I’m innocent

(upbeat music)

Okay, I’ve got a bit of
a new setup, so I have

to make sure, you know,
the mic volume is right.

I’m not hitting my P’s, the plosives
in the wrong spots and things like that.

But I think we’re okay,
so we’re gonna get started.

The boy who was in trouble last week,

17 year old Canadian
boy visits a temple in

Nara and decides,
“Hey, I have a good idea.

“I’m gonna take my fingernail,
I’m gonna carve my name.

into this temple from the year 710.”.

Which is just the dumbest thing you do.

My point last week was,

don’t carve your own name in it.

And then when they say
like, “Did you do this?”

They go, “No, no, that was some
guy called Justin Bieber, “not me.

“I think the kid’s name was Justin,

“so I guess I didn’t work
out if he put Justin in there.”

Ah, flaws everywhere, you gotta
think your plans through criminals.

So, what the temple decided
to do was put up a sign.

The sign is in English
and Japanese bilingual.

The problem is,

Canadian kids aren’t the only problem.

As we have the guy in Italy,
I forget where he was from,

there was a guy who was in Italy and he
carved his name into the call to see him.

His name was Ivan, but I don’t
wanna be so racist in the case.

I think he’s from Belarus, I don’t know.

Anyway, it doesn’t matter.

It’s not an exclusively Western
English problem to be dumb.

It is every country.

So you can’t put up the sign in every
country in every language from every country.


the priest from the temple said, “In the
future we would like to use pictograms,

“so people from all over the world can
understand, “which I think is a great idea.”

It says, “What is the
pictogram for don’t be a moron?

“Don’t damage the site, don’t carve
your name “into ancient temples?”.

I would be mostly concerned about curses.

You go in there and you
put your name on something.

and you put your name on the wrong thing.

You’re cursed forever.

I mean, that’s the first issue.

So another reason death note wise
to put someone else’s name on it.

Don’t stick your own name in an ancient
temple on any document and anything.

Maybe that wall you’ve written
your name on is the curse wall.

You don’t know because you’re visiting
the temple ’cause you’re not an expert.

If you were an expert, you would know

not to put your name on the temple.

This is this shows how
nice Japanese Buddhist

or Chinto priests or
whatever they are were

is they said, “This was
done without malice.”

I actually kinda disagree.

I think the kid knew it was bad.

That’s why he did it.

It is still regrettable and sad.

In Japan, if you damage
ancient stuff, I’m trying to decide,

should I go through all the
rules and stuff or make up,

get it’s kind of used my own
natural speaking languages,

you know, break an old shit,

the breaking old shit
law can be 300,000 yen,

which, wow, a lot of money
isn’t that much money.

Or five years in prison, that’s
on the other hand, is a lot of time.

So you gotta be real careful.

where you stick your name.

Again, I would be less
concerned about 300,000 yen

and way more concerned
about a curse on my eternal soul.

(upbeat music)

All right, so this is actually a big story.

It came up like five, 10 times
in different feeds this week.

And it’s because it’s a big deal.

It is something that
everyone loves story wise.

Certainly you don’t want this to
happen to you or someone you know.

False accusations, false arrests,
accusations flying back and forth.

Oh, it’s terrible.

But it is like the whole
true crime genre is based on

how we like to watch horrible
things happen to other people

and like just sit back with the popcorn.

A man was wrongfully
arrested in a revenge porn case.

A revenge porn is like, I
get newbie pictures of you or

naughty pictures of you and
meet together or something.

And I say, we’ve, our
relationship is sourdad

and I’m going to post them on
the Internet just to get back at you.

That is illegal in Japan.

I think it’s probably illegal in most
places, Japan’s taking it pretty seriously.

I’m assuming because it must
have happened a lot already.

Well, how did we get here?

A guy was harassing a woman.

He was threatening to take nude pictures
of her and post them on the Internet.

Now the pictures that he
sent to her via her Instagram.

were photoshopped.

Apparently, well, I guess, you know,
and the average person doesn’t care.

So she went to the police and like this
guy threatening to put pictures on me.

There were different accounts, but it was
clearly all coming from the same person.

The, some of the accounts
used this guy’s family name.

So she said to the police,
“This guy is sending me stuff.”

The police didn’t do
a lot of investigation.

They arrested him really quickly.

Now they said, because
of the urgency of the

case, we did not have
time to check the IPs.

The thing is, in total, they
held this man for 40 days.

In Japan, you can be held for 20 some days.

by the police without
actually being charged.

What they do is they have,

oh, we have this accusation.

We’re gonna hold you for 20 some days.

I think it’s 24 because of days
off or weekends or something.

It’s an odd number.

It’s not a number you
expect, but I’m just

gonna use 20 ’cause
that’s sort of the base.

Then he gets released and
they grab him again pretty

quickly saying like, oh,
there’s another charge.

We’re gonna hold you.

So they held this man for 40 days.

The whole time he’s insisting is innocent.

The problem is what a criminal is due.

If they listen to an incident in Japan,

they’ve learned that what you
do is like insist your innocent.

Don’t confess, make
the police do their job.

Problem is, you’re actually innocent.

You’re doing exactly what the criminals do.

So I had no intention of
uploading any revenge porn.

I don’t have any newty pictures of her.

The person sending the threats.

That wasn’t me.

What would a criminal say?

That’s what the police
are looking at you going,

what would a criminal say
in the same situation, buddy?

Exactly what you just said.
So we’re holding you.

40 days.

The lawyers for the guy,
they’re pretty accurate.

They’re saying this is hostage
justice to coerce a confession.

So I’m being held for
day after day after day.

I’m gonna lose my job.

I’m gonna have all these other issues.

I have no recourse.

If I want to solve this to end this,

confession is the fastest way.

They’ve had multiple cases in
Japan of people who have confessed

to crimes they didn’t commit
because of this very action.

The lawyers saying like, this is unfair.

It’s inhumane.

What I have learned, though,
and this is the part I actually do

enjoy about the
ingenuity of Japan is what

the things I learn
about police and justice.

And something people
need to know is that the

rules don’t, your rules
from home don’t follow you.

I’ve talked to several
Americans who seem to

think that American
law is international law.

Like they’ll talk about like they
have to read your, your Miranda rights.

And I’m like, well, Miranda
isn’t a thing outside of America.

So Japanese cops don’t
read your Miranda rights.

They just actually grab you
and take you and hold you.

Again, they don’t have to
actually charge you with anything.

It could be an accusation or a suspicion.

And they are legally allowed to
hold you for the 20 X amount of days.

And then they can do that for each charge.

So then they let you go.

And then as you walk
out of the police station,

they pull you back in and go,
well, we’re going to hold you

for another 20 days for another
charge, another accusation.

If we have 15 20 accusations, we
can hold you for 15 20 times, 20 days.

We just have to keep like
going through that cycle.

They can essentially
arrest you for nothing

for years if they have
enough accusations.

Like let’s say each email is
an accusation in this case.

They could hold him for
20 days for each email.

Now it turns out while he was being
held or while he was in one place,

uh, information was being
sent from another place,

that’s how they
realized this isn’t the guy.

But again, that would have been sort
of the first thing you should have done.

That’s actually part of checking IP
addresses when it comes to Internet cases.

And if they had done that right away,
they wouldn’t have held him for 40 days.

Maybe they would have held him for the
first 20 and maybe you could justify that.

But the second 20 days, it
doesn’t really hold up anymore.

And what I’ve learned though
is you can get 1,000 to 12,500

yen a day for each day
you’re held by the police.

Like if you don’t get actually arrested
for a charged with an actual crime.

The man who was falsely
arrested is asking for a senior official

to explain to his family
and go to his work

and explain to his work why he was
basically missing from work for 40 days.

So like this isn’t covered
in your time off policy.

Uh, you could lose your job because
they actually need you to come and do work.

This is one of the problems.

Weirdly, the police have stayed,

and this is we don’t believe there was
any wrongdoing on the prosecutor parts,

which of course is how the police think,
which is maybe one of the big problems.

But that’s also the
way the laws are set up.

So very technically they
haven’t done anything wrong,

but they’re also not held responsible for
interfering within innocent person’s life.

A group of youths,
which is an excellent thing.

I don’t want to use a group.

I want to have like a gaggle, a gaggle.

What would you call it?

A group of youths?

Uh, I was all about to say a conundrum,

but that just implies certain negativity.

I actually think youths are great.


a joy of youths.

Oh, that sounds nice.

Anyways, uh, in Japan,
adulthood used to be 20.

It’s now been taken down to 18.

These youths are now saying, well,
the rules say that if I want to run for

government, I have to be 25
or 30 depends on the position,

but let’s use 25 as our low end
to be like a perfectural governor.

You have to be at least 30 years old to
run for mayor or something else or a local

election. You have to be at least 25.
He’s like, well, if we’re adults,

then we should have adult rights,
which would be running for office.

Uh, I’m all for this.

Ninja Ninja Japan, if you listen for any
amount of time, I have complained multiple

times that we have way too
many 70 year olds in charge.

Way too many people who don’t understand
sort of the modern aspects of life.

Because they’ve been in
politics for the last 50 years.

So they only see politics in a certain
way and anything that’s come up in the

last 20 years, they don’t even
like think about it or consider it.

I think those guys need to be out.
I think we need some fresh blood.

I think youth is the way to go.

Would I vote for an 18 year old?
Probably not.

So again, this is where it
becomes a fair system, though.

Like if community in general thinks 18
is too young to be mayor of the city or

governor of the prefecture,
then they won’t vote for them.

But if the 18 year old is convincing
enough, people will vote for them.

So I think absolutely led 18
year olds run for office any office.

If the world at large things are too
young, they’re not going to vote for them.

It works.

But this is should be a legal right.

So a legal right.

So they’re filing with
the Tokyo district court to

be allowed to run for
office, certainly in Tokyo.

And I am 100% on board.

I hope they’re successful.

This goes to like drinking laws and stuff.

Everything’s just to be established
either in adult or you’re not an adult.

So like America, you’re an adult
at 18, but you can’t drink until 21.

What the fuck?

That doesn’t make any sense.

If I’m an adult and I can drive a car
and I can buy a gun and I can join the

military and I can kill people
on behalf of the government, I

think I should be allowed to
have a cocktail after all that.

But yeah, apparently their laws are
different and they don’t make any sense

to me.
Of course, here’s the other side of youth.

It’s nice to have a
balance between stories.

I do enjoy that.

There were four boys with motorcycles.

They’re driving around.

They’re like, you know what?

This is not exciting enough.

One of the four boys
is like, let’s call the cops.

The driver, there’s like
three o’clock in the morning.

What the kids do in
Japan, they’re in like a gang.

They drive on the wrong side of the road.

They go through red lights and they’ll
do circles around the intersection and

block traffic and they’ll be they’ll
ride like four or five motorcycles wide

so that no one can get past them and
there’ll just be shitty to other drivers.

If they’re out at three
o’clock in the morning.

And they’re like, this is not enough.

We’re causing trouble, but we’re
not getting all the attention we need.

Certainly not the attention we should
have gotten when we were younger,

which would have stopped
this kind of behavior.

Let’s call the cops on ourselves.

Now I have in my many years now of doing
the introduced Japan talked about bad ideas.

Calling the cops on yourself
and not expecting to get arrested.

It’s just a bad idea.

It just doesn’t make sense.

It’s not the way the world works.

So they call the cops the cops
show up and they get arrested.

Well, they all admitted to the charges
and they said we wanted to get the

thrill of luring a police
car and being chased by it.

And I guess you got that.

I don’t know how much
of a car chase this was.

It sounds like they got
taken down pretty quick.

Although in the news story, they
maybe have just cut that part out.

But at the end of the day,

don’t call the cops on yourself.

I think might be this week’s Ninja
News Japan advice for criminals.

In Japan, motorcycle, bicycle, sorry.

We just talked about motorcycles.

Bicycles are classified as light vehicles.

And therefore they must have a
belt just like a car must have a horn.

You could be fined though.

Well, there are some rules about
the bicycle belt that I didn’t know.

This is why I’m putting out this is
almost like a public service announcement.

Bicycles, you can, so
you’re riding a bicycle,

you could be fined
for continuously ringing.

You are a bell.

It’s a violation to ring the bell for fun.

So if you’re just feeling joyous
riding your bicycle and you’re thinking,

ding, ding, ding, yeah, 20,000,
you had to find for you, bitch.

It is prohibited to ring the
bell to get people who are

walking out in front of you,
like pedestrians out of the way.

So you’re riding, you
could ding a link, excuse me,

so I am passing through
20,000 in for you, bitch.

The thing is, I didn’t know this
law before and I know it now.

And I, couple times a week, do
quite long walks and there are a lot of

grannies out there who
do a lot of bicycling on the

sidewalk and they really don’t
want you to be in their way.

They feel like the sidewalk is their
personal highway and they ring the

shit out of their bell and
I’ve just learned that they

ring the bell at me for walking
20,000 yen for you, bitch.

There’s going to be a lot of
20,000 yen fines coming up.

And you just look out for me, grandma.

I’m coming for you.

And that’s the way it’s going to be.

Actually, probably won’t.

I bet by the time I call them
is not a police won’t show up.

This might not be worth it, but
if there is ever a problem, 100%

I’m trying to try to get
old lady pay 20,000 yen.

Not to me, unfortunately, but I’ll
maybe I could do super damages.

They don’t really do that Japan.

It’s too bad.

What do you do when you’re feeling lonely?

When I’m feeling lonely, I
get my little friend here, Dave.

I scratch him and we snuggle.

And that’s that’s really what Dave’s
purpose is, is to make sure that I

don’t feel lonely and go off the rails and
maybe call emergency services 2,761 times.

So I’ve never called
emergency services in Japan.

I’ve never had to lucky me.

That just means I’ve had a lucky life,
but also means I’m not lonely and bored

and thinking like, how
can I entertain myself?

I could ride around a motorcycle at
three o’clock in the morning, call the cops

and get them to chase me, or
I could just sit and over a two

year, nine month period, call
emergency services 2,61 times.

This lady was very, she
said the reason she did it

was she was lonely and I
actually find that quite sad.

I feel a little bad for
the lady because yeah,

she’s, she’s resorted
to this to get attention.

She’s got nothing going on.

And that’s a sad situation.

She would call up the fire department
and say, I have a stomach ache.

I took a large dose of
medicine, my leg hurts.

And she would ask the fire
department to dispatch some Ambulae.

Then when the ambulance arrives,
she would claim she didn’t make the call.

We just started out with a
revenge porn story where an

innocent man was held by the
police and abused by the police.

But this is the opposite
where the police are quite nice.

So it’s really, it’s tough because
I do want to give a balance view.

Most cops that I’ve met, I’ve known,
I’ve dealt with, have actually been

really good people and I feel like
they would never falsely arrest me.

And they would do a proper investigation.

But of course, that’s not everybody.

In this case, she was warned several
times to stop calling emergency services.

And she kept doing it.

And that’s why she’s in trouble.

Did learn about a scam.

There’s a lot of scams targeting older
people and it’s usually on the phone.

And what they do is call you and
try to get you to transfer money,

trying to pretend to be
a relative or something.

But those guys, if they
work in an office, it’s

actually quite easy to
track where they are.

A computer and stuff, IP
addresses, much like again,

our first story of the
day with a revenge porn.

So how do you deal with that?

You get in a car and from eight
o’clock in the morning to 8 P.M. at night,

you stay on the highway and that makes
it much harder for the police to find you.

They can’t ping cell towers as quickly
and it’s, it’s, you keep on the move.

You’re hard to catch.

This is actually some smart criminally.

The problem is if you’re working in 12 hour
shifts, they don’t want to stop the car.

So you got four or five people in this car.

You’re in the car for 12 hours.

You’re driving along the road.

You are pooing and peeping, peeping
in that car, which is really gross.

So I, I mean, I was thinking
about there were 50 cases

involved, which are total about
94 million yen and damages.

So 94 million yen, they’ve
scanned out away from people.

Is that is everyone in the car
getting an equal share of that?

I bet not.

I bet there’s a boss taking majority of
it and he’s paying these guys a salary.

When they say crime doesn’t pay,
this is kind of what I’m thinking about.

How much money am I getting paid to be
in a car for 12 hour straight to pee in a

bottle and maybe poop in
a bucket or something with

other guys in the other
guys are doing the same thing.

So this car is rank by the end of the day.

It is not a place I want to be.

How much money would you have
to pay me for me to do that willingly?

It would have to be a lot of money.

And I bet these low level criminals
are not getting the pay they deserve.

Which is why they should do denies.

I don’t think that’s going
to work out for anybody.

So this is the last interesting story.

This is public policy.

The mayor of Osaka has put
into place or he voted in a place.

He put it up.


He proposed a rule change and he

said that the this is
a really ballsy move.

I kind of like this guy.

He said that government officials
should get a public review and that

public review if it’s low enough,
they should have a salary cut.

So I learned that the mayor of
Osaka makes a million yen a month.

That’s 12 million yen a year.

The average salary is four
to five million yen a year.

So he’s making three,
four times more than

the average salary by
being mayor of Osaka.

Now that it’s actually less than
I kind of would have expected.

But I’m assuming to
get to be mayor of Osaka.

You already have funds elsewhere like
campaign or your rich family or backgrounds.

A lot of political people in
Japan, they’re institutional.

So like their parents were politicians
and their politicians, that kind of stuff.

So the way it’s going to work is they’re
going to do a survey of 3,500 residents.

And if you get a low enough number,
you get a 30% decrease in your salary.

Now you’re still going to be making
way more money than the average person,

but at the same time,
a 30% cut in your salary.

That that sends a message to anybody.

The current mayor has overwhelming support.

So that’s probably why he’s pretty confident
about this, but again, could change.

So I found that an interesting thing.

I think it’s a really nice idea.

I was thinking the way to really
make this effective because again,

you can use American
politics as the standard version

of politics because it’s
in the news all the time.

And it’s all very rich people.

I think if you get low enough
numbers, you should actually have your

personal funds reduced by X
amount of money and put that in.

So like a Trump, let’s say he’s in
office, he gets very low numbers.


X amount of money goes from his
personal accounts into just the tax system.

And he has to pay for
a system he doesn’t like.

So if it was a Republican
and they get a low

score, they have to
pay for social services.

If it’s a liberal.

conservative Republican and Democrat, whoo,
forgot the word Democrat for the second.

If it’s a Democrat and they get a low
score, they have to take money from

their personal life
and pay for the military.

Probably pay for some
cluster bombs or something.

That would give you, you would want
to keep everyone happy, which is what

the politicians are really
supposed to be doing in theory.

So I’m interested in how this works out.

Again, the just the straight up idea of
this guy doing this is pretty cool to me.

So we’ll see if it has an impact on
other aspects of politics in Japan.

I was hoping that’s hoping you
get a view of Dave on my lap.

The problem is, if I do this and you
can see Dave, then you can’t see me.


Part of me thinks Dave is the far
more appealing member of this team.

So you’re here listening to my voice,
but just seeing the little sausage Dave

in his little burrito thing here
would probably be more appealing.

I would, I bet I would get more views.

Because this, I put
this on YouTube that the

podcast version
wouldn’t actually matter.

I probably get more views.

What you were seeing was this, just my
lame chest, the talking mouth at the top.

I actually might do that next week.

Give this a shot.

This might be my new format for YouTube.

Because you don’t see my head.

You just see my mouth talking.

And then you get to Dave here the
whole time because he’s just chilled out.

And if I, if I get him up and scratching
and stuff, it’s almost like SMR.

This might be my new, my new scheme,
my new plan, but then you can’t see the

Domo Coon up there, which is sort of the
secondary appeal of my desk at the moment.

I could move Domo Coon down here.

I mean, that’s empty space right now.

So certainly some things to think about.

I moved my desk around.

Just try to clean everything up.

New format would be pretty solid.

I think I might, I think I might really try
to capitalize on the Dave aspect of the.

NNJ 116 Its not ALL corona

How social distancing is not really working out in Japan, for people who should do it or the people who want you to do it.

Find out where I want to die, how to make money while working and one story that has zero connection with corona virus. Things are looking up.

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