A gun without bullets is actually less
dangerous than bullets without a gun.
‘Cause a gun without bullets is just a brick
or a big chunk of metal, which you know,
it could be dangerous
if you hit someone with
it, but bullets are
still tiny explosive.
So you gotta be careful with your bullets.
A police sergeant went for lunch.
Let me turn off this.
And you’d serve her for me.
Yeah, we’re good, okay.
A police sergeant decided it was
lunchtime, and he had his break,
and he went to a supermarket
by a bento or a pre-prepared meal.
Not muting discord, rookie.
Uh, yes, it is a rookie move.
The problem is I’m just so popular that
people are sending me messages all the time.
That’s really what it comes down to.
I actually think a lot of videos
are enhanced with the little bloop,
because it makes it seem
like people care about you.
I’ve changed my side up a bit.
You can see some of
my nerd stuff in the back.
So we have my nooka dark room.
I’ll introduce you to my
room before I continue.
I’m gonna start this story again.
We have the nooka dark
room that I spent way,
too much money for
how bad the alcohol is.
We have a dumba cook,
and then we have a little
warhammer 40K guy
that my friend made me.
Look at that.
He actually did a really good job.
You can get it in the right in the middle,
and maybe it’ll focus, it probably won’t.
I have to pull it back a bit.
You can’t see the details.
The whole point of these
things is the details, right?
So my friend that made that for me.
Since I have this space,
I ordered a touch coma, and
that’s gonna come, and then
in a couple months, I have
a slayer of a story coming.
So, that’s the excitement of this
space is going to now be my nerd space
because I figure that’ll
look good on camera.
Let’s start again with Ninja News Japan.
That is probably the third or
fourth fall start I’ve had this morning.
What I wanna start with today is
to say, I want everyone to know that
the guns without bullets are actually
less dangerous than bullets without guns.
I’m really gonna get this
out there today in the world,
because the gun without bullets is
just a hunk of metal a brick essentially,
whereas bullets without
guns are still tiny explosives
that could explode in your
hand or face or anywhere else.
Police Sergeant went to get lunch.
He went to get a bento, so
he went to the supermarket
and get a bento or
pre-prepared lunch, it’s very nice.
And some point during his trip to the
supermarket, he dropped a bag of ammunition.
Now, most people were
like, oh, he dropped his
ammunition, he lost his
ammunition, that’s really bad.
I’m like, bag.
For me, the optimal word in this, the
problematic word was bag of ammunition.
‘Cause it implies a loose bag of bullets.
A bag of loose bullets, I guess, is the
correct sentence I wanted to make just now.
Which to me just seems insane.
I always imagine bullets
is being very well kept.
So boxes with each one
standing up in its own little place.
Or, you know, like cowboys had a
belt in each bullet went into its own slot.
That is my image of how to
care for and handle bullets.
It seems, Japanese police
officers are, if not regularly,
irregularly, given hopefully
small bags of ammunition.
So on July 15th, this police
officer lost his bag of ammunition.
And I’m gonna say that a lot because
that’s the bit that blows my mind.
Then, noticed on July
16th, so the next day
he noticed, hey, my bag
of ammunition is gone.
My first thought when they said bag
of ammunition was actually Ziploc bag.
But the story employee who found the bag
didn’t know he was carrying live ammunition.
So it’s clearly not see through.
I’m hoping at least has Velcro on the top.
I don’t know, but they didn’t look in
the bag, which was kind of respectful.
I thought that was all right.
So he goes back.
The sergeant’s like, oh, I’ve
lost my bag of ammunition.
So he goes back, retrace his steps.
He goes back to the supermarket
and says, hey, did I drop a bag?
I’m gonna just leave out
of ammunition part here.
Did I drop a bag here in
the lost and found and go,
yeah, we do have a bag that matches the
description of your bag and he gets it back.
I don’t know how much
trouble you get in for for that.
But I always enjoy what I
learned things about rules in Japan.
I don’t know if this seems
other countries, but apparently
you’re giving your gun
an ammunition separately.
That sort of makes sense.
And Japan they use revolvers.
So again, my imagination, if you
said they gave him ammunition,
it would have been in
a box with each bullet
up in foam or something
to make sure they don’t
bump into each other and go off.
Well, no, they give you a bag of ammunition
and then you’re supposed
to put the bullets in your gun.
And then you’re only supposed
to carry around your gun
with bullets in it as you go out
and do your duties during the day.
So he had decided it’s not
worth putting my bullets in my gun.
A, showing how safe a country Japan is
that this cop didn’t think
his gun needed bullets.
But B, shows how dangerous
it gets if you’re complacent
because he was carrying
around loose bullets in a
bag all day and then leaving
them in grocery stores.
They also come just stacked
on top of each other in a box.
I know that’s the
reality, but it just, I don’t,
I don’t want people to kill
themselves by accident or on purpose.
So it’s just weird.
It’s weird that people like
bullets are inherently dangerous.
That’s kind of my point.
So they shouldn’t be
handled all wheeling really.
A loose bag of bullets
seems like a bad idea.
So the reason for putting
your bullets in your gun
is that the gun actually
has a cable attached
to the police officer’s belt, which
means it’s very hard to steal a cop’s gun.
Now it’s still possible,
but it’s difficult.
If I just have a loose bag of ammunition
and someone grabs my loose bag of ammunition,
that’s actually quite easy to steal.
And then also they’re
actually if they have like a
safety zone the gun and
stuff is less likely to go off.
The secondary issue
is if this police officer
was in a situation where he
actually had to use his gun that day,
he would have been like, oh,
excuse me, incredibly dangerous,
Kremel who I need to
shoot right now, a timeout.
Let me just get my
little bag of ammunition.
I’ll just, I’ll take two.
Go, two bullets, let me
put them in my gun just now.
Okay, we’re now freeze.
I mean, that seems to be the
situation they were in in this moment.
He’s been reprimanded, fair.
But I know, I guess it is
nice that we live in a country
where cops don’t feel they
even have to load their guns.
So I actually just purchased a new car.
It’s very nice.
My old car will be recycled.
I just bought a new car, which is great.
It’s a hybrid.
I would want it to move
more, a little more greenhouse.
I want to do more, but there
weren’t charging stations and stuff.
It’s not really feasible right now.
It’s too bad.
My old car is going to be recycled.
Now recycled in Japan actually
means they’re going to fix it up.
Now what car runs fine is just
the taxation system in Japan
has made it so that after a certain
period, our car is 13 years old.
After a certain period,
the taxes are so high.
It’s actually cheaper to buy a new
car than to maintain your old car.
And so they take these old cars.
They fix them up.
They clean them up.
And they usually somewhere,
send them somewhere else
and resell them somewhere in Asia, usually
like Cambodia or Thailand or something.
You’ll see a lot of
secondhand Japanese cars.
It used to be also Russia, but not anymore.
Because of the export bands,
they’re now including used cars.
So last year, it was a luxury band.
So any luxury item from Japan
could not be exported to Russia.
Used cars were included if
they were 6 million yen or over.
So it had to be a pretty good luxury car
to be where 6 million
yen as a secondhand car.
This band has been expanded to any used car
with an engine over
1900 cc’s, hybrids, or EVs.
So any good car that could actually– you
could do stuff with
other than just transport
yourself is now not going
to be exported to Russia.
You can still get really,
really small compact cars.
But I’m assuming it goes engines.
You can’t turn into weapons of mass
destruction or like mount guns on them.
I don’t know the reasoning.
I figured if you’re going to do an export
band to a country, you just blanket band.
But then also, companies still
need to make their money and stuff.
So I’m a little torn.
I’m on all-in-nothing kind of guy
when it comes to let’s deal with Russia.
And honestly, I wouldn’t even
give him my under 1900 cc ex-ins.
Because who knows what
they’re going to do with them?
They’re clearly not in good
shape right now, mentally.
I don’t know.
Can you say a country is
not in good shape mentally?
Certainly the leadership.
What we’ll go with that.
OK, this was interesting.
I’m a content creator of sorts.
I create content by spitting into
this microphone on a regular basis.
Not bars, just flam.
There was an interesting
thing went up on the Internet.
And it was a creator who works
for Subaru Diata productions.
And they make Ultraman.
That’s kind of the most important thing.
And he went on the Internet
and he said, hey, big fans
of Ultraman, please don’t
send in your ideas to me.
Which is weird, because you’d be like all
the fans are very excited about Ultraman.
They send you all their
cool ideas for Ultraman.
You could use the ideas.
That’s the problem.
That’s actually the problem.
You’ve hit upon it.
The designer, one of the character
designers for Street Fighter,
came in and said, yeah, don’t send
in your design ideas, to Street Fighter.
And so this was almost snowballing.
All these other very serious professional
creators, I’m not one of those.
All those very serious professional creators
were saying, don’t send me your ideas.
The guy who’s in charge
of the Gundam manga,
he said he’s received
complaints in the past,
because he’s like a
fan is sent in an idea.
And then in some point, at some
later point, he’s done a similar idea.
Because again, we’re talking
about giant space robots.
How many actual ideas
are you going to have?
Well, I have an idea.
The giant space robot goes into space.
And if it’s another new giant
space robot, well, he did that story.
The guy who sent in that story
was like, hey, dude, you took my story.
You didn’t credit me.
You didn’t compensate me.
You didn’t even say thank you.
He’s like, well, I didn’t use your story.
We just happened to be in
the same genre of stories.
So the concern is that
if you send in your story,
and they don’t even
look at it, they don’t use it,
what’s going to happen is they will
hit on a similar story at a later date.
That similar story is going to be the
problem, because you might try to sue them.
So like, you took my
idea, you used my idea,
you didn’t compensate
me, you didn’t credit me.
I should now be considered a
professional, whatever thing I’ve sent you.
Be it writer, artist, or whatever.
I want my cut.
And so these creators,
these professional designers
and whatnot, they’re saying,
don’t send us your ideas,
because we just don’t want
that problem in the future.
Because let’s face it,
we get so much stuff.
We don’t even look at it anyways.
I have posted several video game ideas and
TV show ideas on the Internet in the past.
And let’s be very honest.
I will sue.
There was a– I– this
story’s not very good.
I actually only did this story because
of the name of the hair removal place.
There’s a male laser hair removal chain.
It’s mostly in Tokyo and Osaka.
It’s called Wolf Clinic.
I don’t know why I really enjoyed that.
A hair removal place
where their logo is like a wolf
howling at the moon covered in
hair, which made me think of werewolf.
And I’m like, ah, you’re a werewolf.
But you, if you do, laser hair
removal, you’re not a werewolf anymore.
But you still maintain the vigor,
the vitality, that is the werewolf.
Probably reading into it a
bit of being really honest.
They suspended services in April.
They have received 700 complaints.
I was interested also on the pricing.
The average cost for hair removal,
laser hair removal, is 210,000 yen.
So it’s like 2,000 bucks, let’s say.
It’s like probably 1,700,
something like that.
If you want, this one man was complaining
that he didn’t get his
total body hair removal.
So I was like total implies all the
hair in your body head, face, body.
But I’m assuming he
actually means like, chin down.
So his chest, legs, exciting areas.
How much does that cost?
There’s an interesting question.
How much does it cost to get all
the body hair on your body removed?
It’s 400,000 yen.
So hair removal, non-specific,
the average was 210,000 yen.
I’m assuming that’s going
to be like chest and back.
And I got, I got some, I got some
weird shoulder hair growing in.
I could get them laser off.
I’d be pretty happy about that.
The problem is the company’s
going into bankruptcy.
So a lot of these guys
might be, they paid to have
their body hair removed and they’re
not getting their body hair removed.
I, I feel some sympathy
but wolf body hair removal.
I was just a great name.
Speaking of great names, if you are named.
So I have a thing about when the
police give a nickname to a thing.
400,000, per session or
for a hundred dollars of
a 10-year-old, 10-year-old,
And I’m going to make
a, I’m going to make
a, I’m going to make
a, I’m going to make the
assumption that that
means multiple sessions.
So it’s like, they’re actually charging,
I guess, for a square inch of body.
So like you want to have your torso lazored,
that’s going to cost this much money.
You want to have your legs lazored.
That’s going to cost so much money.
That’s a crazy good deal.
I don’t know.
I’ve never looked into hair removal.
Again, I just said I, I do it.
I have some really, I have
really gross chest hair.
This is now going to be a
confessional about my body shaming.
I have nipples.
That’s my confession.
I, Peter, of an engineer’s depend.
I have nipples.
I have like octopus hairs,
like the just little straggly ones.
And then I have like a patch in the middle.
I would actually love
to get those lazored off.
I was being honest.
I’m one of those white
people who has really thick
hair on his beard, losing my hair
up top and patchy hair on my body.
I don’t mind losing my hair.
I don’t really care about the beard.
It’s just okay.
It’s, it’s nice.
The patchy hair, if it was
even, if it was like consistent.
Patchy hair is gross.
I think we can all agree.
If I had the extra money, I’d go to wolf.
Well, I guess not because
they’re going bankrupt.
I would get some hair laser hair
treatment and get that, that taken off.
I was going to talk about a bear.
I’ve gone from wolves to bears.
There is a gigantic bear that is in
Hokkaido has been killing and eating cows.
Now that doesn’t apply if you say that way.
It’s eating the entire cow,
which I don’t think is true.
But it has 66, it has attacked 66
cows and killed 32, eaten most of them.
The bear is gigantic.
And they’ve given it a
name, OSO 18, so also 18.
And I don’t know.
I have this thing like when
cops give a criminal nickname.
That’s not usually as cool as the movies.
The comp hits our like $150
per session, and you need like 10.
Teets in the chat still on the hair.
Arm pits are like $150 per session
in the US, and you need 10 sessions.
Just for your armpits.
I don’t know.
It couldn’t have been
$400,000 yen per session.
It must have been a block of sessions.
It just must have been.
Like I get, I didn’t look into
the actual programs they offered,
because they’re going
bankrupt, so I couldn’t
even get it even if I
was vaguely interested
for no nipple-oriented
Let’s just be clear on that.
There’s a big bear.
The total cost for hair, laser removal for
a bear is way more than that of a person.
Because there’s nothing else to that story.
There’s just a really big
bear, and I really like bears.
Bears are cool.
Since we’re talking about big things, I’m
now trying to find– I’ll stop doing it.
No, don’t do it.
D-mailing is fun.
What I’m hoping the evolution of
this podcast would be, I tell a story.
We have a chat conversation.
I tell a story.
We have a chat conversation.
So please feel free to do it.
Because if the chat’s
no good, I can delete it.
Like that’s the editing
process for when this goes out.
So I have that power of
if it’s a fun conversation.
We have the fun conversation.
If it’s not a fun conversation, it’s going.
I mean, that’s just the beauty of editing.
As we can sit here and dick
around as much as we want.
I need to learn a certain
level of professionalism as well.
I need to learn to
know when to just power
through the story, and
then deal with the chat.
Whereas the thing is, I’m
actually all excited about the chat.
And I want to talk to
both at the same time.
So this is a skill I
need to teach myself is
when to do story, when
to stop, when to do chat.
Should I go back or
should I just keep going?
That kind of thing.
Ignatius called me a dick.
I assume the laser hairdreaming
for your dick is quite expensive.
So I’m helping.
Of course you’re helping.
You’re giving me a level of
enthusiasm I would not get by myself.
Even if I cut out all the chat
bits, the enjoyment level on my side
and the enthusiasm that
that would create goes up.
Hey, think about that.
2000 peaches were stolen
from a Fukushima orchard.
Of course they were stolen at night.
And I was just like, holy
shit, that’s a lot of peaches.
30 trees and the peaches
are very sought after.
If you know anything about
fruit in Japan, fruit in Japan
is very expensive, but
then they have special fruit.
They always have these areas
and this area is famous for apples.
And this area is famous for peaches.
These peaches would be worth.
2000 peaches would be
worth at least 650,000 yen.
It was weird to me.
I’m like, I guess you can’t
have orchard security.
Must be a really hard thing to organize.
Because they put up fences
and stuff, but I mean you
could just take a truck
and roll through a fence.
And now you have a truck in the
middle of the orchard with all the peaches.
You just gather as many peaches
as you can and drive the truck away.
It’s got to be really hard.
Last year or previous years we had
Apple theft stories and similar stories.
So it seems like this is an ongoing issue.
Police have stepped up
patrols because the actual
harvest time for peaches
is an August in Japan.
But they got a couple
weeks early and I guess
they’re going to hold on to those
peaches and then sell them in a later date.
They would have ripened
by then to a degree.
But this is actually
a… It’s weird.
I was like, how do you
protect your peaches?
Okay, the Abbeis assassination.
This mare of the town
had happened and he
was like, we should put
up a memorial statue.
And then the people in the town were
like, nah man, we don’t want a memorial
statue because we don’t really
want to be reminded that this
prime minister was assassinated
in our town all the time.
So, can we do something else?
And the man was like, ah,
the people are kind of right.
I protect my peach by wearing pants.
I am only being videoed
and chest up at the moment.
So who knows if my peaches
protected at the moment?
So the people in this town are
saying they don’t want a statue.
They don’t want a statue to Abbeis.
They don’t want to be reminded
that he was assassinated in
their town every single day
when they walk around this area.
So the man was like,
okay, we’ll compromise.
We put in a flower bed.
And then anyone who would
like to visit the flower bed could,
you know, put a memorial
thing there, you know, whatever.
People do when they have memorial things.
So one citizen was like, no, I want
the statue that was originally proposed.
I actually was like, this
is a very reasonable mare.
You had an idea.
He brought up to the people.
The people said no, he
didn’t go like, well, I’m the man.
I’m doing what I want.
He’s like, oh, I represent the people.
The people said they don’t want it.
I’ll do something else.
I think the flower bed is a very
good compromise because it does
give you a place to memorialize
this event and remember the person.
But it also doesn’t remind
everyone all day every
day that this terrible thing
happened in their town.
This is one guy was like,
nah, I want a big-ass statue.
So he decided that this would be the
appropriate way to change the mare’s mind.
Who do you think you
are opposing the erection
of former Prime
Minister Abe’s memorial?
I will send scumblike
you to the afterlife soon.
So I hope you’re ready.
That, if you haven’t figured
out already, is a death threat.
So you have a man who
was murdered in a town.
And then the mare said, I want to put
up a statue as a memorial to this man.
And the town said, we don’t
really want this memorial.
And he said, well, let’s find a compromise.
We’ll do something else that
can sort of keep everyone happy.
He finds that solution.
There’s one guy’s like, I don’t like that.
I’m going to kill you.
Would you think that’s a good idea?
Because the police don’t.
Also, he did it online from
his phone through a forum
that was like to give
feedback to the government.
So he was found pretty
quickly and arrested.
When it was arrested, he
said, I thought the mare would
change his mind if I
bombarded him with harsh words.
I have caused him a great deal of trouble.
Yes, you have.
You’ve actually, what you’ve
really done is caused yourself a great
deal of trouble because now you’re
being arrested for death threats.
Do you have ants?
I’m assuming in your
country you do, but if
you have ants in your
house, what do you do?
He actually did a very Japanese thing.
There’s this powder you put around.
You do like a border around your house.
I spent one morning just putting
this little… It looks like salt.
I don’t know if it’s pesticide
because it didn’t seem to do anything.
But you put this powder
all around the house.
You were supposed to keep the
ants from getting into the house.
They wouldn’t cross this border.
I can’t really explain what happened.
I guess it probably wasn’t
pesticide of some sort.
If you have a house that you own
and you’re fixing it up and you have ants,
you know the word saying that when you have
a hammer, everything looks like an ale.
I think I just said an ale.
I was in a beer.
That’s not correct.
When you have a hammer,
everything looks like an ale.
I assume this is applicable
to almost every implement.
So therefore, if you have a blow torch,
every ant looks like something you can burn.
So this man has a house.
He doesn’t live there.
It’s just his property and he’s
fixing it up and he sees some ants.
And he has a blow torch.
He’s like, “Huh, I know
how to get rid of these ants.”
So he starts blowtorching the ants.
Leaves the house weirdly the
house burns down that night.
The police and fire department show up.
They put out the fire.
No one’s hurt because again, no one
actually lives in this house at the moment.
Luckily, no neighbor’s house
is caught on fire as well.
The fire and the police
department, I really like this.
After they spoke to the
men, they are investigating the
cause of the fire despite the
fact that the man has admitting
to using a blow torch to
kill ants inside the house.
So your Ninja Ninja
Japan advice for today is
don’t use blow torch for
That might be the title of the episode.
Okay, last story.
It sounds like a joke.
So that’s what got my intention.
The more I got into this story,
the weirder it was, which I did enjoy.
If former chief priest,
so I have a temple and a
broke into a woman’s home,
the priest knew the woman and he
had sort of a one-sided love for her.
So she didn’t love him.
He loved her.
They broke into her house and
they stole 19 million yen and cash.
First of all, I don’t have 19 million
yen in cash to keep in my house.
I’m already a bit jelly of this lady.
The priest was in love with the
woman and he hired the private
investigator who says he
specialized in breaking up couples,
which I didn’t think was a subset of
skills that private investigators had.
So you could hire this guy to try to
break up couples in the hopes that you
can get one member of the couple
that you’re interested in to be with you.
So is that private investigation?
I guess you would need, if you want to be good at
breaking up a couple, you would need to do some private
investigating to find out what would break them up
in order to then implement a plan to break them up.
So I guess it could
fall into, this is like evil
private detecting, or at
least it certainly immoral.
So they broke into the house to steal the
money and then they were also breaking into
the house to steal back all the gifts that
the priest had given to the woman in the past.
So he’d been like, I love you.
Here’s a Prada bag. I love you. Here’s
a coach bag. I’m just using
bags. I know that ladies like bags.
And then they’re like,
holy, I’ve given this lady a
lot of bags and she hasn’t,
you know, put out yet.
I don’t know what he was
actually expecting. He hasn’t,
he hasn’t left her husband
for me because I gave her bags.
So, oh, my bags bags.
We bring in, they get the bags.
Or they actually say they only
say they got the money. So they look
for the bags. I bet the woman
was smart. I’ve just realized this now.
I bet the woman sold the bags. I bet
this is what Hostess is doing, Host Clubs.
This was a whole thing I
learned about. So let’s say
I’m a Hostess in a club and
I have many male suitors.
What I do is for my birthday, I say, I
want this very specific brand of Rolex.
And then three or four of the guys
will all give me the same Rolex because
I’ve been, you know, I’ve been
very specific about which one I want.
I like the serial number,
the code or whatever
it would be. And
the color, everything.
So I get the same watch three, four times.
I will keep one and wear it and say it’s the
one you gave me, the one you gave me, the one
you gave me, and I’ll take the three extras.
And I go sell them for the money. That’s
a good move. This lady probably did a lower
level of that where this priest was giving
her, I am going to assume unwanted gifts.
And she took those gifts
and she sold them. So that’s
probably why they didn’t
find the bags in the house.
But they did manage to find
19 million yen. Maybe she sold
them for 19 million cash and
that’s what they picked up.
They went back again. So this first thing to get
the money back wasn’t enough because the lady still
hadn’t broken up with her boyfriend or husband,
whoever it was. I’m pretty sure it was husband.
So they’re like, we got to, we can’t give up. So
the priest has an idea and he goes to the private
and he says, we’ll break into their house, we’ll
plant some marijuana. The husband will get arrested.
That will surely break them up. And then
I can swoop her off her feet with obviously
the massive amount of charm I have having
come up with these schemes in the first place.
So he’s, oh, I had the quote, if
you plant cannabis in their home, the
woman’s husband would get arrested
and the two would likely separate.
It is interesting that he assumes only the man is going to get
caught for marijuana possession because if it’s in the house, it’s
actually legally possible that either party is guilty. The woman,
I’m, you know, very egalitarian. I believe in equal rights.
So I also believe in equal ability to
commit crime. So as a cop, I wouldn’t
walk in and go, here’s some marijuana.
That man must have committed a crime.
I would be here some marijuana. There’s
two people who live here. At least one
of these people committed a crime. Maybe
even both. Maybe they smoke it together.
It will conceive of both.
This shows sort of the old style
thinking of these, these, these, at least
this priest former priest because of
course he’s in a bit of trouble right now.
So they got caught, they got caught for breaking into
the house once and stealing 19 million yen breaking
into the house a second time and planting marijuana and
even the possession of marijuana is illegal in Japan.
So it’s not only they had
to get it, purchase it, take it
somewhere and plant it. That’s
a whole series of crimes in itself.
This is one step away from a
romantic comedy movie. I’m just waiting
for the rights to come through and
then that’ll be my next big project.