Nickname Problems

(upbeat music)

Johnny Smiley is right at the top.

I didn’t wanna talk about
him when he was trending

for being an asshole and
I don’t really wanna talk

about him now, but
he’s fallen into the trap

with the Japanese police that
the sort of draconian nature

of Japanese laws most
of the time I find terrifying,

but the benefit of the
draconian system is when

it is applied the right
way is quite entertaining.

So Japan has a system they can hold
you for 23 days without charging you.

They can do that for each crime.

So what they do often is they catch
you, hold you for 23 days, they let you go.

As you walk out the
door, they catch you again

and hold you for another
23 days on another charge.

Johnny Smiley, he was
arrested for trespassing.

He was held for 23 days
and just recently was released

and as he was released,
they re-arrested him

for obstruction of business,
which is a classic obstruction

of business for recording video inside
a restaurant and playing loud music.

So in Japan, in America, if you’re in
public, you’re allowed to record people.

In Japan, that’s not the case.

You actually need to get every single
person’s permission to record them.

If it’s in a business, it’s
doubly worse because you need

the business’s permission
and the people in the place.

So it becomes a very difficult thing

to actually get permission
to video in any space,

really, if you’re gonna do it and put it on
the Internet and stuff, you can get sued.

That’s basically what it comes down to.

The playing loud music is
an obstruction of business.

I’m sure the business told him to stop
and he didn’t because he’s Johnny Smiley.

So they arrested him for that.

He was re-arrested and then pulled back
in, he’s gonna be held for another 23 days.

His visa is probably very close
to expired if it hasn’t already.

And it’s just a question
now of once they deport

him, ’cause that’s really
all they’re gonna do.

They’re not really gonna
charge him with any of this stuff.

They’re gonna hold
him until his visa expires.

Probably put him on a blacklist
so he can’t come back to Japan.

But I’m wondering if they’re just
like, I do wonder about his mindset.

Like, have they made this
experience so negative to him?

That he won’t come back.

Like, he won’t be able to come back.

But if he could, would he come back?

Is it really interesting question to me?

I’d be interested in sort
of one or two interviews,

maybe after he gets back
home to wherever he’s from.

Or not, ’cause he just seems like a prick.

And that is sort of the core
issue, is that he’s just a prick.

And I’m happy he’s been arrested
and I’m happy he’s being held.

I’m happy he’s going
through all the nightmares

that the Japanese legal
system can create for someone.

It’s just usually when it does it,
it’s not really fair to the person.

But in this case, he did it to himself.

(upbeat music)

So the conveyor belt Sushi terrorism.

There was a couple of instances
of this, but one was a guy.

It turned out later that he was arrested

on a separate charge for
underage sex trafficking.

So he’s pretty gross.

But the real question was, how
much trouble are you going to get into

for taking the publicly shared
soy sauce and linking it?

‘Cause that’s what he was arrested for.

That’s a public nuisance
obstruction of business.

The issue being, how much of
a threat is it to other people?

How much of a health
hazard is it to other people?

And what is the punishment
that should go along with that?

That was the bid I was interested in.

Well, he has been sentenced and
he’s going to do three years in prison.

He’s, so basically, being a jerk
in a high-ten Sushi restaurant

has led him to now spend the
next three years of his life in prison.

That’s separate from the
other charge, the other like

sex charge, the other charge
that he had given to him

that everyone only found
out about after the fact.

Before warned, if you’re
a Johnny Somali type,

and you come to Japan,
actually the thing is, yeah.

So this shows the difference.

They can get rid of Johnny Somali
without actually doing anything.

They just hold him till his visa expires,

get him out of the country,
and then he’s blacklisted.

This guy, because he’s Japanese,
they can’t just get rid of him.

So three years in prison.

Now that seems extreme,
but also they’re absolutely

making sure he’s
never gonna do it again.

(upbeat music)

Japan versus hay fever.

This is something I go through every year.

I am a big hay fever
sufferer now, which sucks.

Areas around major cities, they’re
going to start culling the trees.

Right now they are currently cutting
down about 50,000 hectares a year.

They’re going to increase
that to 70,000 hectares.

They have submitted a new budget.

The new budget includes more tree murder
machines to murder trees more efficiently.

And then a guaranteed supply of
allergy drugs for up to 500,000 people.

That’s double what it was previously.

40% of the population of Japan
suffers from allergy seasonal allergies.

And it’s, they’re actually seeing it now
as a point because it’s so many people.

It is problematic
because it actually will

affect productivity
overall on a national level.

So we’re gonna get rid of these trees.

They’re gonna plant low
pollen trees in place of them.

I’m hoping I’m interested now in this.

Actually, I thought about
this in the last second.

If the trees are non-native
species, will people

form allergies to them in
like the next generation?

A lot of allergy sufferers, they
develop the allergy over time.

So that’s a big question.

Will they just start
having allergies right away?

If you plant some new
trees, will there be less

allergies overall and
that will be generational?

Or will future generations develop more
and severe allergies to these new trees?

This is reminding me of a story I read.

I think it was a couple of years ago.

It was a guy he was doing research on
those monkeys that sit in hot Springs.

Those seem like a nice thing, but
that’s just poop soup at that point.

And he noticed that one of
the monkeys had a triallurgy

and he said he felt really sorry for it
’cause it’s not like he could go over it.

You’re not supposed to,
as a nature documentarian,

you’re not supposed to interfere
with nature, but at the same time.

And you can’t really give a
monkey drugs, but he was like, man,

I really wanted to give that
monkey an antihistamine.

And I’m totally on board.

I was like, that monkey’s life sucks.

And there’s anything you could have done.

I would have felt the exact same way.

It’s irrelevant, but there’s empathy for
you in the world, which is a nice thing.

(upbeat music)

For the first time in a
decade, a survey was done.

No, but the first time in the
decade a survey was done.

No, a survey was done.

As it is done every year.

And the first time in a
decade, Japanese people are

generally trending towards
more positive than negative

in their impression of
South Korea, which is great.

‘Cause I want South Korea and
Japan to become fast friends.

I understand that the complicated
history between the two countries,

I understand all the terrible
things that have happened

in the past, but I’m
thinking about the future.

And the future is these
two powerhouses working

together become a
dominant force in the world.

37.4% of people think South Korea is good.

32.8% I think South Korea is bad.

And I’m guessing the other
leftover percentages are neutral,

but that trend to the positive is
something I wanna see more in the world.

Not just in South Korea, but I just
want people to be nice and friendly.

I’m not in a jovial mood.

I messed up my knee and I went to the doctor
and they’re like, well, let’s just wait.

And honestly, the last thing you
want from the doctor is just wait.

You actually just wanted
to do something and fix it.

You want it fixed so you can go
back and be a normal human being.

So I may be a little more low key today.

I hope I am still providing you the
standard of entertainment you expect,

which I’m assuming at
this point is quite low

if you’ve come back to Ninja
Ninja Japan for any amount of time.

So, you know, we’re in good shape.

Let’s just keep it there and move on.

(upbeat music)

So the Prime Minister of Japan,
Kishida was giving a speech.

And he has been now
referred to in the media

as tax increase mega
nay, mega nay is classes.

So they are calling him
essentially tax increase classes.

Or I guess if you’re gonna turn it into
slang, it would be tax increase four eyes.

This heckler was at his speech.

So he’s been called down the media

and apparently this
nickname really, really bugs

him, which honestly
is already pretty funny.

A heckler while he was giving his
speech, shouted out tax increase mega nay.

And so the Prime Minister’s like
clearly he’s been resting on his mind.

So he had like a wicked comeback.

He goes, should I get LASIC?

Which I think is not addressing the
insulting part of the moniker as it were.

It’s the tax increase part.

People are upset about not your glasses.

Did not land as strongly
as maybe he had hoped.

This is one of the
problems with politicians.

They don’t tend to be like funny.

This is one of the
reasons people liked Trump

as he said dumb shit, but he
wasn’t funny in a smart way.

He was funny in a double way.

And then he always, he crossed lines,
which is where the entertainment ended.

Prime Minister’s heads of state, whatnot.

They should try to stay
out of the comedy realm,

unless that’s where they
started and how they got into it.

The irony now, because of his
statement, should I get LASIC?

A bunch of people on the Internet
were like, yes, yes, you should.

And they’re saying like you are more
handsome without glasses than with glasses.

So you should get the
LASIC that you were jokingly

suggesting as a counter
to this nickname you

have, I don’t think he’s
done himself any favors.

I don’t know.

I don’t know what to
do with that one at all.

Tax increase for eyes is
a pretty harmless name.

I don’t think that would get to me.

I guess I’m not the
prime minister of a country

where tax increases have become
like my reputational standard.

I’m trying to think of what
people, I got, because my hair is red.

It was redder when I was young.

I got carrot top, my name’s Peter.

So I got Peter Cottontail
and Peter Pumpkin Eater.

And at no point did any of
those actually bother me?

Like I remember being a kid and a kid
walking on to a guru, Peter, Peter, Peter,

Pumpkin Eater, I was like, and,
like, is that really the best you got?

There’s no personal insult there.

You’ve just taken a child’s nursery rhyme
that has my name in it and then said that.

That’s not very good.

That kid actually,
I think it kind of

humiliated him because
my reaction was so blase.

I did get called Peter
Cottontail a few times

and I was like, again, and
a very lovable character.

Everyone, everyone thinks
Peter Cottontail is cute.

So, I mean, you’re not really
hurting my feelings at that point.

I have nowhere to go with this.

It’s just, nicknames only have
power if you give them power.

So I was thinking, maybe
it would have been in

’cause she does best
interest to ignore the nickname

and the heck, throw the
heckler out for being disruptive.

But the response, should I get LASIC?

Probably he thought was
like a drop the mic, slam dunk

and it really came out fairly
lame and, I mean, let’s be honest,

it was, and now people are
saying, yes, you should get LASIC.

You would look better with LASIC.

(electronic music)

A 75-year-old man.

All right, this isn’t creepy
news, this is just violent.

A 75-year-old man
was arrested for pulling

a woman’s hair at an
ATM for being too slow.

That’s it.

It seems like a very weird reaction and
then again, thinking that it’s acceptable.

Like, so honestly, I’ve
been at ATMs in Japan

and people do seem
to write their life story

into the touch pad
when they’re doing stuff.

But they’re doing their finances.

Their personal finances, it takes time.

Is frustrating it is for me?

I sit there and wait, that’s
what I do, it’s what you should do.

I’ve never instinctively thought
maybe I should assault them

in some way and it will
make them wrap up quicker.

It will make them wrap up
quicker or not ’cause if they

have to get stuff out, still
has to wait, I don’t know.

He claims he did nothing
wrong, not understanding

that you aren’t allowed
to go around grabbing

people’s hair and pulling
on it all Willy nilly alike.

So at 75, he’s clearly not gonna be
changing his way of thinking, at 75.

It’ll be interesting to see if
he gets like assault charges.

It is assault.

Is he gonna get jail time?

I doubt it, he’ll probably get a fine.

I bet he has to pay the girls some
money, which is, I think appropriate.

Putting your hands on someone’s
not okay, I need a lawyer friend.

I think that’s maybe it.

I need a Japanese scholar
expert lawyer type person

and I can give them these scenarios
and we can kind of talk through

what the actual appropriate
punishment would be.

‘Cause I would like to hear that.

I would like to know what the actual
punishment should be for these things.

And then maybe compare them
to what it actually comes out as

and then, you know, talk
through the difference.

So if you’re a Japanese
lawyer who speaks English,

that’s a pretty tall order
for an engineer’s Japan.

Although, once again, rated the
number two podcast on Japanese news.

Again, right behind the national newspaper.

So I realized though, I saw,
of course, being number two

it kind of bugs you if you’re
number two a couple of times.

So I went and checked
and they release an

episode every day and I
think that’s the problem.

Because if they release an episode
every day and it gets downloaded every day,

their numbers are always
going to be higher than mine.

So I’m never going to be able to catch
up because I can’t do it every single day.

But think, I became the number two podcast

for Japanese news with
very little investment.

Wow, shit.

Now I just thought of how much money
you’ve spent on fucking podcasting stuff.

The mic, arm, the microphone, the camera.

I should not have gone down this path.

The mayor of Nakama was a guest speaker

and he decided to try to be
charming and smart and witty,

which is what you should do
when you’re giving speeches.

There’s a very fine line and you
have to know your audience and stuff.

And so that’s where
this all sort of falls apart.

He decided to say speeches
and skirts should be short.

Now while I agree with
his sentiment, I do think

speeches should be short
and I am a heterosexual male.

So I do enjoy a short skirt.

I know that as a public official
that is not an appropriate statement

to make during any sort
of speech, as a guest

speaker, you’re actually
making the speaker look bad.

So that’s also problematic.

But he got in trouble, he apologized.

I think as far as some
of the grow statements

that have been made, like all the races and
stuff, that one is sort of more innocent.

So I think he thought this
was like a good joke term thing.

And he sort of spoke out a term
as come back to bite him in his butt.

And I was about to make some
jokes and I’ve decided not to,

which is exactly what the
mayor of Nacama didn’t do.

(upbeat music)

The creator of Gantz is
a manga and it turned into

an anime and then they
made a live action film.

Hiroya Oku.

Claims to be the first person
to have drawn giant breasts.

Now I personally believe
that giant breasts have been

drawn well, well before
he started making comics.

Now I think what he
means is like an official

capacity of some sort that
he has made giant breasts

a common thing and
that he’s the inspiration

for other manga artists
to draw giant breasts.

So he feels that he has
inspired other manga artists

to draw their female
characters with giant breasts

instead of just like normal
anatomically appropriate breasts.

I guess he feels like he’s
left his Mark on the world.

I’m wondering if that’s the
legacy I would have chosen

for myself, if I was gonna
choose my own legacy,

I don’t know if that’s the
one I would have gone for.

Having to tell everyone about it means

that not everyone knows
it or feels the same way.

So there’s an interesting secondary
question there of do they disagree.

I do know that giant breasts
were drawn before him,

but at the same time
perhaps not an official capacity,

he claimed that other manga artists sort of
copied him and that he made this a trend.

That of course the anime
otaku audience cares for deeply.

Okay, a guy was arrested for spilling
bodily fluids on a skirt on a train.

And he said in his defense,
so he’s on a train, it’s crowded,

and then this woman goes, hey, young lady,
there’s stuff on your skirt, she checks,

and there’s like that
stuff, it’s man stuff,

it’s stuff, we kinda
all know what it is.

The man was somehow
found out fairly quickly and

arrested, and he said
he didn’t do it on purpose.

He said, I believe the
bodily fluids may have spilled

because I couldn’t get tissues
or a handkerchief out in time,

but I wasn’t thinking about
splashing the girl with it.

Please keep in mind in his defense
that he was still on a public train,

he was still taking care
of personal business

and the fact that he couldn’t get to his
tissues in time isn’t the issue at hand.

I have long said that Japanese trains,

because of all this stuff,
should have cameras,

there’s actually no cameras
on Japanese public transport.

This is gonna change, security cameras
are going to be installed on any new train

on a line with more than 100,000 people
a day, which is honestly, most of them,

except the most sort of
countryside areas in the country.

So even though I live in
sort of a backwater city,

and I travel to Nagoya,
because I travel to a big city

to go to work, I know on my train
line, there’s 100,000 people a day easily.

So from that, any new car put on that line,
and of course the cars are being retired

and replaced all the time, that
means there will be cameras

on the train shooter later, which
I actually think is a good thing.

Just take care of it and private, man.

(upbeat music)

A last creepy dude story, a peeping Tom.

Now, when I think of peeping Tom’s,

I have the sort of cartoonish
image of a guy in a bush,

pushing the bush aside and looking in
through a window, may be climbing a tree.

This guy took it to the next level.

He says he’s like, I wanna
see in this woman’s apartment,

I wanna see what she’s doing,
I wanna peeping Tom, her.

I feel a little bad for everyone named Tom,

this association, I
guess it’s that kid’s

thing, where the names
that were thrown at me,

like Peter Cottontail,
didn’t hurt my feelings,

but peeping Tom, that
actually hurt your feelings.

That’s like a connection
that reflects badly on you.

He decided that there was a seven story
building, he decided the best way to do this

to go look into this woman’s room, would
be to repel down the side of the building.

Now, I have never repelled
anything, but I know the first thing,

if I was gonna repel down a building,
like let’s just say for some reason,

I have the instinct, I’m going to
repel down the side of this building.

I want the rope that
I will be using to repel

with, to be firmly
attached to something.

This guy tied it to a ladder.

Now, ladders don’t tend to
be connected to anything solid.

Therefore, the ladder
slipped and he fell seven story.

They didn’t actually say
how many stories, he survived.

So maybe he didn’t fall all seven stories.

He was arrested, he
was taken to the hospital,

and then when he was released for
hospital, he was immediately arrested.

I was weirdly more
focused on the repelling

aspect of this story than
the actual peeping Tom.

Peeping Tom’s are just
like every gross, needing to

do a new Japan story,
relatively common to be honest.

I like the stories where
they take it to an extreme.

It’s weird when you take it to an extreme,
but you’re also too dumb to do it right.

So it’s the stories where
people take something

to an extreme and they’re kind of like
leveling up versus this guy where he’s like,

I’m gonna do something, I’m not smart
enough to think it all the way through.

I have no intention personally
of doing this kind of thing,

and I already know, I
need to look into repelling

a little bit more before I
start trying to repel anything.

So kids, don’t repel down buildings.

I mean, that’s it.

Just, again, I’m not gonna give
you advice on how to peep or Tom.

I just don’t want you
to repel down buildings.

It’s dangerous, don’t do it.

(upbeat music)

(upbeat music)


(wind whooshing).