, they’re like trying to get you to vote for a certain politician.

They come to your house.

This is pretty calm across the world.

Knock on this woman’s door, she’s a police officer.

And they say, oh, you know, we would like you to vote for this politician.

And just thank you for your time.

Here’s two loaves of bread worth about a thousand yen, seven dollars.

And I was like, holy shit.

Some expensive bread.

It’s really nice bread they gave off over there.

Then later, this police officer woman with some sort of integrity goes,

I actually accepted essentially a political

contribution which could be construed as a bride.

I’m gonna go to my immediate supervisor

and tell him about this present that I received.

And go like, look, I think I accidentally accepted a bride.

So, you know, I think we should report that

and make it very clear.

And then she was referred to prosecutors.

And she should be lauded for recognizing she

did something when we were bringing forth.

But she goes, honest cops are a problem.

So, like, I think a normal person would have

gone like, oh, shit, I accidentally took a bribe

or I took this thing and this could be construed as a bribe.

So, what I’m gonna do, she’s not telling anybody

you need the bread.

So, hide the evidence in the most delicious way possible.

And this police officer’s like, well, that would be dishonest.

I’m gonna go report this, be the best police officer

that I can be self-report, which is something we want

police to do all over the world and they never do.

And then what happens?

She gets sent to the prosecutor.

Now, again, the prosecutors might go, well, you

know, let’s take everything into consideration.

You were honest about it.

You made a mistake, you were honest about it.

You brought it to our attention.

We’re not gonna do anything.

Although, because it’s an open and shut case, I bet they just go through with it

because then it’s like a dick on that, like dick.

It’s a Freudian slip of some sort.

That’s like a dick on their board.

Like we have one more case that we’ve won.

So, I’m really disappointed with how this is all being

handled ’cause I would be like, she made a mistake,

maybe paid the $7 back and then apologized.

But I think we have one of the most honest

cops in the world just standing in front of us.

Maybe we should encourage her to keep doing that.

It’s a total side story since I got, I’ve run out of stories.

I once accidentally bribed a border guard when I was going into Korea.

So, I was in Ireland and I bought six bottles of whiskey

’cause I was like, I’ll have to give it to friends, I’ll have to give it to family.

I’m gonna join a judo club, I give it to the judo teacher.

I bought non-export, coal-rained whiskey.

And this is really just bush mills, but it’s the local stuff that they don’t export.

So, I was going to carry this stuff that had never been outside the country.

I mean, someone else has done the exact same thing.

But the idea is that I’m gonna take this non-export and

bring it with me somewhere and use it as presence and gives.

So, I think I had six bottles.

And then I was at the passport control

and I had to like, do you have anything to declare?

And I was like, oh, it says you can only bring

four bottles of alcohol into the country.

So, I thought, maybe I have to pay some taxes, but you know, it’s worth it.

So, I go up to the guy and he says, do you have anything to declare?

And I was like, yes, I have six bottles of whiskey and I took one out as an example

and I put it on the table.

And the man looked at me, took the bottle of whiskey,

and David was just being so sexy in the background.

Took the bottle of whiskey, put it down under the table and said, go ahead.

And that was it.

And then I walked out and I was like, oh shit,

I think I just accidentally bribe that guy.

‘Cause my intent was to show him the product

so that he could, you know, better assess it

so that he could better assess it.

So, he could charge me appropriately because it wasn’t like

the most expensive, highest end whiskey, but, you know,

it was not an export out of an off-thirst being issue with that.

So, I was like, oh, I’ll pay some one, whatever.

I have no problem with that ’cause it’s, or maybe you just

take two bottles away and that’s all I get, whatever, fine.

And then he took one, so I brought in five.

I lost one, which I guess was kind of my tax,

but I’m pretty sure that never went into the system.

I think that man just took that home.

So, accidental crimes are very much a thing and it’s very much possible.

Please be careful.

Now we should say thank you to that cop.

(upbeat music)

(upbeat music).


The Pale Ghost of Nagoya

(electronic music)

The Sakurai SoulKey, Crime Family Organization, is based in Shizuoka.

Due to a loss of membership, lower accrute, (imitates gun)


I thought I was gonna be able to do one with zero edits.

I was, that was kind of my goal.

I had a personal goal today.

Do an episode of Ninja Ninja Japan

and not have to edit it at the end of the day, impossible.

Due to low recruitment numbers and falling profits,

they ran mostly illegal street vending stalls,

which didn’t seem like the most, the best criminal,

so when I think of Yakusa and criminal families and stuff,

I think drug dealing, prostitution, murder, you know, maybe movie stuff,

street vending doesn’t seem like the way to build a criminal empire.

Wow, what do I know?

I don’t know.

‘Cause I’m not part of a criminal family, maybe that’s awesome, but apparently not,

because they, as a criminal organization, have decided to disband.

The president of the organization, or someone representing the organization,

went to the police for a dissolution notification submission

ceremony, which is something I desperately wanna see.

What is it?

So your head of a Yakusa family, and you go to the

police and say, “We are not a Yakusa family anymore?”

My first thought, like, is it a, like is it

a, okay, ’cause they even call it a ceremony.

Is it a ceremony?

Do they have like a dinner with the cops and they like, you know, hang out?

But my first thought was, I’m running a criminal’s organization.

I go to the police, I declare my criminal organization

disbanded and then we can do more crime with less scrutiny.

It seems the police chief, I don’t know if he’s rumored in,

he’s like, I hope you become a more sensible member

of society, which is kind of a bullshit thing to say from being honest.

So I, this is the first I’ve heard of, this is a thing.

So I’ve lived in Japan like 20 years now, and I’ve never heard of this before.

So I was really interested in this.

I can’t get any details.

It’s some kind of like secret ceremony between the,

the police and the Yakusa seem to have a very odd relationship anyways.

They, they seem to know about each other and

organize with each other and almost work together.

And then, you know, then there are crack downs and stuff.

I don’t know.

The crime rate in Japan peaked in 2002.

So crime has been going down steadily since 2002.

In 2002, they had 2.73 million criminal cases.

In 2021, there were 568,148 criminal cases.

That is 25, that is 21% of the peak.

So crime has dropped so much that we are now at 21%

of the crimes being committed annually as in 2002.

2002, just quite incidentally, is the year after I came to Japan.

So I mean, if someone could say there’s a correlation

causation kind of thing, I mean, if someone who is pale

is the moon, you know, stalked the streets at night,

punishing criminals to the point where they feared the ghost of Nagoya.

I mean, if that was the thing that happened

and drove down the crime rate, I mean, that person,

surely they should be thanked, but maybe because they live

a masked crime fighting lifestyle, you wouldn’t know who they are essentially.

I mean, it would be someone who knew a lot about stories

in the news and what was going on in the streets,

maybe even took time out as a hobby to report it to you.

If that kind of person existed, I mean, it might be worth saying thank you to them.

I’m certainly no superhero, and if I was,

I wouldn’t admit it because then that would

just give the criminals a target to go after.

So keeping that secret identity secret is very important to me.

But if, you know, on behalf of the ghost of the night,

the palest superhero that ever lived, you’re welcome.

I mean, if I knew him, and I knew what he would want

to say to the people, by reducing the crime

rate from 100% down to 21, I mean, I think a,

a thank you’s in order from everyone in the

country, but you’re welcome is also there.

Japan’s hydrogen efforts, they want a sixfold increase

over the next 15 years aimed at decarbonization.

They are looking for more hydrogen cars on the street by 2030.

They’re aiming for zero greenhouse gas emissions by 2050.

There is sort of an issue with hydrogen,

I learned a couple of years ago, is that the hydrogen production.

So it says in the story, it says they are partnering

with Australia and other in some countries in the Middle East

to produce hydrogen because hydrogen, it’s very hard to get.

That’s the problem, but it is very effective.

It’s much more explosive, so it’s a little more dangerous to handle.

But what I learned is that to produce hydrogen in Australia, they use coal.

So they have a coal plant, produce the hydrogen,

ship the hydrogen in a big boat over to Japan.

So they produce zero emissions in Japan.

But if they produce the emissions on the boat

and in Australia, is that really zero carbon emissions?

That’s one of the problems of kind of the zero carbon

conversation because they talk about it in country.

But if the country is doing stuff outside of

country to get the hydrogen into the country,

then they’re not really zero greenhouse gases, aren’t they?

And so this is why I’m a little disappointed, because I think, again,

the intent is correct, but the efforts, the reality, isn’t quite there.

Will hydrogen catch on?

It doesn’t seem to have caught on anywhere else.

Japan, as a country, is still very, very pro-hydrogen.

They really want to make this work.

I mean, Japan has been referred to as the

Galapagos, several times and several things.

One of the things I noticed, so I came to Japan.

My sister had been here before, so this would have been the late ’90s early 2000.

They had mini-disc.

Now, in the West, we had cassette tapes, and it moved to CD.

And then it moved to MP3 after that.

In Japan, kind of only Japan, they had mini-disc,

which was like a hard, floppy disc, that had more capacity

than a cassette tape, but less capacity than a CD, I think.

But the fidelity was good.

It was basically an MP3 player.

But you could had to swap out little drives.

And that was only in Japan.

And so that kind of Galapagos feeling

means that something can be successful in

Japan, and not even get picked up anywhere else.

So maybe Japan will be the land of hydrogen cars.

Maybe not.

I have no idea.

It’ll be interesting to see what happens, because the world isn’t going that way.

Does Japan sort of stay course and keep doing the thing they’re doing?

It’s a very Japanese thing to do.

Or did they give in and join the rest of the world?

I don’t know what’s going to happen.

Gassy is– he was arrested last week, and I kind of didn’t want to talk about him.

It’s not that I didn’t want to talk about him.

When they arrested him, they didn’t say anything

particularly interesting about the arrest.

So there were no details.

He was arrested for intimidation, specifically of celebrity.

So I don’t know if that made it more of a case.

Because intimidating people should just be intimidating people.

Intimidating celebrities shouldn’t matter.

Shouldn’t make a difference.

But what I did find out is he made 100 million yen from his YouTube videos.

And let me just check.

I have made zero yen from my YouTube video.

So I’m following a little behind Gassy in the YouTube Finance area.

He had 100 million yen.

He was trying to move it around.

So he had multiple bank accounts.

He had, like in his parents’ bank accounts and

stuff like that, trying to hide it essentially.

So he didn’t want to pay taxes.

Or there was some sassy stuff going on with his 100 million yen.

Should I ever get 100 million yen from YouTube,

I will be very forthcoming and honest about what I do with it.

Because my lifestyle is very dull.

I will probably just put it in the bank and live the exact same life I live now.

I would probably quit my job.

And then just make videos and stuff all the time.

I don’t know.

Or I’d become a complete douche.

Who knows?

He admitted during questioning that in his videos,

he would expose everything a celebrity did.

But at the same time, he thought saying I will expose the most

private details of a famous person’s life was not criminal.

In Japan, a very privacy-oriented country, I think you would know that is criminal.

You know how in videos in America, they’re always like,

they took a picture of me without my permission.

You can’t do that.

And then the cops are like, well, actually,

if you’re in public, it’s perfectly acceptable.

In Japan, it’s not.

You actually can’t take pictures of people without their permission.

So if I take a picture, and there’s a whole bunch of people in the background,

technically I should get all their permission.

I think realistically, well, no, the reality.

That’s not really going to happen.

But if I wanted to put that picture online, I should blur out all their faces.

So you’ll see comic-con things and other pictures of groups.

And they’ve actually taken the time to cover out the faces.

Legally, they should be doing that.

I don’t think it happens all the time.

But again, there’s the reality.

And I think if I was pointedly taking picture of an individual,

they would actually have a criminal case against me.

A juvenile.

I didn’t show it.

I haven’t used the word juvenile.

I’m getting old.

I think I could start calling people juvenile.

Like just as young juvenile, you should–

I don’t have any of you follow up with that.

A juvenile was smoking in front of a convenient store.

And the police approaching their car.

He sees the cops.

He’s like, going to Scarper.

Here’s a British phrase for anyone in my audience who’s from the UK.

You’ll enjoy the very Canadian accent usage of the word Scarper.

So he did a Scarper.

The cops turn on the reds, and they start chasing him in a car.

Like, I’m already in my– Mr. Worm has jumped saying he goes, he lagged it.

So I’m trying to decide, should I do my Dick Van Dyke horrendous British accents?

Or should I just stick with the North American accent

that I have that is natural for me and do British phrases?

It’s actually a thing that was rattling around the back of my head for some reason.

Because if I did slang from another country

and did not put on the accent, it would be funnier and weirder.

Like, good day, mate.

There’s my Aussie.

And don’t do the accent.

So Mr. Worm has put in the– I’ll have to revamp.

Let’s start again.

A juvenile was smoking in front of a convenience

store, the police approach, and he lagged it.

The cops chased after him in a car.

I always thought that was a bit extreme.

Why are you chasing a kid who’s running in a car?

There’s actually a few downsides of that, but we’ll get to those in a second.

Kid jumps offence.

Perfect strategy.

I’m almost on the kids’ side, especially because I know the end of the story.

The cops start, turn off the siren, and they’re patrolling around.

They’re going to hunt down this kid.

This is what they do.

This is the problem with the white shadow,

the ghost of Nagoya, having brought the crime rate down

so low as the police have nothing to do, but chase kids who

were smoking a cigarette for the first time in their life.

So again, I don’t know who the pale ghost of Nagoya is.

I think maybe he has to work on his superhero name,

but he does apologize that the crime rate is so

low that the cops are doing this kind of stuff,

because I can tell you, the pale ghost of Nagoya

superhero would not waste his time chasing down a kid who was smoking a cigarette.

I might talk to him, be like, hey, you know, smoking?

Not cool.

So the cops turn off the lights.

They’re driving around.

They’re hunting for this juvenile delinquent.

They go down a one-way road the wrong way.

They see the kid somewhere up, maybe at the other side.

There’s an intersection.

They race after him, blare out into the street, and hit a car.

Three people are injured, a mother, a seven-year-old, and a one-year-old.

Now, please remember, this crashes the result of

them chasing a kid who was smoking a cigarette.

So the young scallywag, smoking the cigarette, I would say it’s not worth it.

I didn’t believe that it’s just it.

It’s not worth the risk of injuring other

people, because they didn’t have their lights on.

The car was just driving normally.

They booked it after this kid.

And then they smashed into a car.

The seven-year-old was hurt really badly.

So I’m assuming that one-year-old was in one of those

child seats that was really secure, and maybe just bounced around.

But the seven-year-old was just sitting like a normal seven-year-old.

He was hurt quite badly.

The I.G. police say that cops did not violate the law in the pursuit.

So driving up the wrong way of a one-way street is not a violation of the law.

Having their lights off while in pursuit is not a violation of the law.

I think maybe they need to find another way to spend their time

than chasing after a young scally-wag puffing on a fake.

Someone’s going to get upset that I said that word.

Even though I am, again, using British slang, that actually is the risk.

If I say that with an American accent, it does not come across as slang at all.

And therefore, I am just using a slur.

It is, I believe, pride month.

I’m very supportive.

I’m not going to show– [INAUDIBLE]

That’s– I support gay people and rights and equality.

I also support the right for me to not show my penis

to my friend who’s claimed that it is the wrong thing for me to do.

All right, so a while ago, a couple months ago,

sort of near the end of the corona pandemic,

there was a group of people selling corona super eggs.

So there were eggs you eat.

There were like 10,000 yen and egg or something stupid like that.

It was a pyramid scheme, multi-level market, and kind of deal.

I’ll sell you eggs, you sell the eggs, you sell the eggs.

And then the guys at the top made a ton of money off these essentially magic eggs.

Well, they’re not the only ones who thought to get on the scam train.

A Tokyo-based company sold water with medicinal properties in quotes.

And now the thing is, water does have medicinal properties.

Hydration is important.

If you don’t hydrate, you need to be hydrated.

Therefore, it is medicinal to hydrate yourself.

So you could, in the most technical sense, say that they didn’t lie.

I don’t think that’s true.

They were saying that the water is effective against influenza.

It would kill 99.9% of the influenza virus in your body.

In one minute, the company was called the Superl–

the company was called the Supermineral Research Institute.

Now, I don’t know why, but as soon as they said Superl, I’m like, it’s a scam.

If you said these are vitamins, I would go, OK, let’s take a look at the vitamins.

If you said these are super healthy vitamins, I’d be like, it sounds like a scam.

I think the use of the word super might be a scam indicator.

So be careful of that.

So a two-liter bottle of water costs 10,000 yen, which is insane.

The company made 430 million yen in five years.

So they were selling two-liter bottles of regular water for 10,000 yen.

It’s probably like $100 American.

And people were buying it year after year after year, no one sort of caught on.

So please be careful of anything with super in the title.

That’s claiming to be good.

So there’s acid.

He super dry the beer.

It’s just beer.

It’s saying it’s super beer, and it’ll get you super drunk.

That’s true if you drink enough of it.

The super healthy stuff, be careful of that.

Sushi dough.

So we had the Sushi terrorism kind of swept the nation.

The kid who licked the soy sauce bottle, the Sushi dough corporation came after him.

So they have decided to sue the family.

I said that it was tough, because how much do you

sue a family for Japan’s not particularly litigious,

but they’re like, we have to set an example of

someone so that people don’t keep doing this.

People keep doing this.

It’s going to destroy our company.

They are going after $67 million yen, which is $480,000.

So a kid, teen, went in with his friends, licked a soy sauce bottle, put it back.

Their friends video that put it on the Internet, it caused the stock price to crash.

I think it was– they said like $9 billion yen in stock value was lost.

It caused an incredible decrease in customers.

That’s actually the next part.

The video went out.

There was a sharp falling customers.

Oh, so I wrote it down.

$16 billion yen stock drop.

They had to install plastic sheets, like plastic

covers, to cover the Sushi that was on rotation.

That had a cost of $90 million yen,

because they had to do it at 600 different outlets.

So Sushi are going after this kid.

They’re not going after $16 billion yen.

They’re not going after the $90 million yen.

They’re going after $67 million.

I don’t know how they exactly came to that number,

but they were trying to get something, I think, just to prove a point.

The defense team for this kid is saying

that the video was for sharing amongst friends

and therefore is not causative to the drop in stock price and the drop in customers.

That is a pretty weak defense, because that’s

like saying, I didn’t intend to murder him.

I just pointed the gun and pulled the trigger.

The fact that the bullet hit him in the head, that sort of just happened stance.

And therefore, I shouldn’t be held responsible.

So the fact that they didn’t intend for the video

to be put online, but the thing is, I think,

is friends didn’t tend it, because they posted it online.

Because things going online is not accidental.

So someone had to purposely post it to, I think it was probably TikTok or Twitter.

Someone did that on purpose.

There’s multiple steps you go through to upload a video.

So I think the counter-argument to that is, yes, you did.

So the defense team’s claim is there’s no causal

relationship between the video and the drop in customers.

It could have been stiff competition.

The problem is, the competitors suffered the same

drop, even though they weren’t the initial victims.

So that argument also falls apart.

I’m not a prosecuting attorney.

But if this is the quality of the defense teams,

I think I have a chance to be a really good prosecuting attorney in Japan.

Yamunashi is a prefecture in Japan.

They are declaring a state of emergency because of population decrease.

This is the first state of emergency declared because of a population decline.

Back in 2000, there were 895,646 people in Yamunashi.

And in 2022, last year, there were 796,231 people.

That is a 100,000-person drop.

The fertility rate in that area is 1.40.

The target is 1.87.

You actually need a 2.01, like a 2.0-point

plus, to be able to maintain your population.

That’s not even a population increase.

You are basically– you make two babies to replace the two parents.

That will maintain population.

The problem is, some kids die.

So you need 2.0-something to be able to actually

maintain the population, not even increase it.

You need a 2.5 or something like that, to actually increase the population over time.

I’m wondering what this is going to lead to.

They’re saying they’re going to– if you’re worried about having kids,

we’ll have government stuff to help you with children.

I was wondering if they’re actually going to go with mandated sex, because they are.

I might be moving to Yamunashi.

That one wants my seed.

All right, last story.


An online pawn shop.

I didn’t know online pawn shops were a thing.

But you can contact pawn shops on a Zoom meeting and say, hey, here’s my bottle cap.

Let’s do an assessment of the value of that bottle cap

and then decide whether I should sell it or not, sell it with your company.

So they do, basically, appraisals online.

This guy gets online.

He says, I want you to appraise my watch.

He holds a watch up the camera.

The lady looks at it.

He says, well, it’s maybe worth 10,000 yen or 100,000 yen or it looks like that.

That’s a great watch.

It’s worth a million yen.

And they have a little conversation.

He goes, great.

Next is this.

And then he shows them her dick.

Da, fuck to the sense.

Then he shows her his dick.

I guess I shouldn’t be gendering people.

But the guy with the dick was targeting women.

So there actually, that sentence can be gendered properly.

That’s something I used to never worry about getting right.

Now I actually have to think about it.

That’s not a bad thing.

So basically, he would try to fake them out, look at my watch, assess my watch.

And now, so my question– my question has always come hard and fast.

Did he stand up and pull down his pants for the camera,

or did he move the camera down to his exposed area?

Is actually the question I have.

The women, of course, this is sexual assault.

Sexual assault is not a joke, but the women did miss an opportunity for a joke,

because they could have appraised his penis.

They could have given it a really harsh realistic appraisal.

They could have been, you know, well, the girth

isn’t really what it could be, the length.

While average is not particularly impressive,

and therefore won’t garner you any sum of money

beyond the standard sum of money, does it do any tricks?

Something like that.

Like, she could have– do you have the original papers?

Anything, if they had done– it’d not been shocked.

I know it’s impossible.


And I do actually feel bad for these women.

But all I need is this one cold-hearted woman to the guy moves the camera down,

and you’re looking at his like weird-looking penis,

and she just starts appraising it correctly.

Would have been devastating and stopped him.

He was arrested pretty quickly, because he’d done this

like three or four times, and they sort of had his information to a degree.

And he was arrested, and he said he got off on the shocked look on the women’s faces.

We’ll see how that helps them hold up in prison.

In Japan, he’s probably not going to prison.

He’s probably just going to get a fine.

If he’s found guilty, it’s just too bad.

But if you would like your penis appraised, send a picture to– I shouldn’t do that.

Someone would actually send me a dick pick.

I don’t want your dick pick.

And if I say anything to the gender I am

attracted to, no, I’m committing sexual assault.

So let’s just end that there.

Don’t send noods to anyone.

I have no conclusion after that.

I should have planned out something.

I had the idea in my head of the appraising penis.

Next time, it should something like this come up again.

I’ll actually plan out a penis appraisal.

That is my promise to you.

That, and I am not the pale ghost of Nagoya.



Booger kids don’t die


Ah, do a level good science story, especially

when they justify me spitting into children’s mouths.

So there’s the opening of the podcast.

You weren’t into that.

But it gets better.

I mean, we gotta go through this whole story,

and then it gets better, and then it gets worse.

But in a fun way.

That’s what we all were here for.

We’re here for the fun science, spitting in

kids’ mouths, and you’re maybe like, “Hey, don’t spit in that baby’s mouth.”

But you actually might solve a lot of their

skin problems in the future, because bacteria,

so a Japanese university has found that bacteria

from a parent’s saliva stimulates the infant’s

immune system, leading to allergy prevention in the future.

So I, if you’ve listened to this podcast for any

amount of time, suffer greatly from allergies.

You actually have two allergy stories today.

I suffer from allergies, and that’s problematic.

I’m always on drugs.

I’m always doing stuff to try to take care of my allergies, allergies, allergies.

When I produce this podcast, one of the issues

is I sniff, cough, and make gurgly sounds.

Those are bad.

If my mom had been a good mom and spitting my

mouth as a baby, maybe I wouldn’t have those problems.

If the parent, it’s not as gross as spitting in

the kids’ mouth, because there’s no scientific

study that would work, because in your survey,

if you said, “Did you spit in your kids’

mouth, everyone would put no even if they did.”

So the actual science will stop with the spitting in the mouth joke.

Big pause, so you can wonder if it’s really a joke.

If you shared eating utensils, so I take a

bite off my chopsticks since we’re in Japan,

and I take those chopsticks and I feed my

child, and I feed myself, and I feed my child, a 48% drop in skin issues.

If… Now this is actually almost as gross as spitting the…

So this is the one I was in trouble.

If the parent primes a pacifier by putting it

in their mouth, and then puts it in the baby’s

mouth, 65% drop in skin issues and allergies.

I never would have thought to put my baby’s

pacifier in my mouth, primarily because it was

in my baby’s mouth, and I’m like, “It’s gross and wet.

I’m not going to put that in my mouth.”

Perhaps it would have stimulated me.

There is an issue though.

You got to be careful.

You can’t do this for too long because there

is bacteria in an adult’s mouth that will stimulate cavities.

So, you have to… You can do it while the baby…

They really want you to do it while the baby has no teeth.

Once the baby has teeth come in, you kind of

have to stop because then you’re at risking

an increase in cavities, which is like a bacteria

that can get into the gums and into the teeth that cause problems later.

So if we’re being 100% serious, it is good

to eat food with my chopsticks and then feed my baby with those chopsticks.

It is okay to prime a pacifier which I probably

wouldn’t do anyway, so it just feels like a bit too much.

Another gross piece of science that I know is

that it’s actually not a bad thing for kids

to pick their nose and eat it because it’s

a very safe way of introducing small amounts

of bacteria into the stomach, which stimulates the immune system the same way.

So the scientists were actually quite smart

because they weren’t saying like, “We’re never

going to make picking your nose and eating it socially acceptable.”

But we could teach kids that if they’re on their own

and it’s private and they do it, it’s not a bad thing.

And that might be… A lot of science I learn is gross stuff that

we should be doing to improve our lives.

But our social mores have put us in a position where it’s not a good thing to do.

So that’s where we end up.

You don’t do the things that actually might benefit us in the future.

You can’t tell me book aren’t readers having a minute advantage.

Jade, I’m sorry to have to tell you this,

but those little booger kids, they don’t die.

They don’t get sick.

Have you ever noticed the kids, the really

gross kids, the dirty kids, the kids who like scoop eat?

Oh, that’s the worst one.

They get… It’s the up, down, in.

That’s a smooth motion of someone who’s picked their nose their whole life.

Those kids never get sick.

Like all the clean kids were very fragile.

All the Japanese kids who wash their hands all

the time, they all have lots of allergy issues.

The kids who play in dirt eat their boogers

and like spit up in the air and catch it, they never get sick.

So I’m sorry to have to tell you this.

Not only does science say it, my non-scientific

study of disgusting children also proves it

because when I’m teaching kids classes, the gross kids always show up.

Now part of my brain goes, that’s because the

parents want them out of the house, but the

other part of my brain goes, it’s because they never get sick.

They never get to disease.

They’re nothing ever goes wrong in there.

And they glide through life with this gross lifestyle, harder than the rest of us.

So if I’ve been a grosser kid, I might not

be suffering from the allergies I suffer with right now.

Second allergy story.

Japan wants to have the pollen count in 30 years.

So when I’m 81, I’ll probably be dead by then.

When I’m 81, Japan will have got its pollen policies under control.

Never too late to start eating those, I guess.

Never too late.

Well because it has to be during the developmental part of your life.

So now if I start eating my boogers, because I just

put in the chat, never too late to start eating your boogers, I guess.

It is.

Because if I start doing it now, it won’t

stimulate my immune system and its development.

So now it is too late to start eating my boogers.

Now I’m just gross.

If I did it when I was a kid, there would be

sort of an evolutionary advantage of stimulating

my system and growing it into a stronger system.

Now it’s all set.

I’m useless.

I’m dying.

I’m old.

I’m going to crash.

The burning is going to hurt more when I crash and burn.

It hurts already.


After World War II, everything in Japan was burnt.

Japanese season allergies hit different.

It’s like a freight train that’s correct.

That is exactly the story I’m doing now.

The end of World War II, all the trees were

cut down because they needed to rebuild stuff

and then they’re like, “Oh shit, we don’t have trees.”

We need something that grows fast and Hardy and they got cedar trees and imported them.

That’s always a problem.

Importing a non-indigenous plant or animal to a country, but that’s always a problem.

So, what do we end up with?

Cedar trees.

Non-native to Japan.

50% of Tokyo, I’ve said this a billion times.

50% of Tokyo is allergic to cedar.

I suffer from dust, pollen, everything.

The thing that pisses me off, dust is inside my house.

I’m allergic to that.

I go outside, I’m allergic to pollen.

I’m allergic to inside and outside.

I really wish I’d eaten a lot more boogers when I was a kid.

So they’re like, “Okay, this is gone beyond some people have allergies.

50% of Tokyo is less productive for part of the year.

They’re spending tons of money on allergy medicine.

I mean, there’s a good point.

I’m now on, I guess, version two of my allergy medicine and it’s way better.

Now I can take it without water.

It’s funny because the guy’s like, “Oh, it’s a new version.

You don’t need to take it with water anymore.

It’ll just dissolve in your mouth.”

I’m like, “Of my problems, swallowing a pill is on very low on the list.”

But they’re going to start to cut down all those cedar trees.

There are 4.31 million hectares that they want

to replace with less pollen producing trees.

So just in the next 30 years, they’re going to

be just like tearing down all the cedar trees they can and I cannot wait.

I would volunteer at this point to assist because I’m sure the cedar is bad for me.

I mean, I’m allergic to rice, pollen as well.

My body’s useless.

I’m just allergic to everything.

This is why I don’t go outside.

That’s a lot of wood.

That’s what she said.


Yeah, rice pollen is a thing.

So I’m allergic to rice.

I’m allergic to pollen and rice pollen is pretty heavy seasonally in Japan.

So that hits me pretty hard.

But we’re off allergies and spinning in baby’s mouths.

Yeah, the plant.

But of course, I live in the countryside.

No, no, no, the grain is good.

I eat rice just food.

I don’t really seem to have any allergies to.

There is a game weirdly personal.

Sweet and sour pork.

I ate for years and years and years and years

and then suddenly sweet and sour pork two hours later I will vomit.

I think it’s the bamboo.

So what I don’t want to do is actually test to find out what is making me throw up.

But it seems like I can eat pork.

I can eat pineapples.

Is it the sauce?

And then in the ones I usually get, it has like bamboo shoots.

And I think maybe I might be allergic to bamboo shoots in a really violent way.

I don’t know.

No, no, no.

Kishita’s son.

Kishita, Prime Minister of Japan, has a son.

Total nepo baby.

And that’s a phrase I’ve never used until today.

I’ve been reading on the Internet about actors and stuff.

Johnny Depp has a daughter and everyone’s calling her nepo baby.

I don’t know.

She’s talented and not.

I mean, let’s face it.

If you want it, I have always wanted to write books and be creative and stuff.

I have no connections.

I remember writing a book and then finding

out you need like a literary agent and I just don’t know how to get one.

So I’m like, okay, well, I’m in the Internet age at this point.

I’m just going to put stuff on the Internet.

But I’m not jealous of nepo babies.

I just, I just like, I honestly think if I had the opportunity, I would take it.

So I’m not.

Yeah, I don’t condemn them for being nepo babies.

Prime Minister, I don’t know if that’s a different situation.

I feel like Kishita’s son getting a leg up in politics.

This Japan, Japan is very sort of legacy oriented.

Anyways, they went to Paris like last year and

then he was told to go around and take pictures.

And he took official pictures and tourist photos

at the same time, which I actually thought was just an efficient way to do things.

And they got angry at him for taking personal

photos while he was supposed to be doing like professional work.

I thought that was a bit bullshit.

He then got in trouble for having a party at

the Prime Minister’s residence with relatives at New Year’s.

And he was thinking so, so like it was pandemic time still.

So like it’s been downgraded since then.

This was back in December.

He shouldn’t be having parties and gatherings and stuff.

It was family came to the Prime Minister’s residence.

I’m sure they were all vaccinated.

I’m sure they were all actually safe.

No one seems to have got coronavirus.

If they did it the right way, I personally don’t have problem with it.

He’s been fired though because of this.

So he’s going to not get any retirement allowance

and he’s not going to get a bonus this year.

I guess if you get it fired, you don’t get your bonus.

But then of course we read CEO stories.

They get fired and make still get their bonus.

I thought a bonus was supposed to be because you did a good job.

It does seem that in reality, if you’re in a certain

tier of position, you get a bonus because you exist.

Not because you did a good job because you got fired.

I don’t think you should get a bonus.

There have been several Card theft stories over the last few months.

I haven’t been doing them because they don’t say much.

It’s like people break into a card collecting store.

They steal a bunch of cards.

It’s not a very interesting story.

In this case, it’s not better.

It’s nerd stuff.

So this is a 25 year old.

He breaks into a store.

He causes 2.2 million yen worth of damage.

He stole 74 rare cards and 20,000 yen cash.

That’s a secondary crime of opportunity.

Which I’m like, if you’re going to commit a

crime, crimes of opportunities might as well why not?

You’re going to get in trouble and get in trouble.

He was caught and he was told he sold the cards

already and he is admitted to other theft.

It just got me thinking about nerd crime might

be the way to describe it because you have

to be a nerd to know the value of the cards.

If you put me in a Pokemon store and said

steal the most valuable cards, oh, it’s 20,000 yen of cash out of the till.

Maybe I wasn’t clear.

He stole rare cards which would probably be worth a million yen or more.

He just was like, oh, there’s the till.

I’ll take 20,000 yen because it’s there.

So that maybe I wasn’t clear about that.

The 20,000 yen was icing on top of the Pokemon cake.

I was, yeah, yeah, nerd crimes.

If you put me a non Pokemon fan, now that is not me disparaging Pokemon.

I was just sort of too old when it became popular.

So I kind of missed Pokemon.

I missed Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.

I missed, you know, there’s the stuff that you like has a lot to do with your age.

So I missed Pokemon.

So I’m not saying it’s bad or anything.

But if you put me in the store with the cards,

I would stand there and go, I just assume

the ones that have the most, like the shiny

ones, they are the rarest, which may or may not be true.

I don’t know because there’s misprints and stuff like that.

So a misprint of a regular card, I wouldn’t know that was rare.

I’d walk right past it.

So there’s a certain, I don’t equate nerdiness

with crime, but it does seem like that might

be a wave of the future where you are an

expert because this is like art theft, right?

So art thieves have to know about art and it kind of makes it a very exciting crime.

Nerd stuff.

So like, oh, there’s, I know that this store has that a rare thing.

I wanted to store in just my eye, it glinted on the corner of my eye and I saw it.

That might be a wave of crime in the future.

Cyber crime, I agree, but cyber crime is different

because I’m equating nerd theft of physical

items with art theft because you would have to

be a level of nerd to understand the quality

of what you’re stealing in the first place, which is akin to old sk-so I basically what

I’m saying is I’m waiting for a movie or a TV show about like the best nerd thief, it

probably be an anime, and he steals the rarest

card from like a, it’s, you know, it’s a laser

protected system and he does sort of like down from the ceiling and stuff like that.

I just think that that might be something

that could be capitalized in the near future,

as these nerds, you might want to not want to

do Pokemon cards, but it could be collector cards.

I guess in the anime you would make up your own card system and then in that system you

have the rarest card and that’s the one he goes after.

Something like that.

I just, I see an opportunities for someone to make a franchise about something.

In the tradition of art thief movies, the heist

movies, you could do one that was incredibly

nerd oriented, which I think might be interesting.

This is fraudulent obstruction of business by

calling a cram school 12,206 times in 10 days.

So this guy, retired guy, clearly or unemployed.

Actually, what was his age?

I didn’t write down his age.

I think he was in his 60s.

He seems to be retired.

I think if you have the, I wouldn’t have the

time in a day to call, because if it’s 12,000

times over 10 days, it’s 1,200 times a day if

we’re just going to do straight up averages.

He called a cram school 12,206 times in 10 days.

He, the lady, of course, who runs the cram

school calls the police and says, I got this guy he’s like making harassment calls.

Please stop him.

The guy admits he made the calls, but says, this is the bit I like the most.

I did not intend to interfere with the school’s work.

If you call any place a thousand times, the claim that you

did not intend to interfere does not have any feet to it.

I can’t believe that.

There is the question, maybe in his warped

brain, he actually believes what he’s saying.

I would always like to dig down into this stuff.

He believes it.

Then you have to ask the question, what did you

think would happen by calling a place 12,000 times a day?

I want to do the math, but I don’t want to do it right now.

How many times an hour would he call if he

was awake for like, if he did over a 10 hour period or something like that?

I’m not going to do it right now.

I did not intend to interfere with the school’s work, but clearly you did.

Unless he is so like warped, he doesn’t realize

that calling a place a thousand times a day is going to interfere with the work.

It sounds like a really small cram school

because they say the woman, there’s a woman who

owns it, she probably has a couple teachers.

This is like a private independent entity.

There’s probably like five people work there.

One of them has to work the phone.

Or in a lot of cases, these little cram schools

like whoever’s available answers the phone,

which means you’re taking one person’s actual

job of teaching kids away from them while

they just answer your phone calls over and over again.

The reason is the best part.

Oh man, Jade, that’s awesome.

75 calls an hour.

In 60 minutes in an hour, he’s calling once a minute.

That’s ridiculous, amazing.

Thank you for that though.

I was going to do the math before and then I forgot.

This guy had been hit by a car.

And he said, I wanted to contact a man who was driving the car.

I thought he worked at the cram school.

Turns out he didn’t.

So at that point, he’s getting arrested for

harassing a group of people who were unenvolved

with the thing he was probably upset about.

And you know what, this is the bit.

My first thought was he’s not going to apologize.

He’s going to think he did nothing wrong.

He’s like, well then I’ll just stop calling them.

And that somehow is good enough.

But yeah, that, I don’t know, somehow that

story, that final element really pissed me off.

Because I was like, you know that guy doesn’t think he did anything wrong.

He’s trying to make them a thousand times a day every day for more than a week.

He didn’t think he was doing anything wrong.

And his excuse was I’m trying to get in touch with the guy who hit me with a car.

Didn’t actually know.

I thought he worked there, but he didn’t.

So I guess that’s it.

It’s that attitude.

You’ve seen that attitude a lot on the Internet.

And yeah, I really actually hope he gets punished quite severely.

Three 18-year-olds.

So as soon as you say that, you know like, oh, they’re making good decisions.

I’m trying to think when was the age when I made the worst decisions?

I think it was 16, maybe 15-16 because I was

at that age where I’m trying really hard to

be cool and tough and strong in adult and I’m not.

And I don’t have any money and I’m just

trying to get into trouble for trouble’s sake.

I think by the time I was 18, I’d actually kind of even doubt.

That’s me personally.

I know lots of people now who are in the 30s

and 40s still don’t seem to make good life

decisions, but that’s this whole separate issue.

It’s a whole separate podcast I really want to produce.

So 3 18-year-olds are sitting around and then like, our friend got arrested.

And we’ve watched too much anime.

I’m not sure.

We need revenge on the police.

So already, you know, you can see it’s going wrong already.

Like you don’t get revenge on the police.

That’s not how revenge works and it’s not how the police works.

So we’re going to get some fireworks.

We’re going to get some fire extinguisher.

We’re going to cause some trouble.

We’re going to get revenge on the police.

So they start shooting fireworks at the police station.

They start to spray the fire extinguisher around.

At least they are if the fireworks have accidentally

started a fire capable of putting it out.

And by spraying it around randomly, just as

likely to have put out a fire they’ve started.

So there is a weird safety element here that I quite like.

They then smash a window on the police station

and throw the fire extinguisher out the door

and they said causing a significant amount of damage.

The cops, the problem I saw, yeah, is that

around a police station, there are usually cops.

So if you wanted to get revenge by doing vandalism,

you’ve actually chosen the wrong place because the cops are going to be there.

And the cops are then going to be able to

catch you because the cops have like shields and sticks and guns.

They don’t tend to use the guns in Japan.

The shields and sticks they’re pretty good with.

They do have this weird pool tool and it’s got

like, it’s like a fork without a middle time.

And what they do is have two cops approach

someone from different sides, opposite sides,

and then they catch them in the middle and then they can’t move.

So if you’re like a violent criminal with a

knife, they get this like thing and they poke

you with it and the other guy poke you with

it and then they hit, it’s around your waist and you can’t move anymore.

And then some cops will come up behind you and try to disarm you.

We’re probably just thump you with a stick until you drop the knife.

But they’re very safety oriented here because they don’t deal with a lot of guns.

It’s interesting.

It’s an interesting thing.

So the three 18 year old youths were promptly

arrested because the cops were like, hey, those guys are smashing up our station.

Maybe we should arrest them for it.

They were arrested for forcible obstruction of business, which is amazing.

Oh, the last story.

I didn’t tell us.

So I now have just realized only today after

doing story after story and story of obstruction

of business, there are different kinds in different levels.

So there last story was fraudulent obstruction of business.

This is forcible obstruction of business.

But I mean bad plan all around.

You’re not actually getting revenge.

So now these three kids have been arrested.

So if they have three friends exponentially,

so that’s nine more people, they’re going to

sit around and go, we need to get revenge on the police.

And they get arrested.

And exponentially goes out and then they’re

going to end up with everyone in Japan trying

to get revenge on the police if these kids

are popular enough, which luckily they’re not.

All right, last story for today.

There’s a political meeting and it’s about promoting gender equality.

So you know it goes bad.

There is no way a story that starts with a political

meeting about gender equality is in the news

and it’s a good story or someone says something reasonable.

If it’s on the news Japan, I don’t do reasonable stories.

I do stories that I find funny or interesting in some way.

So I’m only interested in Japanese men making

political gaffes because it’s funny and it’s

because it hasn’t changed as much as they try to change.

It hasn’t changed.

They just have this group.

The thing is this, the politician who made

these comments, or he’s going to get in trouble or it’s like in his 30s.

So in my head I’m like, should know better.

I understand.

I’m not saying it’s acceptable.

I understand the 70, 80 year olds saying shit that’s just out of wack with society.

They’ve lived in their own political bubble.

They don’t understand that the world has changed.

They think things should work the way they want them to work.

So at that point, you’re not changing your mind.

You can pretend to.

That would be the best you could hope for.

You’re not 70, 80 years old and changing the way you think about things.

Women, equality, LGBTQ stuff.


I’m 50.

I am flexible.

I don’t think the way I’m thinking now changes much to the point where I die.

I think I’m kind of set.

I have had changes.

I’ve noticed that for me, certainly from my 40s, exposure changed my opinion.

So I’m not resistant to change.

That’s maybe something I could say.

I might not have thought about stuff, but as

I became more exposed to ideas and stuff, my opinion would change on those things.

So I’m still open.

But yeah, I think 20 years from now, you talk to me the way I think is set.

I don’t think it’s going to be changing much after that.

Luckily, I’m relatively liberal all-round.

I’m a Canadian.

I mean, we’re open, happy people.

You want to live your life, you live your life.

I live my life.

I live my life.

We get along.

I appreciate the differences in you and me.

Oh, we’re great.

That is actually one of the benefits of growing up where I didn’t get it.

It was a very liberal place.

I’ve been able to travel around the world and

appreciate things and make fun of shit like this.


So the actual statement.

So they’re having a meeting about gender equality.

And he says, this guy, he’s talking.

We need to go to those who are not interested in the topic of gender equality.

Like construction workers.

It’s like, okay, you know, not the most beautiful way to phrase it.

But still, I think you need to co-opt the people who are not on board.

That’s actually going after people who agree with you is almost pointless.

You need to start bringing in people who aren’t on board.

So I’m like, I don’t think the way he’s saying

it is sensitive or smart, but the core sentiment is correct.

So this actually puts his second statement

into some question if you want to take him at face value.

So then he says to a female colleague who’s in her 50s.

I’m going to give you some advice, lady.

Your video, so she obviously makes political videos.

She makes speeches and stuff and she tries to

get attention to her, the causes she promotes.

Your videos will get more views if you wear a school uniform when you speak.

Remember he’s trying to promote gender equality.

So school uniforms in Japan, I know you already know.

They are fetishized in Japan.

Jesus going, no, in the chat, yes.

So he gets called out.

Dude, telling an adult woman to wear a school

uniform to get attention isn’t really the coolest thing anyone’s ever said.

And he’s like, what?


Not promoting gender equality.

I don’t, I’m on the committee or I’m here doing the work.

So he says he tries to clarify a statement now.

So I’m a tiny, tiny bit torn because of the indelicate way he made his first statement.

But the sentiment being correct makes me think that he is indelicate in his speech,

but maybe there is the right idea in there somewhere.

But so he says, I meant that if she, she,

okay, I meant that she would attract attention if she did something eccentric.

So if he had said my prestigious female colleague, I have a recommendation for you.

If you did some eccentric things in your videos, they would garner more attention.

I bet that would have been acceptable.

Now she might say like eccentric, like what?

And then he could have done the like, I’ll

put on a school uniform and everyone would be like, ew, gross.

So I am a little torn.

I think he’s dumb, 100%.

Most politicians are, let’s be honest.

I think his core concept is correct.

If you do eccentric things, you will get more attention on the Internet.

But that maybe isn’t appropriate for the forum he’s talking about.

I think politicians doing eccentric things

to get attention isn’t really good politics.

I could do more eccentric things.

I do that right now.

I wear hats a lot in my videos, my podcast.

Maybe the baseball hat isn’t eccentric enough.

Let’s switch it to the Colonel’s hat.

And I’m going to take a more authoritarian stance in my videos from now on.

I maybe even put on like a jacket.

And let’s do it.

Let’s be, I’m going to take a more right wing stance.

This is it.

So this is what I could do.

Oh, I’ve just come up with sort of a new concept.

We could have right wing Peter, where’s the Colonel hat?

And left wing Peter, where’s the racist Irish hat?

I mean, let’s do it.

So now I could be like, you know, talking honestly

like a Canadian who has liberal values and ideals.

And you know, I think people should be left to their own devices.

And I think making gender equality statements

indelicately is probably means you’re a bad politician.

The woman should be more sexualized so that she can get more attention.

I just went into like a partial accent.

Didn’t plan the accent.

So I didn’t really know where I was going.

I think I think the right wing Colonel might

be a reoccurring character in Indonesia.

So Jade, I think you’re the only one watching.

This gets more, more, the podcast is a podcast.

It doesn’t get any views.

This might be how I get attention on the Internet.

It’s creating the right wing character that I’ve always shied away from.

The problem is do I get swallowed up by the

character and the character becomes who I really am.

And I really start believing my own bullshit.

Because that is the risk we play when we

play at who we maybe truly are on the inside.

(upbeat music).

Planned Exfil

I should just start with the news.

The news doesn’t come in like talk.

They just go.

And that’s, I’m pretending to be a new show, right?

So we’re a new show.

Remember, a few weeks back, maybe it was last

month, a woman went on Twitter and she threatened

to release siren gas and kill a bunch of people.

She was arrested.

Again, she used her own account so she wasn’t particularly hard to find.

So when they found her, they arrested her.

Turns out she was primarily an anti-smoking

activist and politician, but she had actually

failed to be successful as a politician.

I was interested in the punishment.

That’s why I kind of tried to keep up with the story.

She threatened to kill people.

She had no siren gas.

She didn’t have the ability to do it.

But she was threatening to kill people.

So I guess just public threats.

What is the punishment for that?

The jail time was it’s a fine.

Turns out it’s 300,000 yen.

It’s, you’d say $3,000?

That’s a lot for posting a tweet.

That’s just really simple.

Daegli just found that interesting because yeah, we hear about the crimes.

We also need to know about the punishments.

I feel like I haven’t got my groove.

That first story was sort of the warm up and I feel that.

It’s weird how much of a skill this actually is.

Time to learn some Japanese.

I mean, you’re here, you’re interested in

Japanese culture, you’re interested in Japanese news.

It’s time to learn some Japanese.

Give you some context first.

The legend of Zelda, tears of the kingdom came out very recently.

Before that, it had not come out yet.

That’s when this story takes place.

Cast your mind back in time.

To before, legend of Zelda, tears of the kingdom was released.

Some people really, really, really liked that game.

They really want to be part of that world.

They’ve been desperate for a new Zelda game forever.

So much so they’re willing to go to nefarious behavior to acquire a copy of Zelda.

So two people became part-time Amazon delivery

drivers in order to upon release day be able to steal the game.

Thing is, Amazon gets copies two to three

days in advance so they can deliver on release


This has got two terms.

It’s Naibeke and Uchibeke.

This is when a company worker steals product from their own company.

So these two men joined Amazon day or two before the release of Zelda.

They grab a copy for themselves and then they disappear.

So that’s actually when it became very suspicious.

So they were both in their 20s.

Zelda release date is just around the corner.

It’s like a day or two later and these two guys stop coming into work.

The manager calls the house of one of the men

and he asks the parent, maybe I think this was the mom.

What’s your son doing right now?

She says he’s playing a game.

He sort of pressed her on that and turns out

she found out it was Zelda, a game that had not been released yet.

Of course, he was immediately fired.

He was forced to return the game and pay for the game.

He had to pay for the game he did not get to

keep, which is kind of the appropriate level

of kicking the nuts for this kind of thing.

The second man, he stole not only the game itself, he stole related goods to the game.

So you get like, I don’t know, statues and

books and other things and t-shirts and stuff.

He stole all that kind of stuff.

He was found out, he was arrested.

He actually admitted that reselling stolen goods was actually his main job.

So if I can, the first guy basically return the game, pay, I assume like 7, 8,000 yen.

You’re done.

I am interested to see what the second guy,

what he gets in trouble for because it seems like a much more serious situation.

So we have a 50-year-old man.

Because we’ve had a theme running for the last few months at least.

I think it’s, no, we’ve hit like six months of 50-year-old man getting in trouble.

It’s usually pervy stuff.

This one is a non-pervy 52-year-old man who

got in trouble, which is a breath of fresh air.

It’s refreshing for me as a 50-year-old man

to know that some of my peers are not creepy.

So it’s not, it’s not a single paintbrush.

You can color the entirety of the 50-year-old male group, demographic.

Some of us, I don’t know about me, I’m not

talking about me, some of us are not perves.

Still got in trouble though.

Naughty boys.

This 52-year-old man was arrested for uploading gameplay videos to YouTube.

Now that, I stream, I cut my gameplay videos

into like clips and I upload clips of me playing

these games.

So I was very interested in this, or I was like, what, is this not okay?

When I get arrested in Japan for this, he uploaded three videos.

They were Stein’s Gate, My Darling Embrace, which is a game that was released in 2013.

So you’re like, it’s a really old game.

Who cares if he uploads gameplay of this?

It was recently ported to the Switch, PS4 and PC.

Now the videos were monetized and that actually

puts you in a worse situation because he’s making money off the thing he’s uploaded.

My videos are not monetized because no one watches.

These monetized videos contained the game’s ending.

And that’s actually where it becomes a big deal

because Stein’s Gate, My Darling’s Embrace, is a visual novel.

So essentially what he’s done is he’s taken a novel, uploaded it to the Internet.

I don’t know if he’s speed running or something,

but he basically gave away the ending, which

with companies saying, “D incentivizes people from actually buying the game.”

So it’s negatively impacting their IP if

you post the ending to a visual novel on the Internet.

I actually agree with that philosophically.

I think that’s true.

This is called Netabade.

Netabade is basically the English translation would be like a spoiler.

So because he’s monetized a video that he’s posted on the

Internet that has spoilers in it, the company came after him.

This guy is also done fast content, something we’ve talked about before.

So you get a anime series or a movie and you

cut it down into like essentially primary

plot points and you post that like five minute

summary, ten minute summary of the movie of the anime series up to the Internet.

He had racked up 5.5 million views of his

Steins gate fast content and clearly he’s going

to be in trouble for copyright violation of some sort.

Again, I’m very interested in see where this ends up.

I’ll take off my hat for this one.

90% of experienced recruiters wouldn’t hire balding people.

No, I understand pretty privileged.

I did psychology and university a bit and I really enjoyed it and something I took in

and pretty privileged is something that we can’t help.

We like to deny it sort of on an intellectual

level, but the reality is attractive people have easier lives.

They have a easier lives because other people,

they want to be close to the attractive people,

they want those attractive people to be happy with

them, they want those attractive people in their lives.

Current beauty standards, baldness and balding is

not considered a peak trait for attractiveness.

A company that specializes in thinning hair.

So there’s a little bit bias in this.

Maybe I was a little, mmm, got to look into that one a bit.

They did some research, they did some surveys.

They had AI generated faces, so let’s just pretend it’s my face.

They had my face with full hair, with thinning hair and with no hair.

And they did this for a few hundred images and then they would mix them up.

So you would see my face over the course of this process two or three times.

But the volume of hair I have would be changed in each picture.

These recruiters were supposed to rank whether

or not they would hire the person based on what they’re seeing.

It turns out that 90% of experienced recruiters would not hire balding people.

They broke it down into sort of demographics

teens to 30, so this is really just 20s.

90% said no.

40s, so 30 to 40, 86.8% no, and 40 to 50, 75% said no.

So as you get older, maybe you get more used

to people being bald or you understand that

balding is something they don’t have more

control over or you get more conscious or you’re less affected by pretty privilege.

I don’t know, that’s pretty tough.

We wouldn’t get all these 50 year old men creepy

stories if they weren’t affected by attractiveness.

93.3% of the recruiters did say appearance is important.

I agree with that.

I mean, you’re presenting yourself to other

people how you appear is really the first thing they’re going to see.

I can’t argue with that at all.

It is just too bad because how much hair I have, I have very little control over.

Now the thing is, here we get to whether they were conscious of it.

So that was, they were just saying yes, maybe

no, yes, maybe no on each face that came up, let’s say.

They weren’t conscious of the statistics until after.

So then they said consciously, does this matter, does this not matter?

1.8% admitted it was an influence.

16.7% said it did matter, but not 100%.

31.1% said not much.

24.9% said not at all, 25.5% were neutral, which

shows that their bias towards people with full

heads of hair is subconscious and they’re not even aware of it.

So maybe if they can be made aware of it, they

can make better recruiting decisions based

a little less on appearance and a little more on skills and quality.

But at the end of the day, pretty privilege

is a thing and a big part of pretty privilege.

is having luscious, beautiful mains of hair,

which is why I’m growing a massive beard because

it’s the only way I’m going to make up for the difference.

Talking about image and needing people and

hiring and recruiting, the SDF, Japan’s version

of the military, self-defense force, they

are talking about lifting the ban on tattoos,

because they don’t have enough people joining up.

So here’s one of the problems of having sort

of a strict society is you need people to

do things.

If people start doing the things that your

strict society doesn’t like, then you’re going

to like unilaterally declare them unfit and not the right people for the job.

But you might end up needing those people for the job.

So over the last couple years, the SDF has

been reaching out to sort of otaku nerd culture

by using like anime girls and stuff in their

advertising, trying to push onto an untapped segment of the population.

Now, nerds famously aren’t particularly

athletic and stuff, but let’s face it, modern

military, you might be flying drones and working computers and doing admin.

You don’t need to be particularly fit to do that.

But at this point, there are other people who,

if they have a tattoo, the military is like, we will not take you.

One of the guys speaking in charge of the military

said, look, there’s a difference now between fashion tattoos and yet kusa tattoos.

All this tattoo stuff comes from the fact

that criminals used to be branded in tattooed

and then after that, it became like a point of

pride for the yakuza that have lots of tattoos

and then they got into these sort of ornate ceremony like tattoos all over their body.

That’s a thing.

There’s a different thing.

I have a small tattoo on my shoulder and another small tattoo on my back.

That is clearly not indicating that I’m a yakuza.

It’s not saying I’ve been in prison.

I got my tattoos in my late teens.

It is what they’re talking about is a fashion tattoo.

I did it because I thought it would be cool.

I wanted to be a cool guy.

I wanted a girl to look at me and go, ooh, bad boy, he’s got tattoos.

It kind of worked for a bit.

And then that pretty privilege wore off.

It didn’t work anymore.

So there’s that.

And then there’s also the declining birth

rate in Japan means there’s less young people.

There’s less young people overall.

There’s less young people to recruit into the military.

If you can’t recruit more people into the military, you need to broaden the allowable

offenses that they have done so that you can maintain a military.

So they’re really talking about saying, let’s put it very simply.

If you don’t have full body dragon, koi, demon tattoos,

that’s not the tattoos we’re talking about anymore.

What we’re talking about is fashion tattoos.

Those are going to be acceptable in the military going forward.

I’m actually interested because politicians being old and conservative.

I bet they’re not cool with this, but then you

turn out you don’t have a military to defend yourself from North Korea.

They might change their mind pretty quickly on tattoos.

Now, this is another story about posting stuff on the Internet.

I actually should have put this at the beginning with the other one.

They’re now over the last year.

They’ve introduced Internet slander laws.

So you’re not allowed to go on the Internet and just say shit about people is not true.

The thing is, this is a young man 22 who wrote fake stories about a plastic surgeon.

Now the plastic surgeon is very famous.

His name is Takasu.

So you’re going to hear, if you come to Japan, you’ll actually see Takasu Clinic.


Clean, Nick.

They’ll have that commercial.

Now, this guy is very unique in that he’s a

Holocaust denier and he denies the existence of the Nanking massacre.

He says it’s exaggerated, but I think we also know what that really means.

Now on the flip side of that, he’s very rich

and during the 1995 earthquake, he actually

donated a lot of money and he helped a lot of people.

So is he a complete son of a bitch?

No, but is he a good person?

It’s pretty much a no there too.

It’s tough because he is clearly just very pro-Japanese.

And does that make him inherently bad?

That’s not a question I’m going to be able to

answer because I’ve never met them in Japan.

So this 22-year-old post, post some stories

that Takasu had killed people in a car accident, which is not true.

But people believed it and it was slandering his reputation.

What do you get for this?

For posting false stories on the Internet, he wrote four total.

He’s gotten three years, but 10 months imprisonment.

So he’s going to go to jail for 10 months right now.

And he’s going to be basically on probation for three years if he gets in trouble.

He actually has to go directly back to prison.

So even if you’re ripping on a piece of shit,

you actually have to focus on the piece of shit stuff.

So this is actually maybe how to, I guess it’s not slander then.

If he had written stories about how Takasu was a Holocaust denier, that’s not slander.

That’s just, he said that you could actually

cite the source of him saying that thing and you wouldn’t get in trouble at all.

Just only be aware of if you’re in Japan or

you’re going to talk about Japanese people, the

laws have gotten pretty strict about what you’re allowed to say about other people.

You just want to shit on them and make stuff up.

You can actually go to prison for that and you can go to prison for like a year.

Asapuro assembly speaker decided that it would

be a really good idea to vote for himself.

I think every politician does that.

They go into the thing and they vote.

Everyone makes a joke about like, who did you vote for?

It’s like a standard media joke with the politician.

I’m fine with that.

Then he thought, you know what?

I didn’t get enough votes for myself for myself.

I’m going to pretend to be my mom and then vote for myself again.

Now my initial instinct got me excited about

the story was I was like, oh, did he dress

up like a woman and go and vote for himself again pretending to be his mother?

Yeah, I didn’t work that way.

Which would make sense.

I think if I showed up to vote in a dress

saying I was my mom, people might be suspicious.

He took advantage of postal voting.

So his mother is disabled.

There’s voters with disabilities can mail in their ballot.

So he did that, voted for himself and sent it in.

Actually, doesn’t 100% say he didn’t vote for himself.

He voted for himself.

I think we can make the assumption.

How did they find out?

And this is the one that maybe hurts the most.

His mom ratted him out.

So he took his mother’s ballot.

He voted for himself.

He sent it in.

You can kind of assume that mom would vote for

her son, but that’s not necessarily the case.

Because if mom is willing to rat you out,

that means mom might not be 100% on board with you being a politician.

That might mean that mom was going to vote for someone else.

So you stole her vote.

So I think actually what happened here is she went to vote for someone else.

He had already taken her ballot, voted for himself and sent it in.

And she called the cops on him, which is, ah, it’s insane.

Here’s someone who’s made some bad life

decisions, which is the heartless soul of the Indian New York people.

People just continuing to make bad decisions.

And we got to keep that going because I need content.

He hits the guy in a scooter.

He’s driving his car.

There’s a guy in an electric scooter going down the road.

He hits that guy.

He would get enough points from this accident to have his license revoked.

If he has his license revoked, he’s not going to be able to go to work.

I don’t know where he lives or the situation.

So apparently public transportation was not on the table for this.

Or maybe he had a job where he had to drive.

So losing his license was out of the question.

He goes to a hearing to try to get a reduced

sentence to lose some of those points that he was going to have put on top of him.

He produces a letter written by the victim saying that basically he forgives him.

It isn’t such a big deal.

I guess that is a thing.

If I can get the person I hit by accident to

say he was an accident, he didn’t mean it.

He’s a good guy.

I could get a reduced sentence.

Kanji is hard.

Kanji is the Chinese characters used in Japanese.

And they’re hard.

I studied them and I’ve honestly kind of given up.

I am thinking I should go back to school or

something to do some more practice and more speaking.

It’s sort of buck up my level a little bit.

But at the end of the day, I’m probably never actually going to learn how to read.

It’s just too much.

Maybe you want to retire?

I’ll have the time to sit and study Kanji all day.

I do not have that time right now.

The cop notices Kanji for the man’s name.

His own name is written incorrectly.

As soon as the guy is pushed on it, he confesses that he wrote the letter himself.

So he hits someone with a scooter.

I don’t know.

Probably some bad decisions were made in there.

He decides to forge a letter.

Does not check the name closely enough so he gets it slightly wrong.

Gets caught on that and immediately gives himself up.

That is someone who needs to rethink all of their life decisions.

All right.

This is the last story of the day.

It is therefore the creepy guy story of the day.

This guy is 22 years old.

That’s two or three stories today.

We have 22 year olds.

So they got their own thing going on.

He went to the men’s bathroom in a train station.

He took off all his clothes.

And then he hit them.

I don’t know where he hit them, maybe up on the shelf or something.

He took all his clothes full of what put them away.

So no one would know when he hit them.

He then sneaks into the women’s bathroom.

And he gets his smartphone out.

He brought it with and wasn’t in his pocket

because his pocket is back in the clothes in the other bathroom.

He gets out his smartphone and he starts

trying to take pictures of women going to the toilet.

A woman who is in the bathroom, I assume looks up.

It’s either over under the stall that the

Japanese stalls go almost all the way to the grounds.

That’s going to be really hard.

So she notices that someone is pointing a

smartphone camera over the top of the stall.

And she freaks out as completely appropriate to do that.

The guy, completely naked, runs back into the

men’s bathroom to get his clothes and get.

out of there.

During that time, the woman goes to the station attendant.

Station attendant calls the police.

They’re probably police in the area.

There’s always police around, sort of big stations.

The police show up and they arrested the guy pretty, pretty easily.

He wanted to take pictures of women peeing.

He admitted that straight up.

There is a big question in this story.

And the big question for me is why do you take off all his clothes?

So we can assume part of the reason he was caught so easily.

He was going to get caught anyways.

There’s cameras, there’s other stuff.

If you had to use a ticket to get into the

station or something, they’re going to track all that.

He’s going to get caught.

You’re going to get caught way more easily

if he has to go into a bathroom, retrieve his clothes.

Because I don’t know where he hid them.

I was actually thinking if he hid them in a

stall and someone else was using that stall, he

would have had to wait for that person to finish using that stall.


It’s the naked part that’s always going to stand out.

Because if someone else comes in, I’m standing

outside the stall naked, waiting for the

person in the stall to finish so that I can go in to retrieve my hidden clothing.

Someone else comes in the bathroom, sees me completely naked.

They’re going to call the station staff too.

What do I got going on?

This is a big problem.

So he goes back into the bathroom, has to put

on his clothes, putting it in your clothes takes


If he has shoes on, I did he have bare feet.

That’s now the question.

Being naked is one thing.

Being naked with bare feet, trying to run around a station.

You’ve got to take off your shoes to put your pants on and your underwear.

This was a bad plan.

Clearly, for him and his fetish, being completely naked was part of the process.

But the reality is that level of inhibition to

his escape, obviously not a personal inhibition because he’s naked.

The inhibition to his escape is so severe

that it made it just 100 times easier for the cops to catch him.

I understand that people with fetishes of this

degree, their brains get kind of overwhelmed.

But if you’re going to commit these kinds

of crimes, this is Ninja Nusra Pym, Criminal

Advice of the Day, you’ve got to have an escape plan.

And that escape plan cannot include, I’m going

to stop and take the time to put my clothes back on.

That’s just factually, you have to have a plan

of egress when you are going to commit your crimes.

And if you don’t have that, don’t commit the crime.

So plan of attack, ingress, execution, egress, that is the most basic plan.

Each one of those has to be as efficient as possible.

Or just don’t let your fetishes overwhelm

you to the degree where you end up naked in a

women’s bathroom trying to take pictures of them peeing.

Relative Morality

It’s gonna be a short one.

May has already started out to be a bit of a bust.

I have to go to Canada next week, so there

will be no news in Japan next week, maybe

even for the next two weeks, because I’m

gonna get back on Monday night, I record on

Tuesdays, just so everyone knows what’s going on.

Ah, that’s life, life is tough.


10 million yen.

10 million yen was founded a recycling center in Sapporo.

So recycling center, I’m assuming it’s just like general garbage, things

that can be recycled, so glass and stuff.

I am wondering what it was in.

It sounds like it was just wrapped up in something else.

There’s a three month deadline for claiming the lost money.

So the police were actually looking for an owner.

At May 1st, so beginning of this month, the

money became the city of Sapporo ‘s money.

Over the course of the three months, 16 people tried to claim the money.

Now this is the bit I was interested in.

So I would love an extra 10 million yen.

Like just pass that over here, 10 million yen.

It’s not gonna totally change my life, but it would make it better for at

least a little while I’d have a lot, you know, I’d pay off all the bills.


Ah, so I understand the instinct to try to claim the money.

What we got work up of like reasons why people would claim the money.

Because you’ll be interesting to me like what kind of things the police

would ask, questions and stuff to confirm that this is your money.

So 16 people called up the Sapporo police and said, “Yeah, that’s my 10

million yen.”

One, the first one I really enjoyed was I went shopping as I walked in a

parking lot.

I dropped the 10 million yen that was wrapped in newspaper.


My question is please officers, why are you walking around with 10 million

yen wrapped in newspaper?

Now this is not as weird as it may sound at first.

When I bought a house, technically bought a house.

I haven’t paid off the house yet because I have a mortgage.

So when I attempted to start buying a house, which ends up being a multi-

year process because

of it mortgage, if we paid a massive down

payment in cash, we got, I mean, paying more

at the beginning is better because it means your mortgage is lower overall.

And also we got like a discount essentially by giving them a massive amount

of accounts.

We went to the bank and they wanted cash, which as a Western person feels

very shady, but

in Japan it’s very normal.

They don’t do checks and things like that.

So we went to the bank.

If I remember correctly, we took a 19

million yen, my wife and I pulled our money.

Had a stack of money as big as my head.

So I don’t know.

It was, it was, how do you measure ahead?

The height is bottom to top.

So I guess it’s width from the back of my head to the front of my head.

So I actually have a picture somewhere of me laying on the ground with 19

million yen stacked next to my head.

It’s the same, a sum width is my head.

This is the closest I’m going to get to a

wrap video where I’m like showing off how much

money I have on my bands as it were.

But like I knew I would never have that much money in my hand again or at

least I assumed.

I mean, I guess I’m not dead yet, but the likelihood of me having more than

19 million yen in my possession at one time is very unlikely.

You took it to the construction company, the place that it built the house.

They had that machine that, machine that counts the money.

When the point was I did actually carry that 19 million with me.

I put it in a bag, in a brown paper bag and then put it in like a backpack

and then held the backpack like I hugged it like a fragile child.

Because if I dropped this money somehow, I was not going to financially

recover for years

and years and years and years.

And we wouldn’t be able to be living in the house I live in now.

So the explanation I was walking in a parking lot and I dropped 10 million

yen wrapped in newspaper.

Rapt in newspaper is sound suspicious, but I put mine in a paper bag.

I didn’t want to put it in something

else that would make it more suspicious .

So I actually wrapped it up in something

non suspicious and put it in my backpack.

Then again, I was I was hugging this

like it could be taken from me in a moment.

The second explanation was I put 10 million

yen in my closet and now I can’t find it.

I might have thrown it out, which is the same sort of thing.

It’s like I’ve got 10 million yen.

I put it in the closet.

I cleaned out my closet, maybe forgot that

the 10 million yen was there and it ended

up at the recycling center.

That one is slightly more reasonable.

Again, because Japan has still got a strange relationship with money.

There’s still a lot of people who believe in cash.

They don’t actually want to put money in the bank.

Banks, I think most banks now don’t really offer anything significant in the

way of interest anyways.

The cash sitting in your closet is kind of more liquid.

It’s more available.

So a lot of people think about it that way.

A lot of old people in Japan keep cash in their house.

17, I think was the biggest amount of money found 42.5 million yen was found

in the garbage

in good amount.

Their suspicion is that a man died.

His house was demolished and as they took

all the stuff out of his house either before

or after.

It just ended up in the garbage.

This older man had just kept that money in his house.

This is what I’m saying.

There is a different relationship to money than we would have in the West.

The explanation for this is that there are older people who hide their cash.

So let’s say I’m older.

I have my 42 million yen.

I open up a speaker for my stereo and I stick

it in the speaker or I hide it somewhere.

I’m not going to tell where it is because

that’s the whole point of hiding it.

But then I die.

It’s not like you usually prepare for your death in this way.

So you don’t tell anyone where your money is so they don’t know.

So they start throwing out your old stuff.

They’re not going to think like, oh, I should open up these speakers.

And check for money.


It puts you in a weird position.

Let’s say I have my father in law or my parents in law.

They die.

Should I start breaking down all their stuff

to see if they’ve hidden any money in the


It seems weirdly mercenary at this.

But at the same time, of course, I don’t want to throw out 42 million yen

that could benefit my family or someone

else in the family who maybe deserves it.

It suddenly felt like crypto to me.

They’ve just stored it somewhere else where no one else can get it because I

have a tiny amount of cryptocurrency.

I was big into cryptocurrency and then it really started to turn out like it

wasn’t going to get used the way they were promising it.

It became like an investment thing and not like something you use where for

me, the idea of Internet money, something you use was really appealing.

So I have like basically left over money

in crypto and then the price all tanked.

So it wasn’t really worth, you know, going back to it the moment.

If it seems like it’s going to take off again, maybe I’ll look at it again,

but I really

want it to be something you can use, not something that just sits there and

it becomes like an investment opportunity

that may or may not hold value over time.

But that means I have like a USB stick

with, let’s say, a 500 bucks crypto on it.

If I die, that’s gone.

If that had been like where I was storing my money, if I was taking my

savings, putting

in crypto and I die, you’re not going to break the security to get in there.

It’s got like whatever, 15, 20 word pass codes that you have to find and

know the right order and stuff.


So this is similar.

It’s the old version and the new version is almost the same thing.

Anyways, no one convinced the police it was there 10 million yen.

The police have reverted the money to the city.

And so that’s it.

We did a story a little while ago that if

you, someone turns in the money, you have to

give them an award, like a reward, a thank you.

It was between, I think it was five and 20% of the value, which means the

person who found

this, if someone had claimed it, they would have got as a minimum five

percent of the money they were supposed to have found 10 million yen.

But because it goes back to the city, maybe they don’t get anything.

I wonder if there’s a reward for the

city worker who found the 10 million yen.

I sit there and I go like, man, because I’m not rich enough to throw away 10


If I found 10 million yen when I turn it in, I assume if I found that much

money, it was from someone nefarious.

It was like a yakusa, lost it or something.

So then I wouldn’t feel bad, but then I don’t know what’s the yakusa.

So it might be the situation where it was like 40 million yen.

A family member died and that family could really use it.

I would feel bad about that.

I don’t want to steal from a family.

I wouldn’t have problems stealing from yakusa.

But I think my assumption is if I find money somehow on the street of that

volume that it.

was someone doing something in the first place.

So maybe I got to readjust my attitude

and be a more honest and better person.

Probably won’t happen today though.

There’s nothing dishonest about keeping money you find.

I mean that’s technically a possibility.

The problem I’m what I actually mean is when it’s 40 million yen and I find.

it and I would

benefit from 40 million yen, but there

could be a family that has that money .

Okay wait, I have to restart my sentence.

There is a family out there who let’s say like the father died and that the

kids need more that money more than I do.

That’s all.

I’m saying there’s a relative morality there that’s a bit of an issue from.

I have a family too, but I am able to provide for my family.

So what I’m saying, there might be a family out there that cannot provide

for the family

as well.

And 50 million yen would benefit them more.

Like it would make their life better.

Whereas my family would be like icing on the cake.

So I’m just saying like I don’t want to take food out of someone’s mouth to

put icing on my cake.

Okay, you’ll do it.


Well you wait, wait, wait.

By managing the money for me, do I get the money?

I don’t know, I’m a little concerned about this.

The guy who threw the pipe bomb at the prime minister, he just got a new

warrant served.

So he threw the pipe bomb, got arrested right away.

And then they release you.

This is, this was not really what’s happening is not that interesting.

So he’s got basically the police went to his house, they searched his house,

they found gunpowder.

And then just this week reissued a new

warrant for his arrest over the gun powder.

And this is something it’s not again, it’s not a surprise that he had gunpow

der in his house if he was making pipe bombs to throw at the prime minister.

It’s a surprise that they didn’t do it all at once.

Now what the police in Japan do is they stagger their warrants.

Now this could be seen as a form of

harassment, which I think in some cases it is.

I don’t know about this one.

One you get into pipe bomb territory, I

don’t feel too bad if the police are asking.

But there’s a system in Japan where they can arrest you.

Without charging you, they can hold you for

basically a month, I think it’s 24 days.

Then they have to let you go.

But what they do is let’s say they have three or four charges, they will.

hold you for 20

days, release you.

As you walk out the building, they will re-arrest you on the second warrant

and bring you back in, hold you for 20 days.

This was a system designed to disrupt a drug dealer’s business.

So let’s say I’m a drug dealer.

If I’m off the street for two to three months, like one month basically each

, they will disrupt

my ability to sell drugs because all my customers are going to go find

another drug dealer.

If I have a day job, I’m going to lose my day job.

So it’s very disruptive to my life.

The Japanese police do this on purpose to

extend the length of time they can basically

hold you.

It also helps them, it gives them time to build a case or whatever without

actually arresting

you because once they arrest you, they have to put the evidence forward and

they have to go to trial.

This is another reason why the Japanese conviction rate is so high is

because they’re essentially

giving themselves so much time to build the case they want to build.

I don’t think the fact that we have this guy on video throwing a pipe bomb

at the prime minister, it’s a pretty open and shut case.

I was just surprised that they dropped another warrant now, but I’m betting

it so they can

look more into his background and stuff because

this guy has still not made a statement.

A lot of the crime stories we do on the Internet is Japan.

The thing you hear about is the statement.

The statement is always immediate and to me relatively amusing because it’s

like, “Yeah, I did it.

I’m proud of it.”

Or then they go to jail.

I don’t remember because I was drunk, which

is a very common defense in Japan, which

actually doesn’t work.

Because I don’t think you not remembering it gets you off the hook.

I think I guess the idea is that if I say I don’t remember it, there’s no

point in them asking me any further questions.

I’m not helping their case at all.

I’m assuming that’s what they actually mean is I don’t remember so that you

can stop asking me questions because you keep asking me questions.

I’m just going to keep saying I don’t remember.

I’m not helping you build a case against

me, which is again the criminal’s job.

If you’ve committed crimes, your job is to not help the police arrest you.

Keep that in mind.

This guy, I just thought it was interesting

that they’re going to drop a warrant now.

A month from now, we might hear a new warrant drop for another thing.

Another thing, another thing.

Because they’ve gone through it through his house.

They now have all the things in his house

that they were, that he had illegally.

The gunpowder would have been illegal.

The pipe bombs he made would have been illegal.

That’s two charges, two warrants right there.

It also means they can get more invasive into his house.

In this case, again, I’m pretty, actually think it’s pretty justified.

He threw a pipe bomb.

He could have killed not only a prime minister

as target, but everyone around 20, 30,

innocent people.

Yeah, I’m okay with this.

It’s a weird question though.


Very much like my feeling about taking

money that I just found on the street .

Justice should have be applied equally, but then at the same time, it’s like

, we know this guy’s guilty.

So you have to worry about whether we harass or not or keep him in jail

because they should be keeping him in jail.

What I just realized though is what my morality is fluid.

Which is bad.

When you’re talking about laws and stuff, it should be like, yes or no, it

shouldn’t be like, well, in this case, yes, in that case, no.

Maybe that’s Ignat’s idea about me keeping the money I find on the street,

finders, keepers rules.

But again, my feeling is in some cases, it would be perfectly justifiable

taking money from the Akhuzah.

I wouldn’t feel bad about that.

But if the family’s poor and I take money from them, I wouldn’t want to do

that inadvertently as the… Anyways, next story.

Upskirt photos.

We’ve talked about this a billion times in Japan.

It’s surprisingly how often cops get arrested for taking upskirt photos.

Photo voyeurism is going to be made illegal.

It’s going to be banned.

My first thought is, what?

How is upskirt photos not already illegal?

So when you take an upskirt photo, so I’m on the escalator, always happens

on escalator.

The lady in front of me is wearing a short skirt.

I take my cell phone out, I take a picture of her skirt, and I get arrested.

I wasn’t getting arrested for taking the photo.

I was getting arrested for harassing the person, which I didn’t realize.

Like I’d actually talked about the story a million times and yes, you’re

getting arrested for harassment.

But the actual taking of the photo wasn’t

the crime, which I’ve only realized now.

It’s shocking that in Japan in 2023, taking a unsolicited photo of someone’s

essentially genitalia without their permission was not illegal.

But that was the case.

This is going into a bill that’s expanding all the sexual crimes.

I have talked on a previous episode about how the definition of rape is

being expanded.

In Japan, up until very recently, it was only really rape if you could prove

you tried to defend yourself.

You could prove that you fought back.

Now we know that’s not always the case.

We know it’s not always possible.

But it also meant that if I bill Cosby to Lady, that was perfectly legal

because she didn’t fight back against it.

That’s why so many of these cases are so frustrating for women from a woman

‘s point of view.

So the definition of rape is being expanded.

So all the things I just mentioned are now going to be illegal.

Upskirt photos and other similar things are

not going to be just part of harassment to

build a case.

It’s going to be illegal in itself.

So it would be, harassment is charge one.

Upskirt photo is charge two.

If they do something else gross, that’s probably another charge.

Gruming minors will now be illegal, which was not illegal before.

I think the problem with grooming minors was the definition of grooming min

ors and the definition of minor in Japan was

actually pretty vague because you get all

the creepy dudes to point out that like the

age of consent in Japan is 13, it’s not.

It used to be.

It’s not anymore.

So just be aware of that creepy dudes listening in in Japan, which is.

probably a lot of you.

If I take an upskirt photo of a woman, which is now going to be referred to

as photo voyeurism,

I can get up to three years in prison and a three million yen fine.

In 2021, there were 5,000 arrests for upskirt photos.

But again, this was harassment or maybe those guys just got off because it

wasn’t technically illegal.

That is three times more than 2010.

And I think the rise in that crime comes down to the availability and sort

of technological level of cell phones and cell phone care.

I don’t think my obsession with older men who commit crimes is going to go

away because as I come into my golden years, I’m going to be 51 very soon.

So my is my brain going through a transition is kind of the underlying

question of every

time I do a crime story involving a 50 plus year old man, is it going to

happen to me?

There’s a concern and a piece of entertainment value because I am a

relatively moral person.

I’m not going to say good because again, the underlying theme of this whole

episode has been that my morals are fluid.

So in one instance, I would say something

is dead wrong, you should never do it.

But then change the circumstances.

I’d be like, yeah, maybe it’s okay.

I think that’s true for everybody.

But I think most people are not as honest about it.

And I struggle with what is right and wrong.

But that is all governed by the chemicals in your brain.

And the chemicals in your brain change over time.

So am I over the next three or four years going to change in such a way that

I end up in a situation.

The one that got me the most was the 50 year old man who saw a high school

girl in a shopping mall, got down on his

knees and just started licking her shoes.

Part of his brain, the chemicals in his brain was telling him that this was

a good idea.

Another part of his brain was like,

she might even like it and be like into it.

So that was always like, is that where my brain is going at some point is a

question I have.

Anyways, this 53 year old man goes into a

store and he shop lists a skirt, walks out

and they don’t catch him.

But the security guy, the guy in charge of

the security cameras, he’s checking that he

actually stole the skirt.

And so he knows the guy’s face, he knows the skirt that the guy stole.

He knows sort of the general situation.

And this is like, at this point, we’re not going to go chase him.

He’s gone.

So whatever.

The problem is the man returned later that afternoon and he was wearing the

skirt that he stole.

And again, part of me goes like, did he think he was getting away with it?

Did he think he was going to go back and steal more clothes?

Did he think no one was going to notice?

Has his brain taken him to a place where he’s so disconnected, he thinks, I

‘m going to get away with this?

Or does he actually want to be arrested?

Because there are another part of his brain that’s going like, this is going

to get you arrested, let’s go do that.

Maybe that’s what he wants.

It could be one of these situations where the guy’s been in prison in the


And he’s actually now at this point in his life more comfortable in prison.

He might be a homeless person who struggles to survive and actually prison

is going to be more comfortable in the life he’s living now.

All those are terrible things.

So I don’t want to make jokes about them.

But if he was dead serious, I’m going to steal this skirt.

I’m going to put on this skirt.

They’re going to think I’m a different

person because I’m wearing different clothes.

I’m going to go back to the same store, maybe steal some more stuff or just

do some casual shopping.

I would love to know what was going on through that guy’s head.

So we have one more story, a little quick story.

It’s what Otaku think is going to happen when they have kids.

So first of all, they have to assume they’re having kids.

Otaku in Japan, it’s pretty relatively famous that they’re not.

They’re essentially in cells.

If you have kids, are you going to maintain your current time and money put

into your hobby?

This is the question that was asked.

So 82% of Otaku said if they have kids,

they would spend less time on their hobbies.

That is pretty reasonable.

You have other people in your life.

You have to spend more time on them.

You have to give up some time.

You give up time on your hobbies.


So I’m going to spend the exact same amount of time on my hobbies, 16%.

I’m going to spend even more time on my hobbies, 2%.

I think those people are deluded in getting themselves.

By adding more people into the mix, you just get less time.

That is, the people are always astounded by the fact that I can produce this

podcast and seeming to be in other things.

And they’re like, where do you find the time to like, I carve out a schedule

when people are not in the house.

Otherwise I just can’t do it.

I’m also weirdly self-conscious about doing

a podcast while other people in the house.

They just hear me talking.

They’re like, let me be downstairs.

So they don’t really hear anything.

There’s no, but I’m always like, I have a different feeling when someone

else is around.

Will you spend less, same or more money once you have kids?

84% said they would spend less money.

Again, very reasonable assumption.

You have to take your sum of your money and spend it on these humans you

have produced.

I’m going to spend the same amount of money.

Actually not unreasonable.


Like I put aside this much money for my hobby.

I’m going to keep that much.

And then the other money I make is going to go to the family and stuff.

I can actually see if you actually planted

it out in advance that would work out.

2% I think the same 2% as the first category.

I’m going to spend more money on my hobbies.

So they’re almost defiant that yes, I’m going to have children.

I’m going to spend more money on my hobby.

Now this was the bit that I thought maybe where it would work in.

19% said they would enjoy their hobby with their kids.

So I think maybe that 2% from the previous two surveys is saying that I’m

going to spend more time on my hobby

because I’m going to induct my children.

There was a better word.

I’m going to bring my children up in my hobby.

Therefore I’m going to spend time with them,

spend money with them on the hobby so we

can enjoy it together.

But that might be the route to take.

So that’s like I’ve met lots of families.

So I practice judo.

I’ve met literal judo families where like

every parent, child, grandparents and stuff,

they all do judo.

So they raise the kids in that environment.

I don’t think they force them to do it but there’s like this is what we do.

You can join and they get into it because it’s a family thing.

They’re saying like I’m going to grow up with anime.

Anime is going to be on TV.

I’m going to buy DVDs and stuff or Blue Rays.

The kids are going to see them.

I’ll buy more.

Maybe it will expand what I like or expand to what the kids like.

I’ll buy stuff for them.

So I’ll actually end up spending more money on the hobby.

I make gun to models.

I’m going to do that with my kids.

The kids are going to grow up making models.

We’re going to spend more time and more money on the models.

I’m not going to enjoy my hobby with my kids.


I actually understand this thinking.

I did not force my children to do judo.

Just my thing, I know judo is a very sort

of unique personality type that enjoys it.

A lot of people will not enjoy getting beat up or beating people up.

I had no problem not sharing my hobby with my kids.

If they were interested, I would have brought them in but I was never going

to force them.

I think that might be where these guys their mindset is, which is good.

Fourcing your kids into your hobby is not a good thing to do.

Either is fine, 63%, which is again, all

three of those I can kind of mentally

justify the thinking they’re going through.

I think they’re all have good points and bad points.

But yes, if you are a nerd, if you listen

to the issues you spend, you probably are.

It is worth thinking about how can I indoctrinate my children into my hobby.

Should I do that?

Do I want to do that?

Do I want to share my hobby?

I think it’s a really nice thing to do.

But I think it’s a really nice thing to do.

If they’re interested in it, I don’t think

it’s a really nice thing to do if you have

to force.

(upbeat music)

(upbeat music).

Too Much Lunch Fun

Golden Week in Japan.

What is Golden Week? Golden Week is a series of small national holidays and

if you have a nice company, it gives you the whole week off.

Schools don’t and other companies don’t, so I’m alone in the house.


So that of course is led to a lunchtime cocktails.

I’ve realized I like drinking in the afternoon better than I drink at night.

I don’t know why.

I think it’s because it wears off as the day progresses.

Number two also means afternoon ice cream.

I am living the best life 12 year old me good have ever imagined because I,

okay, when I was a kid I never podcast didn’t exist yet.

I didn’t like, oh, I will be podcasting what I grow up.

Oh, fucking idiot.

I could have done, I realized like you think about, I came to Japan in 2001.

YouTube wasn’t a thing yet and it wasn’t a thing until I think 2004.

I could have been one of the first YouTubers and I missed that opportunity.

I realized most of my failure, which is all things.

I have been primarily because I didn’t

realize when I should adopt something new.

So now all these like new services like Twitter is kind of failing and all

these other services are coming up to take its place.

And I think, oh, maybe this is the opportunity for me to get in on the

ground floor and be

one of the sort of the OG guys of this

platform and that’ll build up an audience.

And then I go, yes, work.

Fuck that.

Anyways, Japan is on holiday but that

doesn’t mean we take a break from news .

I might have to take a break later in the month but that’s other stuff.

Nothing to do with you.

Don’t worry about it.

A man in a goya, he worked at a host bar.

Not a terrible thing.

I don’t judge people.

We work at host bars.

I think it’s a bit skeasy but yeah, because you’re manipulating people into

giving you money because you’re trying

to get them to think that you love them.

That is the bad part.

If everyone was above board, like I’m here, I’m here to entertain you.

I don’t love you.



I’m here.

I’m here to entertain you and I do love you, give me stuff.

That’s not cool anymore.

Part of that job is to bring a new customer.

So they have you like sometimes go out on the street.

This is a question.

So if you have a host club, you have a host club or a host is club.

And you have like let’s say 10 staff, 10 hosts.

Do you take the best ones and put them on

the street so the people come in and they’re

slightly disappointed by the quality of the host that are in the club?

Or do you take like the lowest tier ones, put them on the street so when

they people come into the club, they’re

like, ooh, those guys are looking better.

It’s an interesting dilemma because better

looking hosts on the street should bring

in more traffic.

But then if everyone’s disappointed, you get a bad reputation.

Whereas everyone, if the host, your lowest level hosts are mediocre and they

bring in people

and the people in, if you bring in people

and they’re all like, oh man, it’s even more

of a wonderland of man meat in here than it was out on the street.

That’s a good thing, right?

It’s a tough one.

There’s a thing about that.

So you got to go out on the street and you got to get more customers to come

to your club in that way you can get the

fake out that you love people more and steal

their money.

Fortunately, an I.G.

Not across Japan.

I don’t know, only an I.G. but definitely an I.G.

That kind of solicitation is actually illegal.

Oh, you can see where the problem arises.

Problem arises when you can cry.

That’s how you get on the news Japan.

There are two ways to get on the news Japan.

One, to commit a crime in Japan.

And that’s vaguely interesting to me.

For number two, send me a message.

You can send an email to as an audio

message and then I’ll hear your voice.

I will respond to your voice.

I like people’s voices very much.

So if you want to be 800 people famous, my core audience is 800 people.

You want to be 800 people famous.

You got a New Jersey pet.

I give you a little.

Who knows?

Your video might be the video that takes off.

So this guy goes on the street.

This is a job.

He’s like, I got to ask people to come to my club so I can pretend to love

them so I can steal their money.

He makes the classic mistake of soliciting

an undercover police office woman .

And so he gets arrested.

But turns out during the day, he is a school teacher.

Now the first thought I had was those are overlapping skills.

A host needs to keep you engaged and entertained while you know talking

about you in your life.

School teacher needs to keep you engaged

and entertained while talking about material

that isn’t inherently boring.

If you are inherently boring, those are the exact same skillset.

So if you’re a good host, you probably would also be a good teacher.

Go figure, right?

That’s what I thought.

Oh wow.

Hosts and teachers.

They need the same basic skills.

Teachers in IT are classified as civil servants.

So you need permission to work a second job.

So everyone’s like, well, how did this teacher get permission to work a

second job as a host?

There is a secondary issue.

Maybe the host was the main job.

And teaching was the secondary job in which case technically wouldn’t work,

but you know that’s not how that works.

Now this guy only worked 20 hours a week.

Therefore you have found a loophole.

If he works part time, he doesn’t need permission to work a second job so he

can work a second job as a host.

Of course they don’t intend for you to take on these salacious type jobs.

But there is a rule that if you are a teacher, you can’t take on a secondary

job that discredits

teaching, which is where the host and teacher of Venn diagram separate, that

being a host would disparage the nature of being an honorable teacher.

But of course because he committed a crime.

So now they’re like, I should be guy, you

rid of this guy, but then we can’t fire him

for that because technically it’s not listed

specifically that you can’t be a host.

Because he committed a crime, he solicited

an undercover police office woman .

That is a loophole they found to fire him.

So he found a loophole to get that second job, but they found a loophole to

get rid of him.

I really enjoyed this story and I don’t know why.

So a couple of weeks ago, the Prime Minister

of Japan had a pipe bomb thrown at him.

It didn’t go off.

It didn’t actually hurt anyone.

It made some smoke.

It was how life just happened sometime.

The public safety chief was eating lunch.

He was just about to eat lunch when he got the news that a pipe bomb had

been thrown at one of his wards, the Prime Minister of Japan.

What did he do?

What did he say?

He said, I had been looking forward to

eating a delicious bowl of grilled eel rice.

I was just about to start eating when I received a call.

So instead of getting up and being like, I have to go defend, I have to go

check on the Prime Minister.

Never mind, defend him.

I go check that he’s okay.

This guy that I’m so irresponsible for taking care of, fuck that.

Lunch has been served.

I’m going to eat lunch first.

So I made sure to eat the bowl of eel rice.

Everyone’s now really pissed off at him because you’re supposed to be the

guy in charge of security.

Lunch comes and you have an option of dealing with a security issue or

eating lunch and you chose to eat lunch.

I was like, that’s a bad thing.

I was like, maybe that’s not a bad thing.

Maybe you want a guy in charge of security to be so confident in the

security that he’s provided that he’s

like, I don’t even need to leave lunch.

I can eat my lunch.

I know security is taking care of because I’ve done such a good job.

And I am so calm and cool during a crisis.

I just eat my eel, my grilled eel on top of rice.

I fucking hate grilled eel.

Water snakes grilled is not good.

Let’s just be honest.

There’s a lot of foods in Asia that I’ve tried and some I like some I don’t

know to be fair.

I tried grilled eel and I found it.

I think primarily the texture really put me off but I did not enjoy grilled

eel at all.

This guy, chief of safety, chief of public safety was very, very much

looking forward to his grilled eel.

Now the secondary concern is that he is also in charge of security at the

upcoming group of seven summit next month

in Hokkaido and some of the other party.

So there’s LDPs in charge and he’s part of the LDP party.

He’s in charge of public safety, chief.

They saying he has no sense of tension or responsibility towards his duties.

But maybe he just has priorities.

I’ve set security in place.

There’s nothing I can do about it now.

Lunch is here.

My priority is now lunch.

I’ve done my job.

I’ve done my due diligence.

Here’s my lunch.

My due diligence at this point is to not waste taxpayers money.

Or paying for my lunch probably most likely because of the way Japanese

politics works.


I do enjoy a good stat.

The problem being that these are all kind of depressing in one way and yet

when God closes one statistic, he opens up the variable on the other side.

I don’t know if that quite works.

I might have to work on that phrase a little bit.

By 2070, Japan’s population will shrink 87 million people.

That is a shrinkage of up to 30%.

I almost made a penis in the cold joke.

But I didn’t because this is a classy podcast.

Foreigners in 2020 made up 2.2% of the population by 2070.

They will, according to current projections,

be 10.8% of the population of Japan.

You can tell you there’s a lot of our old Japanese racist politicians would

not be happy

about that because it cuts to a point where you might be like, “Hey, maybe

we have to give foreign residents basic civil

rights,” which Japanese politicians have

argued against in the past.

Past, Ninja News Japan episodes, I have talked about how they’re like, “Yeah

, they’re foreigners

in there here and they pay taxes, but we don’t want to vote or anything.”

By 2043, that one, 2043 is going to be

the peak of 65 and older people in Japan.

Nearly 40 million people in Japan will be 65 and older.

In 2070, the fertility rate is projected to be 1.36%.

Currently, it is 1.33%.

It’s up 0.3%, which is not enough to keep the population going to maintain

your population.

You need a fertility rate of 2.07%.

That means for every man and every woman, you have to have 2.07 children, so

some families have to have three, to maintain the population.

I, being a foreigner in Japan, I am on the plus column.

I have produced extra babies for Japan and you are welcome.

My babies have good genes.

My genes.

They have good beard genes.

I actually am waiting.

My son’s 15.

Can’t grow a beard yet.

I want to see what he’s bearded.

I’ve been growing a beard lately.

If you’re watching the video, you can see my beard is a glorious red color,

which is really

weird because my hair is brownish red, but there’s a transition point up by

my ear where it changes dramatically.

But it’s a full beard.

It’s not that I’ve only been growing it for

a month or so, but give it a little time.

It’s going to be a massive viking beard very soon.

My son, he has Japanese genes, which don’t grow beards very well.

And he has my genes, which grow some of the most magnificent face hair ever

known to men.

What is he going to have?

I really want to see.

I guess I got to wait a couple more years.

I think he’s going to have, he doesn’t seem to have much now.

I’m wondering if that’s because he’s still a bit too young.

I can’t remember when I kind of came into my own.

I think it was 58.

Anyways, there’s a couple, one more step.

In 1990, Japan was the seventh most populous nation in 2022 to drop to 11th.

And that’s because of the population decline, which is increasing.

People got to get fucking, I mean, it’s really just that simple.

People got to fucking make babies and they

talk about all these government programs.

I think the last like five, six weeks we’ve

done stories about population decline and

what the government is doing.

It’s just the core issue is.

Those work culture sucks ass and therefore Japanese people don’t.

God damn, this is a dirty episode.

Lunchtime cocktails during a holiday really change the tone of this podcast.

This is what you like.

What you have to do is find a way to give

me enough money that I quit my job and lunch

drink all the time so that I can do my podcasts like this.

Here’s a story about how tough it is to be Akusa in modern Japan.

They put a lot of rules in place to discourage Yakusa.

Basically, there’s a rule that says, “A Yakusa, someone, a member of

organized crime family, cannot engage the contract with another person.”

It’s illegal.

“A Yakusa makes a contract with you.”

That contract is null and void by the very

nature of the fact that the other person on

the other side of the table is a Yakusa.

So that means Yakusa in modern-day Japan technically, it’s illegal for them

to have a phone because they have to have a phone contract to get a phone.

There was a story like last month or two months ago.

I didn’t actually think I did it in Jusban.

You can’t get a supermarket loyalty card

because you’re entering into a contract with

the supermarket.

You cannot get a car legally because you have to enter into a contract with

the car dealership to buy a car.

You can see by just making it that it’s not legal for you to enter into

contracts, they can get you on almost anything.

Two Yakusa at the end of last month.

So now is May 2nd, so it’s like a couple days ago.

They were like, “Hey, we like tigers.

The tigers is baseball team.”

We were like, “Tigers, let’s go see tigers baseball game.”

The other Yakusa was like, “Yo, buddy, let’s do that.”

Let’s go get a driver, drive us to the stadium, get in, we’ll take it, we’ll

be going with it.

So what happened though?

Previously, 2003.

That is 20 years ago.

What Yakusa were doing is they would get homeless people to go buy tickets.

They would collect those tickets and then scalp them at three times the

value of the ticket creating their scheme to scalp tickets.

Because in Japan, a lot of things you have to go and you can buy basically

one or two tickets per person, but you

actually have to show up and buy the tickets.

They got around this by employing homeless people.

The stadium, this is nothing to do with entering into contracts.

The stadium said, “We’re just going to ban members of organized crime from

the stadium.”

It’s a very easy thing to do.

There’s literally, if you go to the Tiger

Stadium in Japan, I think it’s in Osaka.

There will be a sign in it that says, “Members of organized crime are not

allowed, are not permitted to enter this facility.”

You think that would just be like a given.

A member of organized crime shouldn’t be allowed to enter anywhere.

They just put up a sign.

Now they can actually say, “We’ve legally made it very clear that you

organized crime members are not welcome.”

Here’s where it all falls apart.

They had a guy, I assume a low-level guy,

who’s a guy, drives them to the stadium.

He has to wait outside.

He’s not allowed to watch the baseball game because he’s low on the totem

pole and he is like sock, so he has to sit in the car.

He’s parked illegally because this is an organized crime family.

They organize crimes all the time without even thinking about it.

They, he parks illegally, he’s like, “I’m Yakuza, this is what I do.”

It’s police walk up and they’re like,

“Hey, oh, boy, you’re parked illegally .”

He’s like, “Yeah, fuck you.”

You didn’t actually say that.

They probably had a very pleasant conversation because the Yakuza driver guy

didn’t want any trouble.

So they talk to him and they’re like, “Hey, partner.

This is me being too police officers.”

Hey, partner.

I think this is a little suspicious.

The other guy goes, “The other police officer goes, “Yeah.”

This is a little suspicious.

No why?


Because I think he’s parked illegally and he thinks it’s okay because he’s Y

akuza and the other guy goes, “Fuck you.”

But, why is he just waiting here?

Why is he waiting here to get in trouble?

So I think there’s other Yakuza in the stadium.

Let’s do a stakeout.

Ah, fucking classic.

Let’s do a stakeout.

Let’s stake out together.

Hey, you and me, buddy.

Let’s get some Doritos getting the car.

Sit and watch.

I mean, we’ll listen to the game.

As we sit outside the stadium, so the game’s

happening right there as we listen to it,

sort of live, not really.

We’re going to catch ourselves in Yakuza criminals.

Fuck yeah, let’s do that.

That’s fucking great.

Let’s do that.

It’s awesome.

So they do that.

The Yakuza come out of the stadium, fucking arrested.

They got arrested for going to a baseball game.

So my thinking was, the driver really fucked this up.

So what he should have done is he’s sitting in the car, the police walk up

to talk to him.

He says, “Oh, shit, guys.

I parked in the wrong place.

I will drive away.”

Send a text message.

So there’s two options.

One, drive away and say, “I’ll meet you around the corner.

I’ll pick you up after the game.”

Or number two, send them a text message and go, “Guys, you got to make your

own way home.

The cops are checking me out.

I’m going to bail now.”

And I think any reasonable Yakuza would be like, “Oh, shit.

The cops checked you out.

You should get out of here.

We’ll catch the bus.”

I know the Yakuza.

Oh, they’ll get a taxi.

They got fucking money.

It’s the driver who’s really at blame for this.

Now, when the Yakuza were arrested, like, I didn’t know it was illegal for

us to go to a baseball game.

But essentially because your entire life is illegal, you should just know it

‘s illegal for you to do anything.

So the fact that you get arrested for

something, it should not be a fucking surprise.

You fucking idiot.

I’m calling out all Yakuza right now.

You do illegal things.

You can’t pretend to be surprised when you

get arrested for doing something illegal.



Let’s get some more, but maybe I’ve sworn it or sworn it.

It’s enough.

This is the last story.

And this is again, how not to commit

crimes anywhere, not just Japan anywhere.

Is lady, she had applied, so there was a recent story.

This is maybe connected of a guy who got really upset.

He wanted, the guy who threw the pipe bomb at the prime minister was a

failed politician.

This lady is also a failed politician.

Just the other day, she said she was going to disperse siren gas on the

subway of the city.

She posted that on Twitter.

Now here’s the first problem.

The account was in her name and totally

just was very clear about what was going on.

It’s like, I’m going to threaten everybody in the city.

I’m going to tell you a time.

I’m going to post it on Twitter with my name and my face attached to it.

A bunch of people called the cops.

This is fraudulent obstruction of business.

But then I realized, okay, who is she defrauding?

Is it the train station?

No, because the police showed up and

they had to look for siren gas can isters.

And is it obstruction of business?

Because technically, what they’re arresting

her for is obstructing police business.

But police business is investigating crimes.

So if she’s created a crime for them to investigate, therefore she’s not

obstructing the police business.

She’s creating jobs.

She’s creating business for the police to investigate.

The police had to search the station.

They didn’t find anything.

They went and arrested her.

Her post says, I am Shoko Asahara of the Rewa era.

So that for anyone who doesn’t live in Japan, maybe a little confusing.

Shoko Asahara is the person who dispersed siren gas in the 90s.

The Alm cult.

A leader.

I think executed.

A bunch of them were executed.

I think he was also executed.

The Rewa era is the current era in Japan of the most current emperor.

So what have we learned today?

Don’t be a Yakusa.

If you’re going to not be a Yakusa and threaten to kill everybody, don’t

post it on Twitter.


A Podcast to Damage your Dignity


Got a lot of politics today.

It’s actually the,

essentially the fallout from the guy who threw the pipe bomb at the prime

minister last week.

Of course, the very first thing I said was what was his actual motivation.

So the fact that he threw a pipe bomb, it didn’t go off properly, which is a

good thing,

because there was a lot of people there, and a lot of people would have got

hurt and killed.

What was his motivation for doing it?

Now, he has not admitted to a motivation, but they’ve looked into his

background and come up with some interesting facts.

He had filed a lawsuit last year for mental distress after he was unable to

file for candidacy for the House of Counselor’s election.

So he wanted to be a politician.

He was unable to file to be a politician,

and was so upset about that, said it was

mental distress, and then he tried to sue them.

This is where we get to learn some of the requirements to be a politician.

You actually have to be 30 years old. That’s, I guess, fair.

I actually don’t think age should be part of it.

I mean, I think if your teenager goes up there and no one wants to,

a teenager to be their counselor or governor or anything,

then you won’t vote for them.

I don’t, I actually don’t necessarily, this is a good personal opinion.

I don’t necessarily agree with an age requirement.

I think it would make sense if you were over 30,

have a little life experience, maybe done some work,

but I don’t think that should be a requirement.

I actually think there should be a end point,

a retirement age for becoming governor,

because right now in America, I was noticing the prime minute.

It was just how Canadian I am.

The president, he’s in his 70s and Trump is in his 70s,

and all the guys are trying to be president in our own their 70s.

I think that might be too old.

I mean, they talk about, you know, Trump being feeble and stuff,

but I think when you have a mandatory retirement age for work,

being 60 or 65 or something like that,

that should also be the retirement age for service in public office.

I think a certain amount of youthful vitality is important.

So this is why Obama was good.

He was a young president, Justin Trudeau,

even if you don’t agree with the politics, he’s a vibrant leader,

which is, I think, important.

So the must be at least 30 years old, I disagree with that,

but I think they should have an upper limit

of how old you can be to be president,

or public office.

And this is actually the more important part.

You have to pay 3 million yen.

So if you want to run for office in Japan,

you have to put a deposit of 3 million yen.

The man’s claim was that this violates

the constitutional guarantee of equality.

And I sort of agree with that as a philosophy.

If you have to pay 3 million yen to run for office,

then only people with 3 million extra yen can run for office.

In which case, if you are of, you know, strict means,

if you’re poor, you’re not allowed to run for office, which is unfair.

I don’t know what the 3 million, it says deposit.

So maybe you get it back if you fail, I’m not sure.

But it seems interesting that I actually agree with kind of his claim.

He also submitted a letter opposing Abe State funeral.

Now I was actually against the State

funeral when I found out how much it cost.

I wasn’t against the State funeral because Abe was a prime minister.

He, whether you agree or not with his politics, he did work for the country.

And what he believed was the best way.

Whether or not you agreed with Abe’s politics,

he was doing what he thought was best for the country.

He was a state official for a very long time.

So I didn’t have a problem with the State funeral.

And then I found out how much they cost.

And I was like, the taxpayer shouldn’t be paying that much.

Abe in the government want to want a State funeral.

So he submitted a letter opposing Abe State funeral because it was forced

through and not Democratic.

So my problem with the State funeral was how much they cost because the

taxpayer shouldn’t be

footing that bill. The government wants to do that. They should find some

other source.

The family should pay for it. Donation, something like that.

Off you go.

He’s saying that the people didn’t get to vote on the State funeral.

And therefore it wasn’t Democratic. And that made him upset.

He is a failed politician.

And I think the thing is, so he wanted democracy and he says he wants to be

a politician and he

wanted things to be done right. But he’s also failed in his ideals because a

great politician or

whatnot, they would not use a pipe bomb to push their ideas through. So that

‘s the unfortunate

reality is this man has failed in two ways. He’s failed as a politician and

he’s also failed

to live up to his own ideals as what he claims a politician should be.

So since there was a pipe bomb thrown and last year Prime Minister Abe was


campaign speeches will only happen indoors now. So they’re not, they used to

do, this is actually

what I thought was quite sad about this whole thing. They had politicians

with the Prime Minister

very high level people out walking amongst the people, talking to people in

crowds and they were

all safe. It was all good. The secret service in Japan were primarily

trained to stop knife attacks,

which is why the home made shotgun actually worked and why the pipe bomb,

like it got really close

to the Prime Minister. The guy, the security guy I saw in the video, he

actually did his job properly.

But you know, also it shouldn’t have happened in the first place. So now

they’ve decided like we’ve

had one politician murdered another one attacked. We can’t keep going like

this. They want to create

a controlled environment for these sort of speeches. So they’re all going to

be happening indoors.

now. There will be metal detectors and every all the bags we get checked

before he can come in.

Street speeches will still happen. So what happens in Japan is these vans go

around and then they

stop and then they stand on top of the Van and they get a microphone with

these loud speakers

and they give a speech from the top of the Van. Those will still happen but.

they’re going to have a

sheet of bulletproof glass up in front of them. So I guess that’s not too

much of a difference because

the guy standing up there, he was quite far away anyways. You weren’t going

to get that close to him.

The bulletproof glass isn’t going to be much of a change, but it is sad that

we’ve had to actually

do that in a country where again a year ago, Abe, the prime minister,

whatever they were walking

around in crowds of people shaking their hands and like talking to people

and just being in and

amongst the people was really nice. They’re going to enforce like a 20 meter

space away from the Van

to make it just that much harder to get sort of leave you want to throw a

pipe bomb let’s say.

It’s going to you’re going to have to be able to throw at least 20 meters to

get your job done.

But it’s I’m a bit disappointed that’s had to happen because it’s like this.

violence is changing the

nature of politics in Japan, which is too

bad. Now on to more honestly more in the

news, Japan style news and the LDP official, so the liberal Democratic party

official. He’s up,

talking up one of his co-workers. There’s

sort of campaigns going on right now.

And he says, “Oh, I’m talking about my friend and then I start talking about

his wife and then the

rival, the rival of his friend as a woman.” He says, “I’m glad she’s not

really pretty either.”.

So he’s basically saying like, “Here’s my friend, his wife is hot, his.

competition, she’s not hot.”

So vote for my friend. He’s obviously a better person because he’s got the

hotter wife. This of course.

sexist and it’s going to piss people off. So the complaint was that his

comments damaged her dignity.

He later retracted his statement. So he made the remark and then the guy was

interviewing him and they.

said like, “Did you mean to insult her dignity? Did you mean that she was

unattractive?” He said, “No,

I totally do her.” But of course that’s not what he said. That’s actually

what I wish he said. I

wish he actually doubled down on it. He retracted his statement and he said,

“I said it inadvertently.

I retract everything. I apologize for offending the dignity of both.” So he

‘s talking about both the

rival and the man’s wife. But then he said, “Come on, she’s got a bit of a

hog face.” I just sat there going

like, “Okay, I’ve talked about this so many times. I actually think I have

to stop talking about it.”

Retracting statements. It’s not like the thing he said goes away because of

it. The apology means

nothing. I don’t get how this is acceptable. There’s almost no fallout and

no responsibility for the

dumb shit politician say. But it happens all the time and they say the dumb

shit. You just don’t

comment on people’s looks. And yet, when I think back to Trump, that’s his

whole deal. It’s commenting

on people’s appearance and their attitudes and what they’re like. So maybe

just politics have changed.

Certainly, Trump has changed the landscape of politics in America. But has.

it had an impact over

here? Because, no, because again, like five years ago, I was still doing the

Ninja News Japan.

And they were all saying racist stuff. So I guess they’ve just shifted. They

don’t say the racist stuff

out loud like they used to. They still get away with misogyny. And they’re

going to get away with that.

But now people are calling them out from misogyny. So I guess that’s going

to be on the chopping block

next. Politicians in Japan, they’re being held to a much higher standard.

Like the stuff Trump says,

he would not be able to get away with it in Japan. Like it just would not

fly. He would not be a.

successful politician. There is a group that supposed to promote gender

equality. And they had a

poster. And it was up about consent. And it had the first picture. And the

guy’s like, “Mm, she’s

into me.” And then the second picture was her going, “Ooh, I’m not into him

.” And it was about,

you know, you have to get consent before you start to do stuff to other

people. The problem is that

promotes the gender stereotype that a) men are the aggressors. Men are not

capable of reading

the signals of women. They don’t understand women. And that they are always

at fault in these sort

of sexual relations. It doesn’t suggest that the woman should get consent

from the man. It only

suggested that the man should get consent from the woman. So that is

promoting gender stereotypes.

In a group that is supposed to be promoting gender equality, they should.

know better. So the people

started complaining. So they took down the poster. And then they started

saying, “Oh, not only does it

promote gender stereotypes, it also has copied the art style of another

artist.” So they took

all the posters down. The company,

the group, the gender equality group said.

, “We apologize

publicly, so there’s your public apology.”

But then they blamed the printing company.

Not to actually take responsibility for you shit. That’s not cool. The

artist who is sort of the

one being, you know, copied in this case said that the apology and taking

down the posters is enough.

I don’t know. It’s weird that gender equality

in Japan still means gender stereotypes.

just that men should behave better.

But again, that is the gender stereotype.

that is being promoted.

Yeah, it’s almost like people don’t know what gender equality is. This is

Japan. I would say when

it comes to gender equality, LGBT rights and stuff like that, Japan is

decades behind other countries,

Western countries. Like just even the equal rights men and women still aren

‘t there. Because I mean,

that guy just got away with saying that this other politician had a hog

phase. I’ve never seen a

picture of either of them, so I can’t really comment. It’s that low-key mis

ogyny that is just a

part of Japanese culture. And people, I think they come to Japan and they

have weird expectations

of what it’s going to be like. And I don’t think they realize, there’s a

whole generation that’s

still in charge that has not changed their thinking from the 1960s. And it’s

going to take another

generation or two before it goes away. There’s a man called “Boys Over

Flowers.” I’d never heard of it.

And then I found out it has the highest circulation comic series for girls

by a single author. It’s in

the Guinness Book of World Records. But then I was like, that is a very

specific. This is one of the

things about world records. It’s how specific the world records are. So the

highest circulation of

a comic series, that’s good. Four girls, okay, you’ve now just split out at

least two so that you

split it in half. So there should be the highest circulation comic series

for boys by a single author.

That one sort of makes sense. Because if it’s

a team, it wouldn’t have the same impact.

So I was like, because it’s a world

record, I could publish a comic series for.

white 50-year-old men with beards and get 100 people to buy it. And that

would probably be the

highest circulation comic series for white 50-year-old men with beards by a

single author. Maybe that could

get in the Guinness Book of World Records. Because that is how you finesse

world records sometimes. It’s

actually get something so specific. No one else is attempted to try it yet.

But then I saw she has.

59.4 million copies of her comic in circulation. Those are physical comics.

So like if you had a

comic on like an ebook or something, that would encounter. And I was like 54

, 59.4 million copies is a

lot. It just says physical copies published. It doesn’t say bought. So could

I do a self-run of 60 million.

comics of a series that I have written for girls by me and beat that record

if I didn’t sell any?

The very interesting question because technically I think I could beat the

world record. Since we’re talking

about world records, I have the number one highest rated karaoke version of

House of Pain’s Jump

Around in Japan. So we have a switch and my daughter wanted to do karaoke

and they have a thing,

a company called Joy Sound. And they do karaoke machines. And so they have

an app where you can do

karaoke through the switch. So her and her friends came over and did it and

they were on it. Me to do

an English song and I was like, this is going to be really bad. I only know

the words to like three

songs. And one of them is jump around. That came out when I was like in my

20s. So I did it. I got like

69% or something like that. And then it goes number one in Japan. I had this

like big fanfare and

everyone was super excited. And I was like, oh wait, I’m the only person in

Japan to have ever attempted

this song. That’s how I got the world record. Are the the national record.

Now back, way, way back,

I was the, I was doing video game reviews and an app came out and it was.

called poop ride. So it was

P-O-O-P-R-I-D-E. So either it was poo, P-O-O, Pride, P-R-I-D-E or poop, P-O-

O-P, ride, R-I-D-E. And it was this.

little game where you had poop and you slid it along the floor and you had

to get it enough power to

touch the line. But you didn’t want to go over the line. So whoever got to

the closest to the line one.

Now because I was doing video game reviews, I got the earliest version of it

on release day,

had to play it for a few hours, leveled up really fast, actually came up

with some strategies for it,

wrote my article. And then as I put the app down, I checked the rankings. I

was number one in the world.

So I have held both a national Japanese record and a world record. I’ve

never gone back to poop ride

to see if that record has been broken. I do believe Mr. Warm Hands purpose

fully went onto.

the Joy Sound app and with his kids and did jump around and I do believe he

beat my score. He may be

the number one in Japan now. But I held that record for years, mid-pandemic.

So at least two years now,

I’ve had the record for I should go back and do it again because I wasn’t

even trying. Imagine if I drop.

So the Osaka court had to pay $375,000 yen. That’s like $3,000, $4,000 to a

former inmate and his attorney

because they wouldn’t allow him to wear sunglasses while he was in a

detention facility and in prison.

So at first I thought this was a Yakuza guy who and they wear sunglasses.

They just wear sunglasses

all the time. I actually have a friend who married into a family that was

sort of extended family

was all the Yakuza and they said at the wedding, one side of the room was

all wearing sunglasses the whole

time. So this is a Yakuza thing. So that’s what I thought when I read the

article of the title and then

I went read the actual thing and I was like, “Oh, it’s actually quite

different.” So this guy usually wears

light purple glasses because of a light sensitivity. There’s actually a

really famous comedian

in Japan and he wore sunglasses all the time. His name is Tamori I think.

And it’s because he had

light sensitivity to his eye. So he wore sunglasses all the time because the

lights on the TV.

shows were too bright for his eye. It’s an actually constant pain. Now they

said you’re not aware

of loud to wear glasses in prison. So they wouldn’t let his wear his glasses

but that actually means

he wasn’t able to read documents and the light was so harsh like it would

cause some physical pain

and it made everything like he was told to do much harder because he wasn’t

allowed to wear it.

This wasn’t just like because he wanted to look cool. This was essentially


medically necessary glasses. He had to carry out his sentence without

corrective lenses as the.

way he was phrased. The detention house says you can have shades that allow

up to 25 percent

blockage. In prison, colorless glasses are only allowed if there’s a medical

reason. But it seems

like this guy had a medical reason but they didn’t allow him to wear his

glasses in prison because

they thought oh this guy wants to be cool just like my assumption. We’re

going to say no but they’re

actually like violating sort of fundamental human rights. So you got to pay

up. 4000 bucks though.

So you think about like a lot of the stories where people sue each other.

The numbers are very small.

In America, something like this would be massive. It’s because Japan is just

not as litigious. And one

of the reasons are not as litigious is because the awards are so much

smaller than in America. I bet in

America if I went to prison and they said Peter is not allowed to wear his

corrective lens. So I’m

essentially blind the whole time I’m in prison making everything more

difficult. I bet I could sue them

and I get millions of dollars. In Japan, 4000 bucks shared out with my

attorney. I mean sometimes

you got wonder if it’s even worth it. But I think a lot of times in Japan

you sue them for the moral issue.

Not so much for the money. So there’s a new Pokemon show. Now I don’t follow

Pokemon. I do remember all

the conversations about you have like a 12 year old boy who never goes to

school who goes around

battling animals. And it was a lot of memes actually when I was in my

university and later day.

Because people were talking about the lifestyle of a Pokemon master. Zero

education beyond elementary

school basically. There was a lot of jokes online and I enjoyed them because

conceptually it was

quite interesting. The new hero it’s called Liko. Liko joins the school

which apparently Ash did

and then just never showed up like went to school and then was like well I’m

going to go be Pokemon

master. Bye. And then took off for the rest of his life. Liko joins the

school but then takes lessons

remotely which I found very interesting because they’ve really updated it so

they do have the child hero

who’s going to go around and do their adventures with their Pokemon. But.

actually still technically

get education. The only thing I can think is a problem is how many hours a

day are they expected to do.

these lessons remotely. How much are they going to show without online. But

they’re actually using a

tablet again updating the technology of Pokemon. They’re they’re they’re

they’re going to wonder

if they’re going to how much they’re going to actually bother with this

showing them actually doing

this. But one of the comments I really enjoyed was I hope Liko has an

unlimited data plan because

of course they’re not going to be hanging around somewhere where there’s Wi-

Fi all the time. It’s

a bit ridiculous. But I do like that they’re showing the kids like yeah even

our Pokemon heroes they.

still have to go to school. Okay so this is a new kind of harassment. So

Japan has a billion kinds of

harassment. So there was Seku Harada which is sexual harassment. There was

Paohara. Paohara harassment.

They’re actually using the English and then condensing it into a Japanese.

Then I learned about

I forget it was Akahara which is Akachana so that means baby. Maybe I might

have that one wrong. But

anyways there’s essentially maternity harassment. So you get pregnant and

then you’re pushed out of.

your company. I found a new one through an article today called Owa Harada

and Owa Di is finished. So

Owa Harada is finishing harassment and this has to do with recent graduates

looking for jobs. So they do

kind of graduate recruitment. All the companies every year when the students

graduate they do recruitment.

cycles. And they try to get new employees. In Japan again having fewer and

fewer young people they

need the competition for companies to get more young people to join their

company is part of keeping

their company alive. The competition is quite serious. Owa Harada. Owa Har.

Ada. What Owa Harada is. It’s

really hard to switch between English and Japanese like in one word. Is you

‘ve come and interviewed with

our company. We want you to stop. That’s the Owa Di part looking at other

companies. But we want

you to make a promise to stop looking for other companies. But that is

essentially saying to the

graduate recruit person looking for a job that we want you to limit your

options and only join our

company. We want you to stop looking because what if you find a better deal

if you find a better deal

you might take that job and not our job. So they try to get them to sign

letters of acceptance saying

like here’s a letter that says I will accept the proposed job that not the

actual job. So they’re

saying we’re not going to give you a contract right now to sign. We want you

to sign this letter that

says you’re not going to look for other jobs and then later down the line we

‘ll give you a contract

which is bullshit. If you’re not signing a contract it doesn’t mean anything

because they could say

we’re going to pay you millions dollars and then the contracts get slid

across the table. It’s got five

bucks on it. But you haven’t been looking for any other jobs where you could

have also got paid

millions dollars really unfair. They also require them to attend company

social gatherings and what

they’ve done is tried to make enough of these company social gatherings that

it’s difficult for you

to go out and find other jobs. So the government’s asking companies to stop

this. Now asking isn’t a

very strong thing but there was a survey done in 2021.10% of the students

said the experienced

“awada, awada hara.” Okay I’m getting it. “awada hara.” And then 10% oh 64%

of the 10% say they ended their

job search because of awada hara. 42.3% had received demands to provide a

letter of acceptance. So almost

half the people who went out to do recruitment said like really quickly they

were like “sign this

letter saying you’re going to accept a job from us and stop looking for

other jobs.” 11.6% were

harassed persistently. Some cases say they were physically barred from

leaving when they declined

an offer. So they’re like “here we want you to work for our company.” So you

know I’m not into this.

I’m going to go now and they like lock the door and say you can’t leave

until you accept our offer.

Which is of course no way legally going to hold up but they might actually

cause you problems

if you actually like end up signing something to just get out of there. I

would say if you’re ever in

a situation where someone just like you’re at work and then your boss locks

the door and says you

can’t leave until you do something. What you do is just call the police and

you say like I would

like to leave this office and they are not letting me. When the police show

up because that’s kidnapping.

I mean a lot of people don’t think about it but what they’re doing is saying

like you are not physically

able to go where you want under some sort of dress or threat. That’s

kidnapping. It’s illegal in

every Western country, every like sort

of Western legal system I know of. So.

just call the cops and

say like “Hi I’m in this room in this building. I would like to leave and

they’re not letting me leave.”.

You probably could just put this phone

on speakerphone and they’re going to like

have to let you go. Then you could probably sue them afterwards. The most

interesting part of this

though is that there is an article 627 of the civil code. It says even if

you sign a letter of acceptance

you can back out. So even if these companies force you to sign a letter

saying you’re going to accept

the job with their company. Legally you can back out at any time and that

letter doesn’t mean anything.

I find it interesting more though that because this is such a common problem

that it’s actually written

into the civil code. So this has happened so much in the past and they’ve

had so many sort of legal

issues I assume that they just wrote into the civil code that these letters

don’t mean anything and

that you can just back out. You don’t

have to take a job you don’t want to take.

There was a man caught on camera by a passerby who sent OG SONS photo. So OG

SON is an old man in

Japanese. And what this guy does is he takes the short shorts that girls

wear they’re called bloomers.

He takes the short shorts they wear and he wears them around the station and

this guy has a Twitter

account and he’s really proud of this. He wears like Lea Tards. He’s

actually I’m going to say a pretty

fit old dude. Someone took a picture of this guy sent it to his mom and said

oh my god look what I

can see at the station. This woman posted it on the Internet and she said my

younger son sent this.

photo to me saying there was an OG SON wearing bloomers at the station. I

didn’t believe him until he

sent this photo. It’s real. It’s just sick. And then she put pictures over

his face because you can’t

publish other people’s pictures in Japan without getting in trouble and

posted the picture with what

she tweeted on the Internet. The man himself shows up to her Twitter account

and says don’t censor

my face. So this dude he’s not only doing something that’s kind of weird. He

‘s super proud of it which

I love. And then it turns out his whole Twitter account is just full of

these kind of photo. I don’t

know why but this guy is doing the thing that makes him happy. Yes it would

creep me out but at the same

time I’m sure stuff that I like creeps out other people. I know like the jud

o I do. A lot of people

disagree with fighting and like beating the shit out of other people but I.

love it. And yeah

if people said stop I wouldn’t stop. There was a couple comments and one was

three cheers to this man’s

confidence and I got to admit he is super confident. You can really sense

the sort of strong willpower

from the bloomers ojisa. I mean he’s been doing this for nearly 10 years now

. He also says some philosophical

things or tasteful things sometimes on his Twitter. Just don’t actually

commit a crime please.

I’ve seen the man’s Twitter before. He’s actually quite intellectual and

well spoken which makes his

bloomers obsession even weirder which is so true because he’s not an idiot.

He’s not a dumb guy.

He just he knows what makes him happy and he’s living that lifestyle which

again I kind of had a certain

amount of appreciation for. And then the very last comment which I did enjoy

this is what makes Japan.

Japan and that’s a good thing.