I did a joke at the
end of the last episode,
and it was a story
about a supporter for
a political politician who
wore very, very short skirts.
What I said was I
wasn’t doing that story
just as an exploitative
tactic so that I could
use the picture of a girl’s butt as the
thumbnail for the podcast on YouTube.
And YouTube is not
where this channel thrives.
This is a podcast
first, so almost all the
listeners are on the
podcast, but there is a
YouTube channel, Chuck
Muppy of Chest, YouTube
channel, where you
can see the video of this.
And generally, I know we get
less than 10 views on YouTube.
It’s weird to get 800
to 1000 downloads on
the internet for a podcast and then
put it on YouTube and get like four.
But also not a problem
because, again, that’s
not my focus since I’m
recording it live on Twitch.
I have the video, I might as
well throw the video on YouTube.
It doesn’t hurt me at all, it just
also doesn’t seem to benefit me at all.
With the butt as the thumbnail, the last
episode, I’ll do the last three episodes.
Previous Ninja News Japan got 17
views, the one following that got 17 views.
The last seeming be
got seven views, bottom
butt cheeks, podcast,
Ninja News Japan, 162.
So you can do the
math on the increase in
traffic by just putting
an ass in your thumbnail.
If you want to, now am
I going to do it again?
Probably not.
I don’t, I’m not against
being exploitative
and putting like a chick
with boobies or a butt
on each thumbnail, but also if it’s
not relevant, I’m not going to do it.
So like if it’s in one of the
stories, I would put it up there.
If it was a picture
that I already had or
something like that, but I’m not
going to go out of my way to do it.
So I, there’s a certain
honesty that comes with the
Ninja News Japan podcast
that seem to be podcast.
I’m not exploitative unless I’m
making fun of being exploitative.
So that is an interesting moral
conundrum I’ve set up for myself.
That’s not what we’re talking about
today, I just thought it was interesting.
I could multiply
my traffic by 10 by
sticking an ass in a
thumbnail, which I guess I knew.
I mean, I’m a victim of it.
I see butts and I click on things.
I’m a man and that’s, that’s who I am.
I’m a man.
I’m about to break into salt.
Godzilla.
Learn to cheat.
Learn to cheat.
I know how to cheat.
I’m just not going to do it.
That’s, that’s what it comes down to.
I’m not going to do it.
Uh, Ninja News Japan
actually has a fundamental
level of integrity
that a lot of other
news sources don’t, which I find
really weird because I don’t have to.
I’m not beholden to
anything or anybody
because this is just a
podcast I make a month.
I literally could make up the news
and nothing would actually happen to me.
Then do it.
Lose the integrity.
Uh, maybe we’ll see.
I just have, I could just have like instead
of pictures of news stories, have pictures
of just girls here constantly
throughout throughout the whole podcast.
No relation to whatever I’m talking
about, just like a stimuli in the corner.
All right.
But we’re going to talk about today.
It’s Godzilla first.
We have about five stories.
Godzilla, Toho applied
for a 3D IP trademark.
So they would have the
Godzilla shape is probably
already trademarked as a
symbol or something like that.
The name Godzilla is trademarked.
They have a 3D version that
they wanted to trademark that.
The patent office said, no,
you can’t trademark that.
And their statement was it is merely a form
resembling dinosaurs or imaginary creatures
and go fuck yourself patent
office in Japan because
Godzilla is not merely
resembling a dinosaur.
Godzilla is a unique entity.
I mean, if you put a shape up and it was
a dinosaur, I would go, that’s a dinosaur.
If you put a shape
up that was Godzilla, I
could tell you not
only that it was Godzilla
that which era, which,
you know, decade it
came from because each Godzilla is
a different shape throughout the years.
The original Godzilla,
something people don’t realize.
Godzilla grew over each decade and he grew
because as the skyline of a city grew up.
So you have like Tokyo
in 1950s, 1960s, tallest
buildings, let’s say 10 stories,
15 stories, something like that.
Godzilla had to tower over that.
So the tallest building kind of
hits his chest, maybe his shoulders.
Then in the 60s and 70s,
the tallest buildings got taller.
So Godzilla in that era also got taller
because Godzilla is not a designated height.
Godzilla is taller than the
tallest tower in the city.
So that’s probably something
no one really thought about.
But if you’re a big
Godzilla fan, you know that.
You know that Godzilla’s size
isn’t determined by his actual size.
It’s determined that he is bigger
than the city he is in at all times.
So he has to tower over everything.
That’s Godzilla.
But then there’s the
years he’s grown like sort
of big spines and he
shoots lasers and stuff.
I would recognize a
Godzilla silhouette, no
problem, a 3D Godzilla shape, 100% I
would nail Godzilla 100% of the time.
Fuck you dinosaurs.
Fuck you patent office.
The Japan IP Association,
they agree with me.
They didn’t turn
out to say fuck you, a
higher court didn’t turn out
to say fuck you patent office.
Although if they had hired me for that
moment, I would have absolutely done it.
I literally would have paid them.
I would give you 10,000 yen for me to put
on a suit, come to your office, come to the
meeting where they
have the people, the
lawyers or whatever
from the patent office and
the people from the higher court and then
just go, you know, we’ve examined the case,
we’ve looked at all sides of
this and Peter and then I just
go fuck you and then they just
go back to being serious again.
I would have paid for that.
I would pay to be that guy.
Japan IP, higher court
said that the shape is
widely recognized by consumers, this
guy, and was overwhelmingly recognizable.
So the Japan IP office
granted the IP and
now the 3D shape of
Godzilla is trademarked.
So actually now I’m thinking
I can’t use it anymore.
So if it wasn’t
trademarked, I could actually
make a 3D Godzilla
shape and then use it.
I think I just fuck myself.
Oh no.
Oh no.
Since we’re talking Godzilla,
I’m not going to switch stories.
It’s a new story, but
it’s still about Godzilla.
This was on Sora News 24 the
other day and it was very interesting.
The current PM,
Shida, Shiba, I just don’t
know his name, God damn it,
let me just get his name right.
I don’t want to say the wrong
name, he was accused of falling asleep.
The current Japan PM, so we
had the guy who stepped down and
Shiba took his place and then
he called for a snap election.
It actually looked like he
wasn’t going to get reelected.
So this was a mistake.
He got reelected, just squeaks through.
It during the conversation
where they’re like
trying to decide who the new
prime minister is going to be it.
Apparently he fell asleep
or it looked like he fell asleep
and then they’re trying
to say it was cold medicine.
I think it might be
because he’s an old man.
There are old man problems that need to
be taken care of when it comes to politics.
I have generally demonstrated my bias
against old men in politics at this point.
I don’t think we need old
men in politics anymore.
I think we need to go younger.
I think when you get
to your 60s, you’re done.
You’re out of politics, you’re finished.
You can ride the wave, give speeches,
whatever, collect your money that way.
I think you’re done with politics.
Back in 2016, Ishiba saw
Shin Godzilla, and Shin
Godzilla is a very
interesting movie because
it is about 90%
administrative activities.
There is very little
Godzilla in this movie
and about halfway through I’m
like am I just watching admin?
Am I watching different
administrative bodies do
their jobs because that’s
weird and interesting
but it’s also not much of a Godzilla film
and the idea is they have to deal with the
various real life problems of a
giant monster attacking the city.
There are legal issues and Ishiba said it
doesn’t make sense that the Prime Minister
in Shin Godzilla used
the SDF to attack Godzilla
based on a military thing because
of the constitution in Japan.
He’s saying what that Prime
Minister did was technically
illegal and it’s not how
it should have been done.
In 2016, Ishiba stated
I couldn’t understand
why the SDF were
deployed against Godzilla.
Godzilla is more like a natural disaster
than an attack by a foreign power.
So the SDF can be deployed
against a foreign power.
There are three
conditions that it must
fulfill for it to be constitutionally
legal to use the SDF.
Number one, it has to be a
military attack on the country.
So Godzilla is not
a military, he’s not
attacking the country
with the behest of taking
it over, a military
attack would try to
diminish the power or undercut
the society or whatever.
That’s not really Godzilla’s intent.
So the intent of Godzilla isn’t the
same as the intent of a foreign military.
His is more like the intent of a typhoon
or tidal wave or something like that.
It’s a natural disaster, so it actually
doesn’t fulfill that first criteria.
Number two, there are no other
means to eliminate the threat.
So of course you have to do
politics first, you have to do diplomacy.
You don’t just like roll
out the tanks and start
shooting stuff, you got
to have a conversation.
Now you can’t have a
conversation with Godzilla.
So technically, you
cannot do diplomacy, but
you can’t stop with Godzilla and say like
maybe we should have a conversation about
this, maybe there’s
something else we can do,
maybe we can offer you some
money, maybe we could, you know.
Godzilla often has
attracted to the big cities
because of the energy,
the old movies would have it.
He was actually attracted to
electricity and it sort of charged him up.
So he was coming in and smashing stuff and
basically absorbing all the electricity.
So maybe we could set
up like a hydroelectric
dam near the edge of
this, the country and
you can just like go charge off that
and we could do that for you, Mr. Godzilla.
He’s not going to have that conversation.
So number two actually means
you could roll out the SDF.
Number three, the use
of force must be minimal.
That’s interesting.
Everything out the tanks
and stuff and shooting.
So, so what is a minimal
resistance to Godzilla
is a very difficult thing
because everything
they throw out, every
movie has them throwing
like tanks shooting at
it constantly, missiles
hitting it, airplanes,
helicopters coming
shooting up, does all that stuff
and Godzilla just kind of walks away.
So they have to always come up
with some sort of other thing to do.
So it’s really number
one that holds the
SDF back from attacking
Godzilla that way or
defending against Godzilla
because it is defending against it.
They’re not really attacking it.
They don’t go after them.
There are other movies later on where
they do, but that’s a separate issue.
We’re not going into that.
Some of the American
ones, the Godzilla
versus King Kong, they
go down after them and
I think, you know, that actually
says something about America.
So the question Ishiba
was actually proposing
was how do you stop Godzilla legally and
maintain the integrity of the constitution?
It’s a very interesting question.
This is the kind of thing I really enjoy
getting into because you have this fanciful
situation, but the
reality of it, which is a
lot of what Shin
Godzilla dealt with, which
is why I was so
confused, like, why are we
going from administrative body to
administrative body and seeing what they do?
And I realized, like,
oh, they’re trying to
show what the reality
of dealing with a Godzilla
like in modern society
would actually be
like, it’s actually a
very interesting movie.
I don’t think they should
call it a monster movie.
I think they should have
called it something else.
So Shin Godzilla, Shin means new.
New Godzilla.
It should have been like the government
versus Godzilla or something like that.
I don’t, I should have come up with
something more pithy before I started this.
I wasn’t going to be
able to do it in a minute.
The police and the SDF can be used to
react to a threat with proportional power.
So constitutionally, it doesn’t actually
matter that it’s a military attack because
Godzilla is so large
and so powerful and they
are allowed to respond with a
proportionate amount of power.
They are therefore
allowed to respond to
Godzilla with the tanks and the airplanes
and the stuff and shoot missiles at it.
But it would have
to be approved by the
cabinet or the government
or something first.
The prime minister is in a unique situation
where he has to make that judgment call and
call out the SDF, call
out the military, call
out the police or call
out whatever he calls out.
He’s going to be responsible
for the results in the aftermath.
So let’s say once they
take care of Godzilla,
then they start
looking at the legality
of this situation and
realize it was illegal,
then the prime minister
has to step down.
That’s actually in Shin
Godzilla, one of the
issues is the prime
minister isn’t 100% sure
he should take responsibility
for what they’re about to do.
And he actually, I don’t
know, I saw a couple
of years ago, I think
he actually steps down
to someone else takes
over and they do it.
And they’re like, well, if I take control
for a day and get fired, it doesn’t really
make a big difference.
Someone wins and got
like a, they don’t have
freedom of information
act like they do in America,
but someone went and got the
actual documents pertaining to this.
And legal documents actually agree.
The use of tools to
stop it is acceptable,
tools being whatever
you need to stop it, which
means tanks, missiles,
airplanes, helicopters,
all that other stuff, then becomes
the tools so you have to redefine them.
That’s actually what’s happening.
You’re not using
weapons, you’re using those
weapons as tools to deter Godzilla to
push Godzilla back to try to stop Godzilla.
So if you ever wonder
about the legality of
what’s happening in a
Godzilla movie, you can
now know the constitutional
rights Godzilla has
as an entity entering
the country, not being
a member of another nation
means it is not a military attack.
There’s no passports involved.
There’s nothing like that.
This is a natural disaster and it is
being dealt with as a natural disaster.
And the reaction of
the military and whatnot
is should be proportional
to what the threat
Godzilla proposes, offers,
propose a fuck I don’t know.
It should be proportional to
the threat that Godzilla poses.
Got it in the end.
Japan has a group called
the Japan week men.
The name itself is already self deprecating
and I don’t know how serious it is.
I have heard about their
activities in the past.
They have a couple of joke
groups that do kind of serious things.
They have like anti
basically Valentine’s
Day saying like it’s
rude to singles and all
us lonely men who don’t have girlfriends
who shouldn’t have Valentine’s Day.
So they wanted to ban Valentine’s Day.
The week men association
is a little different.
They’re trying to bring
awareness to men’s
issues, but but I think
the thing is calling
yourself the week men
association already undercuts
your message because
it’s already feels like a joke.
It doesn’t feel very serious, even
though they might talk about serious stuff.
They wanted to raise awareness of the
men’s issue that men can be victims too.
So they have women only cars in Japan.
No one disagrees with
women only cars except
of very small group of assholes who want
to get into those cars and abuse women.
So they have a lot of sexual
assault, sexual abuse happens on train.
So you get very crowded
trains and then people
touch other people and then they run off
the train before you can catch them to give
a safe space for women, they
created women’s only cars.
Everyone basically
seems to be okay with it.
I’ve had a couple of people like trying to
make arguments but in my mind I’m like the
only reason you’re
making an argument against
a women’s only car is
because you’re gross
or awful or hate women
or something like that.
So you’re kind of
outing yourself by do this.
The week men’s association
isn’t against women’s cars.
In fact, they’re saying that women’s cars
should be available as often as needed.
So these are not like anti women men.
And again, the message becomes
confused because the name is a joke.
But what they wanted
to do is say, but men can
get touched or abused
or sexually assaulted
on the train just like
women and they’re not
saying we should have
men only cars because
that leads to another
weird problem because men
I have to assume are
99% of the perpetrators
of this kind of the Chicon behavior
where they touch you on the train.
So if you’re putting just men with other
men and those are the where the Chicon are
and they want to touch other men,
you actually have them solve the problem.
The problem is of course
trying to catch them
or educate them or do
something to actually stop them.
I was shocked when I learned that trains
in Japan didn’t have cameras in them.
I just thought every
train for years and years
and years would have had cameras
and tons of the most of them don’t.
Cameras are being introduced to trains now.
It seems very late in the game to me.
But raising awareness is fair, like men
can be victims of sexual assault as well.
So they wanted to
make a men’s only train
car event and then have it
go from one place to another.
The problem is the
name and the association.
So as soon as you say men’s only car with
the weak men’s association, all the train
companies like yeah I don’t
know if I want to do that.
And so they ended up
coming to a deal with a
train company in Osaka
and the train company
said look you can’t
say the train line name.
You can’t mention our names like
JR East or whatever it would be.
You can’t use us in
your advertising material
and you can’t tell them
where it’s going to be.
It would already make it very difficult.
They’re like we agreed
to all of that because
we’ll tell people where to
meet it will be in the train area.
Then we’ll all get on the train go.
And this was not a men’s only
event even though they’re calling
the men’s only train because
they’re trying to raise awareness.
Anyone who supported
the idea of awareness
of men’s issues was
welcome on the train car.
So the men’s only train
car wasn’t men’s only
women could get on
as well as long as they
supported the message
that they were talking about.
Something that actually again you wouldn’t
be able to check until it was too late.
You get some like women who maybe
don’t fully support this as an issue.
They get on and start
making a protest or something.
Now you’ve got a whole other set of issues.
Well it was planned
for November 19th for
International Men’s Day didn’t actually
know that was the thing if I’m being honest.
It was suddenly canceled on
November 5th no reason given.
The rail operator was already cautious and
they said we can’t have no men only signs
like just like a
sign on the train or
something that says
men only you can’t do that.
So the no reason given
is actually the issue.
So they had this idea.
They wanted to raise awareness.
They’ve canceled it and
they gave no reason for it.
And that actually
again the weak men’s
association of like of
course they didn’t give
a reason because they just
gave up because they’re weak men.
I was going to do a quiz Tom
friend of mine and a fan sent in.
I think he actually
wrote the quiz and then
I meet it was like I’m
throw that out because
I’m an asshole no but because I looked he
actually started writing about the thing he
was interested in which was
the bit that caught my attention.
So I’m going to drop a picture
and discord for you to see.
This is there was a
Vietnamese bar that was illegal.
So I don’t know if they were doing anything
sexual but when they say illegal foreigner
bar because it’s
usually Filipina bars and
stuff and it’s usually
like there’s a vaguely
sexual feeling going on but this
might have just been an unlicensed bar.
And so in the picture
you will see the police
grabbed some items
to show like is like when
you make your 500
kilo cocaine bust you like
show off and they do
this they do this in Japan
as well but to a
lesser degree and you’ll
notice some of the items
that they’ve collected.
Some bottles of wine
and champagne and stuff
but if you some some
darts which I guess
could technically be illegal it
looks like a menu and an iPad.
And then there is a connect for some playing
cards okay but I wanted to focus on the
connect for okay
because let’s say you and I
are policemen we are
now we have just completed
our bust of the Vietnamese
bar and we’re going
to be like we’re building our display and
we have a connect for do we play a game do
we set it up or do we
take it the way it was
left and just put it up like so you and I
are like okay we’re setting we’re actually
we might even not
even be the cops I don’t
know if it’s like a
separate job to set up the
diorama that is the
the like display of our
arrest yeah I’m standing
there with a connect for
do you think it was
completed in advance do you
think it was something
the cops put together
what would you do so
you have a connect for that
you’re going to stick
on your diorama to show
that you’ve just completed
a criminal investigation
what is your instinct
my instinct is to make
it look like a game was played okay so you
and I understand the rules of connect for
the person who put this
together you will notice
so could you explain
the win state of connect
for just make a line of
thought make a line of
thought horizontally
or vertically so what did
they do in the picture
this is going to be up
on the screen so people
can see it but they just
they threw tiles in like
alternating columns yeah so
they did same colors a
column a four yellow three red
then a weird one where
it’s like two yellow and one
and then it’s four and
four red and one and then
three and three and three
yeah there are two win
states that I can see
yeah I don’t I don’t know
what they were thinking
so so to me yeah so my
image is that what
they did is they took the
connect for it and they
threw it down and they
just put it in as really
quickly to show that it
was a connect for board
I don’t know what the
board is normally laid
out what could it be if
the tiles weren’t there
yeah well no no people
think it is I would like
I don’t think to me I
don’t know of younger
people than us played
connect for in a real
way like I really don’t
I don’t know how popular
connect for was but I
were I played connect
for I’ve played video game
versions of connect for
you and I played connect
for in it takes two yeah
oh no no the other one
a way out wait oh did
we yeah in the hospital we
played connect for and I
got really angry because
I lost and I thought I
was gonna win I am a
gracious loser though
at least I can say that
after the fact well I
can make you know I can
say some stuff but you
know I’m passionate about
connect for it has my
youngest has a connect for
in like a game collection
thing on the tablet
yeah okay so it makes
sense to me that that
most kids would most
people would know a connect
for so if you had an
empty slate thing with
the holes in it I think
I would still recognize
as that as connect for
but I think putting the
tiles in makes it more
visually appealing it’s
clearer what it is but
then I would immediately be
like why can’t just make
rows I have to make it look
like a game I don’t know
why it’s like an authenticity
thing I want people
to know that this was a
real game so I’d have
only one win state that the
fact that there’s two
win states and it’s really
really set me off after a
while the more I thought
about it the more wrong
it seemed and it’s not
even like oh you know
they just put the extra tile
into complete after
this is very obviously not
a game was one yeah but
he won with a straight line
you because if you go
from right to left from the
visual side it’s three
three three yeah so at any
point one of those could
have won yeah and then it’s
almost like I got a box
around the two little
on the left side and
then they just they’re just
throwing like four like
there’s no way to build
that box and not let the
other person win yeah it
it’s oh my god everything
about the game it’s
just baffling see the more
you look at it the more
annoying it gets and
that actually I have less
faith in the police now
because because they didn’t
I’m not saying they
should have stopped and
played a game of connect
four but they should have
made the connect four
that they’re going to put
on display look realistic
and that that lack of
attention to detail
makes me think you’re a
lesser cop than if you
had done that piece of work
or even if it just been
through the tiles in randomly
randomly I would have
been okay with that too
but there’s even tiles left
in the tray at the bottom
yeah so like it’s not
even a finished game even
though they’ve finished
it apparently twice yeah
the only other explanation
I could come up with
is that they played a
different game with the
connect four board thing
so like a drinking game or
something yeah like put
this tile in and ask this
could like almost like a
truth or dare or something
connect four is like
the whole heart of this
case it is because in
the picture they have the
the nice sort of
Vietnamese dresses and they
have the bottles I mean
everything else is fine
I had no problem with it
and then Tom sent this
picture to me and he
goes and then look at the
connect four and that was
it it was that was my week
I kind of have an issue
with the playing cards too
because it doesn’t look
like a full deck it does not
look like a full deck it
looks like they’re missing
cards and they’ve found
them out kind of around
so this is one of the
things I love the most
about these pictures
is someone put a lot of
thought into it but also
didn’t put enough thought
into it because the wine
bottles are fanned out in
an arc and then the
playing cards are fanned out
under that yeah and then
there’s the connect foreign
stuff in the middle
obviously like the center
pieces the connect for
and then the super expensive
bottle behind it clearly
because it has its own
box that’s in books but
what is the thing in front
of the playing cards
and the connect force it
just a flannel oh those
are oh she bought it
those are the wet towels
yeah why would that be
included so this is all
supposed to be evidence
of some sort of you
know guess technically
how serious the crime is like
like what a what a good job we did
I look at all this at
point shit we collected
yeah the wet towels
that are in every single
restaurant in every
single place in Japan don’t
need to be included
in this so I never really
followed through on my
feature of the guy who
sets things out but it
you because it used to be
underwear and they would
there was some you could
tell what kind of
attention they put because
there was one guy and
he put so much work into
it because it was color
coded it was the what
it started at the top left
corner where like white
panties and then it went
down and it got dark in
the bottom right and the
opposite corner wow he
did like he did like a
shade transition throughout
and I was like this
dude had a lot of time
because it was like 500
pairs of underwear that
were stolen or something
and I’ve seen like someone
was stealing shoes and
the guy put the shoes
in like order like this
corner was sort of sports
shoes and the other
corner was like sort of
more work shoes and
stuff oh my god I know the
guy who does it is just
OCD it’s it’s the extreme
but then we get this guy
with the connect 4 yeah
he was on holiday the
OCD guy was on holiday
and so this guy’s like
well I’ll just fan everything
out and I got a whole
bunch of garbage here
that they left in the room and oh there’s a
connect 4 and I’ll just throw the tiles in
maybe that’s what it was
they just had some wine
and shit and they’re like
it’s not really cutting it
what else is it like yeah what else is in
the room we need cops need to do better
police committing crimes
a cop forged power of
attorney and stole 7
million yen from a resident
he’s 70 year old man
so basically this guy had
been a police officer
for a year and realized
like crime pays more
than being a cop and so
at the beginning of this
show I started talking
about how I have
more integrity almost
unintentionally I just
when I talk about stuff being
factual I want it to be accurate so I don’t
do single news sources I always want to get
two or three news sources
before I actually do a
story which I think is
more research than other
places do even though
well because again it’s
the spread of internet
information a story gets
out and then other
people pick it up and just
repeat it and then
sometimes iterate on it I’ve
actually seen that I’ve
seen stories where something
went from story to
bigger to bigger to bigger
something like that
multiple times which actually
Ninja News Japan then
becomes a very interesting
source of news because
I’ll tell you all three
stories because I don’t
actually know which one’s
true I assume the first
one which is usually less
dramatic one and then
the more dramatic versions
get on because one
of the stories I did it
was a taxi driver hitting
a pigeon on purpose
and then by the third
iteration of that story it
was hit a dove and so
they changed the bird to
make it more sympathetic
towards the bird and make
the taxi driver look
even worse yeah integrity
some cops don’t have
integrity the ones who
have been there for a
year and realized I’m not
making that much money
and I can make a lot more
money committing
crimes and now I’ve learned
some interesting way to
commit crimes here’s a very
interesting way to commit
a crime he deals with a
resident who’s 70 years
old he gets his banking
information he brought
the victims bank book
and seal to the post office
they don’t do signatures
in Japan they do seals
so a stamp so that’s
actually one of the
questions of which is better
a seal or a stamp
because if I could maybe
forge your signature if
I could learn how to do
it but I also could
learn how to I could just
steal your stamp and
it’s much easier to use
so you can see sort
of one of the issues of
stamp versus signature
my signature has changed
over time which is one
of the problems so it’s
gotten messier or less
legible so if you compare
my signature now to my
signature 10 15 20 years
ago it’s probably very
different and so a bank
could actually say it’s
not the same signature
a stamp remains the
same but then I could go
into someone else’s
house steal their stamp and
then try to use their
stamp just like this cop
did he brought the victims
bank book and stamp to
this post office he was
wearing his uniform and
then immediately flashed
his badge so of course
everyone in the post
offices like oh he’s a police
officer he is therefore
trustworthy the staff
believed him because
he’s a cop and he then took
out seven million yen from
the man’s bank account
and tried to give himself
power of attorney he
was actually caught
very quickly when a family
member noticed seven
million yen missing from the
man’s bank account so
it’s actually good he had
family members checking on his bank account
so he’s been arrested of course the police
apologize they say we’re
gonna train people to make
sure this doesn’t happen
again the problem with
training police is your
training them and how crimes
are done and then they
might go huh that’s a neat idea
this is the six prefectual
police to be arrested
this year so in that
prefecture six cops have
been arrested so I
actually didn’t look up the
stats we’re getting close
to the end of the year so
we’re gonna get to stat
season which for me is a
very exciting season for
other people not so much
because they don’t some
people love the numbers
heavy episodes that I
do at the end of the year
some people don’t I love
the numbers how many
cops get arrested is
very interesting because in
relation to how many
cops there are more than
anything else because we
talk about bad apples but
how many bad apples are
there is a very interesting
question I think I should
make a segment called
politician saying dumb
stuff because we do
get a lot of politicians
and again the older
japanese men they’ve
gotten used to saying
whatever they want to
say and it causing problems
for them and them not
really knowing how to
handle it so this politician
he was on his youtube
stream so he has a
weekly show he does on
youtube he streams it I
don’t know how much is
how big his audience
is not very interested to
see if he has a bigger
audience than me so if I
can say my audience is
at the low end 600 to 800
people high end a
thousand people so let’s just
do the the middle let’s
say 750 people listen to
this podcast every week
do I get more listeners
than this japanese
politician is very because
this is a small amateur
thing so 700’s a massive
number I’m really happy
with that I would love it
for it to grow but I’m never
going to complain about
a fairly large group
of people listening to
the nonsense that I
spout every week to week
competing against
japanese politicians would be
pretty funny this is the
leader of the conservative
party now that makes
it sound big it’s not the
conservative party in
japan is an incredibly small
party because there are
thousands of parties and
a lot of them are very
small now this party got
2% of the most recent
vote so they basically
got like a seat or maybe
two seats in the house
so they don’t have any
real political power so
that’s an important thing
to keep in mind because
when we talk about
conservative party if you talk
about american politics
or British politics or
Canadian politics those
are basically one of the
two parties this is not
that this is an incredibly
small party the communist
party in japan is a much
bigger more powerful
party than this conservative
party the conservative
party of japan was streaming
on youtube talking about
the declining birth rate
this is a very big issue
in japan I have solved it
multiple times if they
would just start listening
in japan they would
have the answer they’re
looking for but they
don’t that’s all I can say
he’s talking he’s on
youtube he can say whatever
he wants so he does I
do like there’s a caveat
at the beginning before he starts speaking
what he says is there’s a hypothetical idea
which I do not support
now here’s an interesting
thing if you don’t support
it maybe don’t say it
don’t talk about the
things you don’t support
talk about the things
you actually do support
since you’re supposed
to be the leader of a
party want to talk about
what your party would do
to solve this very real
problem for the country
don’t talk about something
that’s hypothetical
and not real and it’s
going to piss people off
or you can do it this
guy does and start talking
so he’s tried to cover
himself by saying he doesn’t
support this he doesn’t
believe this this is
not something we would
actually do but here’s
a hypothetical this is
literally like me going
I’m not racist but and
then say a whole bunch of
racist stuff he’s going
I don’t support this but
here’s a really neat
idea I heard recently so
he said there’s a
hypothetical idea which I do
not support in removing
women’s uterus is when
they turn 30 now I
don’t support that either
because it’s a really
dumb fucking idea and it
doesn’t solve the declining
birth rate issue because
women over 30 are still
very capable of having
babies uh the technologies
improved health is
improved there’s a whole
bunch of things have been
improved so you don’t
need to have a baby when
you’re 20 years old anymore
you don’t have to risk
death by having a baby
when you’re 28 29 30 35
whatever um so that
whole thing that came out of
his mouth in that moment
should have been like
everyone be like oh
yes now there were other
people in the stream and
after you got to his third
or fourth point were
like maybe this is too
much still didn’t stop he
said woman women would
not go to university and
cannot marry after 25
so he’s saying that
women basically can’t go to
university so they have
no work prospects therefore
marriage would be the
more attractive prospect
therefore we could make
a law to make it so they
can’t marry after 25
years old so if you don’t
get married before 25
and start having babies
you don’t get to do
that forever but then also
you don’t have a
university education so you
can’t get a really good
job so your whole life
sucks if you don’t get
married and have babies
before you’re 25
and again that is a lot
because that has no
relationship to reality how’s
it works now we we need
dual incomes to survive
like this is normal people
now if you have kids
you need dual incomes
my kids are now getting to
high school and university
age we are sitting
down working out our
finances to make sure that
our kids will be able
to go to university it is a
huge burden on us as
parents but we want our kids
to have the education
so they can get the job so
they can do what they
want and education takes a
long time if they want
to do further education
they want to do that
they’re going to go into legs
let’s say a master’s or a
PhD that’s going to be 8
10 years of education I
assume I will be supporting
them at least partially
through all that my wife
not having a job we
wouldn’t be able to do that so
our now family our
future has a lower standard
overall because of this
guy’s weird weird idea
from some science fiction
thing you read so after
you said women’s uterus is should be removed
when they turn 30 women shouldn’t go to
university and they should
not be allowed to marry
after 25 all to incentivize
them having babies
at an early age so maybe
I assume then have more
babies even though
again a family wouldn’t be
able to survive on a
single income at that point
people got upset so
the other people who are
with them are like isn’t
that too much and he’s
like I don’t know I think
I sound pretty smart
he then the next day
said I will retract the
statements and apologize
as people found them
unpleasant and I think
the thing is he’s unpleasant
because he thought this
was a good idea in the first
place is not the statements
it’s him saying those
unpleasant things
thinking it was a good idea
that’s the problem I don’t
know how many times I’ve
done this on this show
we’re at like episode 333
or something like that
I actually should check
but we’re in the there are three thirties
at this point how many times have I said
retracting a statement
is not a thing you can’t
say something into the
world and then retract
the statement statements
can be taken out of
context but this is
another place where an
engine is Japan tries to
show a certain amount of
integrity by looking at
what is said before and
after so I have full
context of what was actually
said so I know yeah that
person was actually joking
all the people who say
Donald Trump is joking
when he makes like
incendiary statements
he’s not you can look at
what he says before and
when he says after and
realize that’s not a joke
because it’s not funny
this guy saying uh I want
to retract my statement
it doesn’t retract the
statement it doesn’t go
away you still set it you’re
still a gross human being
you shouldn’t say those
things retracting it
and apologizing because
people found it unpleasant
you should have known
that going in he then
went further to go to say
I was explaining the
time limitation on giving
birth in a plain way
which is not what he was
doing because it’s a
function of biology and has
nothing to do with his
very arbitrary time limit
of 25 to 30 if you don’t
support something don’t
support it by not talking about it
gotta stop and watch Dave settle in
three turns four turns
five turns and down okay
good five turns is good good
amount of turns before you settle it.
[SIGHS]
[BLANK_AUDIO]
